{"id":32,"date":"2008-10-17T18:13:12","date_gmt":"2008-10-17T18:13:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/textmessages\/2008\/10\/crisis-pregnancy-in-bulgaria.html"},"modified":"2008-10-17T18:13:12","modified_gmt":"2008-10-17T18:13:12","slug":"crisis-pregnancy-in-bulgaria","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/textmessages\/2008\/10\/crisis-pregnancy-in-bulgaria.html","title":{"rendered":"Crisis Pregnancy in Bulgaria"},"content":{"rendered":"

Richard Mouw<\/a>, the president of Fuller Theological Seminary, sent along this story by a woman who had a harrowing, inspiring experience with the delivery of her Downs Syndrome baby in Bulgaria. He heard the woman sharing her testimony in a recent church service, and asked her to type it up so he could share it with us. I’ll paste an excerpt below, and the entire story after the fold:<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

I was pregnant with our 3rd<\/sup>\u00a0child, and at my 34-week check-up we were told that our baby had no amniotic fluid left, that his lungs were tiny and his heart deformed.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Just let him pass away in your womb, we were told.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Shocked and in disbelief, we frantically ran from one clinic to another getting second and third opinions.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Do we trust the doctors here?\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Do I have the guts to check into the hospital where the experts are, despite its notorious reputation?\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Scared and confused, I went home, crawled into bed and cried, hoping I would wake up and it would all go away.\u00a0…<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\n

Thrust into the world of special-needs children, we quickly realized the challenges facing\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>parents of Down Syndrome children in Bulgaria.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>There is hardly any information available in Bulgarian.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>So last spring we had the opportunity to start the first Down Syndrome Parent support group in Bulgaria and got permission from the Down Syndrome Congress and the AAP to translate their materials for a New Parent packet that is distributed to doctors, hospitals, teachers, and new parents all over Bulgaria.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Life includes pain, and ours is small compared to many others.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Jaden is part of a bigger picture, one that we can only see a small part of now.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\n<\/p>\n

\n

Tanja Pankratz<\/p>\n

Wooddale Church<\/p>\n

September 13\/14, 2008<\/p>\n<\/p>\n

“Where are you, God?\u00a0
\n<\/span>I don’t feel you, I don’t see you and I don’t get you.” \u00a0<\/span>I cried out to God on that cold day last
\nOctober, lying in a grungy hospital bed in Bulgaria.<\/p>\n

\n

In my teens, I asked Jesus into my life.\u00a0 <\/span>I wanted His plans and purposes for my
\nlife, and I wanted others to know of His love and grace that had transformed my
\nlife.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

This eventually led me into missions.<\/p>\n

\n

In 2004, my husband and I moved to Bulgaria, and after 3
\nyears felt blessed by our Bulgarian friends and ministry opportunities God was
\ngiving us. \u00a0<\/span>But then, life took a
\nsudden turn.\u00a0 <\/span>I was pregnant with
\nour 3rd<\/sup> child, and at my 34-week check-up we were told that our baby
\nhad no amniotic fluid left, that his lungs were tiny and his heart deformed.\u00a0 <\/span>Just let him pass away in your womb, we
\nwere told.\u00a0 <\/span>Shocked and in
\ndisbelief, we frantically ran from one clinic to another getting second and
\nthird opinions.\u00a0 <\/span>Do we trust the
\ndoctors here?\u00a0 <\/span>Do I have the guts
\nto check into the hospital where the experts are, despite its notorious
\nreputation?\u00a0 <\/span>Scared and confused, I
\nwent home, crawled into bed and cried, hoping I would wake up and it would all
\ngo away.\u00a0 <\/span>I remembered the words I
\nhad just read the night before where Jesus cried out to God, saying, “God will
\nyou take this cup from me, yet not my will but yours.”\u00a0 <\/span>These words rang in my ears
\nanticipating I was in for something hard.\u00a0
\n<\/span>My friend Villi had called me just two days before, asking if I was ok.
\nShe had had a dream that I was sad.\u00a0
\n<\/span>Zacharina had a dream of a baby in trouble and with concern called
\nVilli.\u00a0 <\/span>Did God prepare these dear
\nBulgarian friends to walk this road with me?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

