{"id":267,"date":"2010-06-14T09:34:29","date_gmt":"2010-06-14T09:34:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/thinplaces\/2010\/06\/thanks-for-getting-married.html"},"modified":"2010-06-14T09:34:29","modified_gmt":"2010-06-14T09:34:29","slug":"thanks-for-getting-married","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/2010\/06\/thanks-for-getting-married.html","title":{"rendered":"Thanks for Getting Married"},"content":{"rendered":"


\n\"Penny<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

Last week at school, Penny attended her first bridal shower,
\nfor one of her teachers. She came home talking to our nanny all about it. They
\ndecided to make a card. Penny instructed: “Mom in a white dress. Dad in a
\n‘cedo.’ And a church. And on the inside write, ‘Thanks for getting married’.” I
\nfound the card propped against the pillows on our bed that evening. <\/p>\n

Little did Penny know that Saturday was our 11th<\/sup>
\nwedding anniversary, our annual opportunity to reflect on this life together,
\nthis commitment to bind ourselves to one another forever, “forsaking all
\nothers.”  <\/span><\/p>\n

We went out to dinner to celebrate, and Peter asked me to
\nrecall one “fond memory” from each year of our marriage. Some of them were
\neasy: finding out I was pregnant with Penny in the spring of 2005, our trip to
\nCalifornia in July of 2001, sitting in the hospital bed with William in my arms
\nin August of 2008, standing with Grand Penny, Peter’s mother, in the kitchen of
\nour little house in Richmond, Virginia in October of 2002. <\/p>\n

The recent years were the hardest to recall. We’ve stopped
\ntaking annual vacations now that we have children. We’ve settled into a
\npredictable rhythm, where every September brings with it a return to the dorm
\nof thirty boys and new freshmen in Peter’s classes and school for Penny, and
\nevery June brings with it a move to Connecticut, with walks through the marsh
\nand playing on the beach and lots of tennis matches for Peter and lots of
\nwriting time for me. I think fondly about our life in a general sense now, but
\nthe particularities are harder to grasp. <\/p>\n

Right now, Penny knows that marriage involves a white dress
\nand a “cedo” and a church. It’s a good beginning. I think back to that day,
\neleven years ago, where Peter and I at age 22 looked (and felt) somewhat like
\nlittle kids playing dress up. I think back to that day, with the dancing and
\nflowers and toasts and cake and the joy of it all… It was a good beginning. But
\nit was only that. Only the beginning of a much less momentous life together, a
\nlife made of arguments about who should make the bed and who should get up this
\ntime in the middle of the night, a life made of reconciliations, of walks as a
\nfamily telling the mundane details of our days in the midst of the chatter of
\nour little ones. It was a good beginning, and it has been a good eleven years.<\/p>\n

“Thanks for getting married.”<\/p>\n

You’re welcome, Penny. It has been our pleasure. <\/p>\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Last week at school, Penny attended her first bridal shower, for one of her teachers. She came home talking to our nanny all about it. They decided to make a card. Penny instructed: “Mom in a white dress. Dad in a ‘cedo.’ And a church. 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Two major life experiences have shaped her writing and her faith\u00e2\u20ac\u201dcaring for her mother-in-law as she battled cancer and welcoming her daughter Penny into the world after she was diagnosed at birth with Down syndrome. Both experiences expanded and enriched her understanding of what it means to be human and to receive each and every person as a gift.\u00c2\u00a0 A graduate of Princeton University and Princeton Theological Seminary, she is the author of Penelope Ayers: A Memoir, and the forthcoming A Good and Perfect Gift (Bethany House). Her essays have appeared in First Things, The Philadelphia Inquirer, The Christian Century, ChristianityToday.com, and Bloom, among other online venues.","sameAs":["http:\/\/amyjuliabecker.com"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/author\/amyjuliabecker"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/267","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/88"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=267"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/267\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=267"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=267"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thinplaces\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=267"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}