{"id":607,"date":"2011-08-13T01:46:33","date_gmt":"2011-08-13T05:46:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/sweetshore\/?p=607"},"modified":"2011-08-13T01:46:33","modified_gmt":"2011-08-13T05:46:33","slug":"be-careful-what-you-say","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/2011\/08\/be-careful-what-you-say.html","title":{"rendered":"Be Careful What You Say&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Did you ever think about how the words that come out of your mouth affect people&#8217;s lives?<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s a funny thing&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>How often, in the course of dealing with your children do you hear yourself saying something like this: &#8220;Don&#8217;t ride your bicycle too fast&#8230;&#8221; \u00a0&#8220;Don&#8217;t stick that marble up your nose&#8230;&#8221;Don&#8217;t jump in that puddle&#8230;&#8221;?<\/p>\n<p>Did you know that it&#8217;s been proven scientifically that when you make a statement that is a negative, your hearer almost always eliminates the &#8220;Don&#8217;t&#8221; part of your sentence and only hears it as a positive? \u00a0Therefore, your 10 -year-old hears you saying: &#8220;Ride your bicycle fast.&#8221; Your 2-year-old, who might never have thought of sticking that marble up his nose until you mentioned it is now considering it, and your 5-year-old suddenly can&#8217;t stop thinking about jumping into that puddle.<\/p>\n<p>This also carries over into our relationships with adults, co-workers, spouses, and on and on it goes.<\/p>\n<p>One of my favorites is the TV anchor that says, &#8220;Don&#8217;t try this at home.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Your boss who says, &#8220;You&#8217;d better not make another mistake like that one.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The person who says, &#8220;Don&#8217;t judge me because&#8230;&#8221; is only calling attention to whatever his particular issue is, be it ethnicity, social status, intelligence. I can honestly say that there have been times when I had not even entertained a prejudicial thought in a given situation, but being accused of doing so suddenly brings it into the front of my mind with laser sharp focus.<\/p>\n<p>Now, I know some of you are going to say, &#8220;Well, God spoke in negatives when He gave Moses the law,&#8221; and that is a true statement. The result of that, according to the Apostle Paul, was that they couldn&#8217;t ever live up to the commandments and were always falling short: &#8220;The law was brought in so that the trespass might increase. But where sin increased, grace increased all the more..&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Jesus presents a different way of living life: \u00a0&#8220;You shall love the Lord your God with all of your heart, mind and soul, and your neighbor as yourself.&#8221; \u00a0We are called to take positive action, in an atmosphere of grace, not condemnation.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m guilty far too often of making negative statements. \u00a0I&#8217;m not espousing &#8220;Speak it and it will happen&#8221; faith, sometimes called &#8220;name it and claim it.&#8221; \u00a0What I am saying is that people will try to live up to positive instructions and encouragement.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m going to try tracking myself for a few days and see how often I speak negatively to someone instead of encouraging and building them up to accomplish good things.<\/p>\n<p>Why don you try it for a few days and let me know what happens.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Did you ever think about how the words that come out of your mouth affect people&#8217;s lives? It&#8217;s a funny thing&#8230; How often, in the course of dealing with your children do you hear yourself saying something like this: &#8220;Don&#8217;t ride your bicycle too fast&#8230;&#8221; \u00a0&#8220;Don&#8217;t stick that marble up your nose&#8230;&#8221;Don&#8217;t jump in that&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":424,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10,102,4,5],"tags":[114,117,116,115],"class_list":["post-607","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-children","category-faith-2","category-how-to-survive-and-enjoy-motherhood-part-1","category-personal-observations","tag-grace","tag-law","tag-negative","tag-positive"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Be Careful What You Say... - Sweet Shore<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/2011\/08\/be-careful-what-you-say.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Be Careful What You Say... - Sweet Shore\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Did you ever think about how the words that come out of your mouth affect people&#8217;s lives? It&#8217;s a funny thing&#8230; How often, in the course of dealing with your children do you hear yourself saying something like this: &#8220;Don&#8217;t ride your bicycle too fast&#8230;&#8221; \u00a0&#8220;Don&#8217;t stick that marble up your nose&#8230;&#8221;Don&#8217;t jump in that&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/2011\/08\/be-careful-what-you-say.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Sweet Shore\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-08-13T05:46:33+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Nora Puls\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Be Careful What You Say... - Sweet Shore","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/2011\/08\/be-careful-what-you-say.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Be Careful What You Say... - Sweet Shore","og_description":"Did you ever think about how the words that come out of your mouth affect people&#8217;s lives? It&#8217;s a funny thing&#8230; How often, in the course of dealing with your children do you hear yourself saying something like this: &#8220;Don&#8217;t ride your bicycle too fast&#8230;&#8221; \u00a0&#8220;Don&#8217;t stick that marble up your nose&#8230;&#8221;Don&#8217;t jump in that&hellip;","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/2011\/08\/be-careful-what-you-say.html","og_site_name":"Sweet Shore","article_published_time":"2011-08-13T05:46:33+00:00","author":"Nora Puls","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/2011\/08\/be-careful-what-you-say.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/2011\/08\/be-careful-what-you-say.html","name":"Be Careful What You Say... - Sweet Shore","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/#website"},"datePublished":"2011-08-13T05:46:33+00:00","dateModified":"2011-08-13T05:46:33+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/#\/schema\/person\/ea9fca3c7f1f3ca8962f1e81579ecc29"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/2011\/08\/be-careful-what-you-say.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/2011\/08\/be-careful-what-you-say.html"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/2011\/08\/be-careful-what-you-say.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Be Careful What You Say&#8230;"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/","name":"Sweet Shore","description":"Beliefnet Voices - Nora Puls","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/#\/schema\/person\/ea9fca3c7f1f3ca8962f1e81579ecc29","name":"Nora Puls","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/author\/npuls"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/607","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/424"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=607"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/607\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":608,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/607\/revisions\/608"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=607"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=607"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/sweetshore\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=607"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}