{"id":527,"date":"2011-01-26T09:00:14","date_gmt":"2011-01-26T09:00:14","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/thinplaces\/2011\/01\/three-simple-impossible-words.html"},"modified":"2011-01-26T09:00:14","modified_gmt":"2011-01-26T09:00:14","slug":"three-simple-impossible-words","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/2011\/01\/three-simple-impossible-words.html","title":{"rendered":"Three Simple, Impossible Words"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><!--StartFragment--><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\">Three simple words. Three impossible words.<\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\">I. Need. Help.<\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\">I calculated this pregnancy incorrectly. I was sure I&#8217;d be<br \/>\nearly, so now I look back and I think&#8211;I started asking Peter for help too<br \/>\nearly. He&#8217;s exhausted, what with six weeks straight of getting up with both<br \/>\nkids in the night (Penny almost always needs to go to the potty, and William<br \/>\nalmost always needs his pull up changed, and that&#8217;s on a good night) and<br \/>\ngenerally allowing me to sleep longer in the morning. And yet, since I&#8217;m only<br \/>\ngetting bigger and slower and more tired, I need his help all the more. But he<br \/>\ndoesn&#8217;t have much left to give.<\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\">And there&#8217;s an ice storm on its way. <\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\">So I lay in bed last night thinking about what to do. Do I<br \/>\nask him to skip class and stay home with the kids? Do I try to find a<br \/>\nbabysitter (tough because of driving conditions and also because our kids don&#8217;t<br \/>\nlike having a babysitter when they know I&#8217;m in the house too)? I settled on<br \/>\nanother option&#8211;just figure it out on your own. My inner monologue went<br \/>\nsomething like, &#8220;Sure, you&#8217;re over 40 weeks pregnant. But you can handle a day<br \/>\nor two alone with the kids. People do it all the time. Don&#8217;t be such a wimp.&#8221;<br \/>\nAnd yet the thought also had me on the verge of tears.<\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\">It dawned on me. I. Need. Help.<\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\">I talk\/write about it all the time&#8211;the gift it is to<br \/>\nrecognize our own neediness and vulnerability, the blessing of relying on other<br \/>\npeople, of giving and receiving. And yet I balk at it when I&#8217;m the one on the<br \/>\nneedy end, when I&#8217;m the one who feels weak, when I&#8217;m the one who just can&#8217;t do<br \/>\nit. <\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\"><\/p>\n<p><!--EndFragment--><\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin-top: 0px;margin-right: 0px;margin-bottom: 0.75em;margin-left: 0px;border-top-width: 0px;border-right-width: 0px;border-bottom-width: 0px;border-left-width: 0px;border-style: initial;border-color: initial;padding-top: 0px;padding-right: 0px;padding-bottom: 0px;padding-left: 0px;font-size: 1em;font-weight: normal\">But I recognized my need, finally, and I took the easy way out. I called my mother. She&#8217;s coming, whether or not baby #3 arrives. She&#8217;ll take care of me, and she&#8217;ll take care of our children.<\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin-top: 0px;margin-right: 0px;margin-bottom: 0.75em;margin-left: 0px;border-top-width: 0px;border-right-width: 0px;border-bottom-width: 0px;border-left-width: 0px;border-style: initial;border-color: initial;padding-top: 0px;padding-right: 0px;padding-bottom: 0px;padding-left: 0px;font-size: 1em;font-weight: normal\">I also got a call from my grandmother, who lives next door. My grandmother is 84. She has her own set of needs. She lives in constant pain. She walks with a cane. She has trouble lifting her arms, and simple activities like making the bed or putting on a sweater take tremendous effort. And yet she was calling to offer her help. Because as it happens, her two great-grandchildren (Penny especially) love her company. Penny can spend hours one-on-one with her May May. They tell jokes. They read stories. They play games. And it is a tremendous gift to me.<\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin-top: 0px;margin-right: 0px;margin-bottom: 0.75em;margin-left: 0px;border-top-width: 0px;border-right-width: 0px;border-bottom-width: 0px;border-left-width: 0px;border-style: initial;border-color: initial;padding-top: 0px;padding-right: 0px;padding-bottom: 0px;padding-left: 0px;font-size: 1em;font-weight: normal\">So once again I am trying to live what I have learned. Trying to admit my weaknesses. To ask for help. To receive it with gratitude. And to trust that the one offering help will receive blessing in return.