{"id":783,"date":"2011-10-19T10:00:55","date_gmt":"2011-10-19T14:00:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/thequeenofmyself\/?p=783"},"modified":"2011-10-02T21:07:08","modified_gmt":"2011-10-03T01:07:08","slug":"783","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thequeenofmyself\/2011\/10\/783.html","title":{"rendered":"Getting Rid Of"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><em>I see &#8220;Begin Again&#8221; as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are on the horizon for us? Please send me your stories of change, transition, and transformation. Our shared experiences serve to inspire and empower us all.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>This amazing poem is from a Queen-in-progress right here in Exotic Brooklyn.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Please keep your fine and inspiring stories coming!<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Thanks.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>xxQueen Mama Donna<\/em><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Getting Rid Of<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>By <a href=\"www.virginformica.blogspot.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Sharon Mesmer<\/a>, NY<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>if I&#8217;m not going<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>to live like this<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>anymore I must will<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>every cell to stand away<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 CA Conrad<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p>To remove<\/p>\n<p>To chuck<\/p>\n<p>To discard<\/p>\n<p>To cast aside<\/p>\n<p>To cast away<\/p>\n<p>To throw away<\/p>\n<p>To toss, fling, dispose<\/p>\n<p>To slough off<\/p>\n<p>comb out<\/p>\n<p>weed out<\/p>\n<p>To cull<\/p>\n<p>To dump<\/p>\n<p>To ditch, defat, degrease, delocalize, kern, pith, scum, prune<\/p>\n<p>To abrogate<\/p>\n<p>To remove unwanted elements<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But what unwanted elements?\u00a0 I&#8217;ll tell you &#8230;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>FearWorryFearWorryFearWorryFearWorryFearWorryFearWorryFearWorry<\/p>\n<p>CheckingCheckingCheckingCheckingCheckingCheckingChecking &#8230; For Infection<\/p>\n<p>Did I Cause It?\u00a0 Will I Cause It?\u00a0 Did I Cause It?\u00a0 Will I Cause It?\u00a0 Did I, Will I, Did I, Will I??<\/p>\n<p>Poor Me Poor Me Poor Me Poor Me Poor Me Poor Me Poor Me Poor Me Poor Me<\/p>\n<p>Got Lost in the Past Got Lost in the Past Got Lost in the Past Got Lost in the Past<\/p>\n<p>Wondering Why Me Why Me Why Me Why Me Why Me Why Me Why Me Why Me<\/p>\n<p>Oh, Me: Whiney \u2014 WhiningWhiningWhiningWhiningWhiningWhiningWhiningWhining<\/p>\n<p>Why Can&#8217;t It Be This Way, Why Can&#8217;t It Be That Way, Why Can&#8217;t It Be This Way, Why Can&#8217;t It Be<\/p>\n<p>THAT WAY \u2014 THAT WAY: MY WAY MY WAY MY WAY MY WAY MY WAY \u2014<\/p>\n<p>(and I don&#8217;t even know what that way is, really, except for &#8230; )<\/p>\n<p>Has To Be Now \/ Have To Know Now \/ Has To Be Now \/ Have To Know Now \/<\/p>\n<p>Has To Be \u2014 Has To Have \u2014 Has To Know &#8230; NOW<\/p>\n<p>WHY?<\/p>\n<p>No Faith No Faith No Faith No Faith No Faith No Faith No Faith No Faith No Faith No Faith<\/p>\n<p>No Trust, No Confidence \u2014 No Trust, No Confidence \u2014 No Trust, No Confidence, Despite Evidence<\/p>\n<p>TO THE CONTRARY<\/p>\n<p>And even now:<\/p>\n<p>BEATING MYSELF UP BEATING MYSELF UP BEATING MYSELF UP BEATING MYSELF UP<\/p>\n<p>Wondering, why can&#8217;t I be like my friend, who said about her husband&#8217;s illness:<\/p>\n<p><em>He&#8217;s slowly getting better, but he&#8217;s not the person he was. And may never be again. <\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Life.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Oh well.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Let me know how it goes with you.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p>What do I really want to get rid of?<\/p>\n<p>This inability to be happy with who I am and where I am<\/p>\n<p>this<\/p>\n<p>very<\/p>\n<p>moment<\/p>\n<p>Because I know<\/p>\n<p>I will look back on all this<\/p>\n<p>in ten years<\/p>\n<p>with fondness.<\/p>\n<p>And smile.<\/p>\n<p>*****<\/p>\n<p>Donna Henes is the author of <a href=\"http:\/\/www.thequeenofmyself.com\" target=\"_blank\">The Queen of My Self: Stepping into Sovereignty in Midlife<\/a>. She is the Midlife Midwife\u2122 offering counseling and upbeat, practical and ceremonial guidance for individual women and groups who want to enjoy the fruits of an enriching, influential, purposeful, passionate, and powerful maturity. <a href=\"http:\/\/www.donnahenes.net\/queen\/consult.shtml\" target=\"_blank\">Consult the MIDLIFE MIDWIFE\u2122<\/a><\/p>\n<p>***<\/p>\n<p>The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to<a href=\"thequeenofmyself@aol.com\" target=\"_blank\"> thequeenofmyself@aol.com<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp; I see &#8220;Begin Again&#8221; as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are on the horizon for us? Please send me your stories of change, transition, and transformation.&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":218,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,7,3],"tags":[473,397,472,13,474,39,293,475],"class_list":["post-783","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-ritual","category-self-esteem","category-womens-issues","tag-breakthrough","tag-change","tag-denial","tag-holistic-living","tag-impasse","tag-power","tag-resistance","tag-resolve"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Getting Rid Of - The Queen of My Self<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/thequeenofmyself\/2011\/10\/783.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Getting Rid Of - The Queen of My Self\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"&nbsp; I see &#8220;Begin Again&#8221; as an ideal theme for this season. 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