{"id":1201,"date":"2010-04-14T20:42:54","date_gmt":"2010-04-14T20:42:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html"},"modified":"2010-04-14T20:42:54","modified_gmt":"2010-04-14T20:42:54","slug":"and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html","title":{"rendered":"And The Moon Is The Only Light We See"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;ve been struggling with depression. I&#8217;m always struggling with depression, in some respects, but it feels harder, these days. My husband asks me if I&#8217;m sad, and I tell him no, because depression is different from sadness, but there&#8217;s an element of it there. I&#8217;m struggling with depression, in part, because I&#8217;ve been struggling with so much grief, and the work of grief has worn me down and I&#8217;m tired. I&#8217;m more vulnerable to depression when I&#8217;m tired. Most people are, I think. Just one reason why new moms are so vulnerable to it. So little sleep, so much stress &#8211; it&#8217;s a challenging combination.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m not sure what to do about it. It&#8217;s been over a year since I&#8217;ve seen my psychiatrist, and I&#8217;m not keen to go back. Not for any good reason, really, other than that the idea of talking about what I&#8217;m experiencing makes my anxiety worse. I don&#8217;t like to talk about my feelings. Write about them, sure. But talk? Ugh. <i>Ugh<\/i>.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m not sure what I&#8217;ll do to get through this. Get outside, get some air, breathe. Reflect upon the joy that my children bring me. There&#8217;s always that.<\/p>\n<p><span class=\"mt-enclosure mt-enclosure-image\"><a href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/theirbadmother\/nikon%20-%202010%20441.JPG\"><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"nikon - 2010 441.JPG\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/112\/import\/assets_c\/2010\/04\/nikon%20-%202010%20441-thumb-372x249-12869.jpg\" class=\"mt-image-center\" style=\"margin: 0pt auto 20px;text-align: center\" width=\"372\" height=\"249\" \/><\/a><\/span><br \/>And then, maybe, call the doctor.<\/p>\n<p> <\/p>\n<div><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;ve been struggling with depression. I&#8217;m always struggling with depression, in some respects, but it feels harder, these days. My husband asks me if I&#8217;m sad, and I tell him no, because depression is different from sadness, but there&#8217;s an element of it there. I&#8217;m struggling with depression, in part, because I&#8217;ve been struggling with&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":179,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,21,17],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1201","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-emilia","category-fearlessness","category-post-partum-depression"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>And The Moon Is The Only Light We See - Their Bad Mother<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"And The Moon Is The Only Light We See - Their Bad Mother\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I&#8217;ve been struggling with depression. I&#8217;m always struggling with depression, in some respects, but it feels harder, these days. My husband asks me if I&#8217;m sad, and I tell him no, because depression is different from sadness, but there&#8217;s an element of it there. I&#8217;m struggling with depression, in part, because I&#8217;ve been struggling with&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Their Bad Mother\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2010-04-14T20:42:54+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/theirbadmother\/files\/import\/assets_c\/2010\/04\/nikon%20-%202010%20441-thumb-372x249-12869.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Catherine Connors\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"And The Moon Is The Only Light We See - Their Bad Mother","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"And The Moon Is The Only Light We See - Their Bad Mother","og_description":"I&#8217;ve been struggling with depression. I&#8217;m always struggling with depression, in some respects, but it feels harder, these days. My husband asks me if I&#8217;m sad, and I tell him no, because depression is different from sadness, but there&#8217;s an element of it there. I&#8217;m struggling with depression, in part, because I&#8217;ve been struggling with&hellip;","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html","og_site_name":"Their Bad Mother","article_published_time":"2010-04-14T20:42:54+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/theirbadmother\/files\/import\/assets_c\/2010\/04\/nikon%20-%202010%20441-thumb-372x249-12869.jpg"}],"author":"Catherine Connors","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html","name":"And The Moon Is The Only Light We See - Their Bad Mother","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/theirbadmother\/files\/import\/assets_c\/2010\/04\/nikon%20-%202010%20441-thumb-372x249-12869.jpg","datePublished":"2010-04-14T20:42:54+00:00","dateModified":"2010-04-14T20:42:54+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/#\/schema\/person\/e5cb41c7478a8741b1ca837d0ad3eace"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html#primaryimage","url":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/theirbadmother\/files\/import\/assets_c\/2010\/04\/nikon%20-%202010%20441-thumb-372x249-12869.jpg","contentUrl":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/theirbadmother\/files\/import\/assets_c\/2010\/04\/nikon%20-%202010%20441-thumb-372x249-12869.jpg"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/2010\/04\/and-the-moon-is-the-only-light-we-see.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"And The Moon Is The Only Light We See"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/","name":"Their Bad Mother","description":"Amy Julia Becker on Faith, Family, and Disability","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/#\/schema\/person\/e5cb41c7478a8741b1ca837d0ad3eace","name":"Catherine Connors","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/48c\/48c0936a787715d590be21174b52d353x96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/48c\/48c0936a787715d590be21174b52d353x96.jpg","caption":"Catherine Connors"},"description":"Catherine Connors is a mother, writer and recovering academic who traded the lecture hall for the playroom and discovered that university students and preschoolers have much the same attention span. She still dips her toes into academic waters by writing the occasional scholarly article about the place of motherhood in Western philosophy, but mostly now she changes diapers and wipes noses and indulges in long reflections on whether Yo Gabba Gabba is a harbinger of the decline of western civilization. Oh, and she blogs: in addition to Bad Mother blogging at BeliefNet, she is, among other things, the author of HerBadMother.com, the moderator of Her Bad Mother\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Basement, the co-founder and co-editor of WeCovet, a contributing writer\/editor at MamaPop and BlogHer, and most recently (deep breath) founder of and contributor to Canada Moms Blog. And in her spare time\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 oh, wait. She doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have spare time. But she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s okay with that.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/author\/cconnors"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1201","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/179"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1201"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1201\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1201"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1201"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/theirbadmother\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1201"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}