{"id":1214,"date":"2010-07-07T13:58:05","date_gmt":"2010-07-07T13:58:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/theirbadmother\/2010\/07\/a-pool-in-time-saves-you-from-heatstroke.html"},"modified":"2010-07-07T13:58:05","modified_gmt":"2010-07-07T13:58:05","slug":"a-pool-in-time-saves-you-from-heatstroke","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/07\/a-pool-in-time-saves-you-from-heatstroke.html","title":{"rendered":"A Pool In Time Saves You From Heatstroke"},"content":{"rendered":"

We have, in our yard, one of those big inflatable pools. It’s hideous. It sits there, a big, lumpen water-patty, a bright blue squatting round thing<\/i>, looking like the effluent of a giant Michelin Man after too many blueberries. I was not supportive of the idea of installing it, but my husband had dragged it home after it was used in the production of a commercial he worked on and insisted that we should put it to use. It’s free<\/i>, he said. Why not?<\/i><\/p>\n

Why not, indeed. Because it’s ugly<\/i>, I said.<\/p>\n

We’ll want to cool off in the summer. We can just put it up right in the yard<\/i>.<\/p>\n

Can we put it up at the back of the yard? Where no one can see it? Can we hide it?<\/i><\/p>\n

We tried to hide it, by putting it as far back in the yard as it would fit, but really: it’s a giant blue inflatable round mass of plastic. You can practically see it from space. There’s no hiding it. And once it was filled with water – about seventy trillion gallons of water – there was no turning back. There it was. There it still is.<\/p>\n

\"june<\/a><\/span>
The thing is, now that it’s, like, over a hundred degrees outside, that big blue mass of plastic doesn’t look so bad. It looks pretty good, in fact; so good, that if someone offered to remove it from our yard I’d throw my body in front of it and threaten to do violence to them or myself, heat permitting.<\/p>\n

And then I’d fill the damn thing up with ice cubes and plunk myself on top and stay there until September. I might just do that, anyway.<\/p>\n

  <\/p>\n

<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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