The next day I checked into the feared hospital.\u00a0 <\/span>“He’s alive!”\u00a0 <\/span>“You mean he’s even breathing on his own?” I heard the
\ndoctors comment while performing my emergency C-section.\u00a0 <\/span>My heart leaped with joy.\u00a0 <\/span>Then I heard the word “Downs”, later
\nfollowed by many other grim diagnoses – his heart looks deformed, he might live
\n1-5 years, etc.\u00a0 <\/span>I vividly remember
\nlying in an open room with other laboring and recovering women, staring out the
\ndark, cold window with tears rolling down my cheeks, thankful I had gotten the
\nwindow bed for some semblance of privacy.\u00a0
\n<\/span>The next day I was rolled into a room with a cot\/bed, a sink with cold
\nwater, a bathroom down a cold corridor which the day we had no water smelled
\nlike an outhouse, and cockroaches as my little friendsJ<\/span><\/span>. \u00a0<\/span>Where have I landed? \u00a0<\/span>I spent that week crying and wrestling
\nwith God.\u00a0 <\/span>“Where are you, God, in
\nall this?\u00a0 <\/span>I don’t see you, I don’t
\nfeel you, and I don’t get you.\u00a0 <\/span>I
\ncan’t handle this.\u00a0 <\/span>Lord, please
\ntake him, if he’s only going to live a few years.\u00a0 <\/span>I can’t handle the thought of loving him and then having you
\ntake him.\u00a0 <\/span>I’m scared to bond with
\nhim.”<\/p>\n

\n

Despite the silence, God was there as He promises to
\nbe.\u00a0 <\/span>He found tangible ways to
\nencourage me.\u00a0 <\/span>People around the
\nworld were praying for us.\u00a0 <\/span>Every
\nday Kremi, Villi, Zacharina, Slavica, Megi, Ina, Reni, Cvetla and others came
\nby with flowers, a CD player and music, words from the Bible, a hug, laughter
\nand offers to babysit and bring meals.\u00a0
\n<\/span>They laughed and cried with me.\u00a0
\n<\/span>I heard about some of their more personal past hardships.\u00a0 <\/span>Stories I would have never heard,
\nopportunities to know them more intimately and they me.\u00a0 <\/span>They really cared.\u00a0 <\/span>I felt so loved.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

So, was this all part of His plan, to bond us even closer
\nwith the Bulgarians?\u00a0 <\/span>To make us
\nneedy so they could show us their love?\u00a0
\n<\/span>Was it to walk alongside Margarita who 8 months before bore a child with
\nDowns and was also told to just leave the baby in an orphanage?\u00a0 <\/span>Was it to be able to sympathize and
\nadvocate for my good friend Nade, who soon after gave birth at 31 weeks?\u00a0 <\/span>Was it to bring us home for reasons we
\nyet do not know?\u00a0 <\/span>Was it to grow us,
\nto stretch us, to test our faith?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

We still don’t know the full answer.\u00a0 <\/span>But looking back at what originally
\nfelt like a devastating nightmare, we already have much to be thankful
\nfor.\u00a0 <\/span>We treasure holding our
\nlittle Jaden in our arms and seeing his heartwarming smile and laughter.\u00a0 <\/span>Medically he seems to have none of the problems
\nthat were predicted and which are often common with Downs babies.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Thrust into the world of special-needs children, we quickly
\nrealized the challenges facing \u00a0<\/span>parents
\nof Down Syndrome children in Bulgaria.\u00a0
\n<\/span>There is hardly any information available in Bulgarian.\u00a0 <\/span>So last spring we had the opportunity
\nto start the first Down Syndrome Parent support group in Bulgaria and got
\npermission from the Down Syndrome Congress and the AAP to translate their materials
\nfor a New Parent packet that is distributed to doctors, hospitals, teachers,
\nand new parents all over Bulgaria.\u00a0
\n<\/span>\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Life includes pain, and ours is small compared to many
\nothers.\u00a0 <\/span>Jaden is part of a bigger
\npicture, one that we can only see a small part of now.\u00a0 <\/span>What we do know is that God loves us
\nand that we are part of His greater plan of bringing people, including us, to
\nhimself and transforming us into His likeness, a plan God works out in the joys
\nand trials of our lives.\u00a0 <\/span>So while we
\ndo not know all His ways nor what the future holds, we do know His love, and we
\nknow in a new way the deep love of our Bulgarian friends.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Richard Mouw, the president of Fuller Theological Seminary, sent along this story by a woman who had a harrowing, inspiring experience with the delivery of her Downs Syndrome baby in Bulgaria. 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