&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Three simple words. Three impossible words. I. Need. Help. I calculated this pregnancy incorrectly. I was sure I&#8217;d be early, so now I look back and I think&#8211;I started asking Peter for help too early. He&#8217;s exhausted, what with six weeks straight of getting up with both kids in the night (Penny almost always needs&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":88,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-527","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-family"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Three Simple, Impossible Words - Thin Places<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/2011\/01\/three-simple-impossible-words.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Three Simple, Impossible Words - Thin Places\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Three simple words. Three impossible words. I. Need. Help. I calculated this pregnancy incorrectly. I was sure I&#8217;d be early, so now I look back and I think&#8211;I started asking Peter for help too early. He&#8217;s exhausted, what with six weeks straight of getting up with both kids in the night (Penny almost always needs&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/2011\/01\/three-simple-impossible-words.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Thin Places\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-01-26T09:00:14+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"amyjuliabecker\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Three Simple, Impossible Words - Thin Places","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/2011\/01\/three-simple-impossible-words.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Three Simple, Impossible Words - Thin Places","og_description":"Three simple words. Three impossible words. I. Need. Help. I calculated this pregnancy incorrectly. I was sure I&#8217;d be early, so now I look back and I think&#8211;I started asking Peter for help too early. He&#8217;s exhausted, what with six weeks straight of getting up with both kids in the night (Penny almost always needs&hellip;","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/2011\/01\/three-simple-impossible-words.html","og_site_name":"Thin Places","article_published_time":"2011-01-26T09:00:14+00:00","author":"amyjuliabecker","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/2011\/01\/three-simple-impossible-words.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/2011\/01\/three-simple-impossible-words.html","name":"Three Simple, Impossible Words - Thin Places","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/#website"},"datePublished":"2011-01-26T09:00:14+00:00","dateModified":"2011-01-26T09:00:14+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/#\/schema\/person\/4dde10eee38770361dc9b46a9413776b"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/2011\/01\/three-simple-impossible-words.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/2011\/01\/three-simple-impossible-words.html"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/2011\/01\/three-simple-impossible-words.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Three Simple, Impossible Words"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/","name":"Thin Places","description":"Amy Julia Becker on Faith, Family, and Disability","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/#\/schema\/person\/4dde10eee38770361dc9b46a9413776b","name":"amyjuliabecker","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/222\/2222023dcae76abe6e896a3cf80e9836x96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/222\/2222023dcae76abe6e896a3cf80e9836x96.jpg","caption":"amyjuliabecker"},"description":"Amy Julia Becker writes about theology, disability, family, and culture. Two major life experiences have shaped her writing and her faith\u00e2\u20ac\u201dcaring for her mother-in-law as she battled cancer and welcoming her daughter Penny into the world after she was diagnosed at birth with Down syndrome. Both experiences expanded and enriched her understanding of what it means to be human and to receive each and every person as a gift.\u00c2\u00a0 A graduate of Princeton University and Princeton Theological Seminary, she is the author of Penelope Ayers: A Memoir, and the forthcoming A Good and Perfect Gift (Bethany House). Her essays have appeared in First Things, The Philadelphia Inquirer, The Christian Century, ChristianityToday.com, and Bloom, among other online venues.","sameAs":["http:\/\/amyjuliabecker.com"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/author\/amyjuliabecker"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/527","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/88"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=527"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/527\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=527"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=527"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=527"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}