{"id":7695,"date":"2024-08-14T19:41:48","date_gmt":"2024-08-14T19:41:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/strongermarriages\/?p=7695"},"modified":"2024-08-15T20:43:27","modified_gmt":"2024-08-15T20:43:27","slug":"judge-judy-on-parenting-youre-not-supposed-to-be-friends","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/strongermarriages\/2024\/08\/judge-judy-on-parenting-youre-not-supposed-to-be-friends.html","title":{"rendered":"Judge Judy on Parenting: \u201cYou’re not supposed to be friends.\u201d"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"\"
Kathy Hutchins \/ Shutterstock.com<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Judy Sheindlin, better known as \u201cJudge Judy\u201d after the popular daytime program, recently shared her perspective on parenting during an interview with Fox News Digital<\/em><\/a>. \u201cEvery parent, unless you\u2019re psychotic, you want your children to grow up to be responsible, law-abiding, productive citizens and mates and friends. And it\u2019s a parent\u2019s responsibility to take care of building that morality from at home,\u201d she said. \u201cThat\u2019s not anybody else\u2019s responsibility. That\u2019s not a school\u2019s responsibility. That\u2019s not a community\u2019s responsibility.\u201d She stated that a parent\u2019s own morality sets the tone. She cited the example of a six-year-old picking up a phone call from a parent\u2019s mother-in-law and being told to say that they are not at home. \u201cWell, that sounds innocent enough, doesn\u2019t it?\u201d said Sheinlin. \u201cBut what you\u2019re really teaching the child in that moment is it\u2019s okay to lie. My parents, my parents, I look up to you just told me it\u2019s okay to lie.\u201d<\/p>\n

She also pushed back against the desire parents have to be buddies with their children. \u201cParents sometimes run into trouble when they say, \u2018we just want to be our kids\u2019 buddy.\u2019 But children require rules, just as the adults do. I mean, the country is in the state it\u2019s in now because the rules get blurred,\u201d she said. \u201cSo my advice to parents is you’re not supposed to be friends.\u201d She encouraged parents to enforce boundaries and lay down strict rules. As a mother of five and grandmother to 13, Sheindlin has had a lot of experience in what she\u2019s talking about.<\/p>\n

Her son, Adam Levy, said he appreciates his mother\u2019s approach. \u201cI became the cross-examiner that I am because of her. Growing up, whenever I was a little off, if I told a lie, if I tried to cover something up because I did something wrong, she always knew. She knew,\u201d he said. \u201cAnd it wasn’t just that she had that sixth sense, which she did, but she was able to ask a series of questions that ultimately I was unable to answer.\u201d Levy now serves as a judge on \u201cTribunal Justice.\u201d<\/p>\n

Sheindlin\u2019s comments come at a time when \u201cgentle parenting\u201d is beginning to face some scrutiny. The Daily Wire\u2019s<\/em> Matt Walsh recently spoke out<\/a> against the popular trend making its way on TikTok, calling it \u201cdangerous.\u201d He noted that 75 percent of millennial parents identify with the \u201cgentle parenting\u201d style. He cited an example of gentle parenting from Parent.com which recommended a parent suggest a child tie their shoes rather than tell them to tie their shoes. Walsh said such ways of approaching a child draws away from a parent\u2019s responsibility to \u201ccommand respect\u201d from their children. He shared several videos of gentle parenting techniques and criticized them for their lack of authority. In a post on X, he criticized parents for not being an authority figure in their homes. \u201cA lot of very bad parenting ideas have become popular in recent decades. One of the worst is that you should never offer \u2018because I said so\u2019 as an answer to your child when he asks why he has to do something or why he can\u2019t do something,\u201d he wrote<\/a>. \u201cIn fact, \u2018because I said so\u2019 is one of the best and most effective answers you can give. You should say it as much as possible. A child should be trained to respect your authority and follow your instructions whether or not he understands or agrees. Weak leaders explain themselves, cajole, and negotiate. Many parents today are weak leaders in their homes.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Judy Sheindlin, better known as \u201cJudge Judy\u201d after the popular daytime program, recently shared her perspective on parenting during an interview with Fox News Digital. \u201cEvery parent, unless you\u2019re psychotic, you want your children to grow up to be responsible, law-abiding, productive citizens and mates and friends. And it\u2019s a parent\u2019s responsibility to take care…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":630,"featured_media":7698,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"fbia_status":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[36,48],"tags":[795],"class_list":["post-7695","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-celebrities","category-parenting","tag-judge-judy"],"yoast_head":"\nJudge Judy on Parenting: \u201cYou're not supposed to be friends.\u201d<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/strongermarriages\/2024\/08\/judge-judy-on-parenting-youre-not-supposed-to-be-friends.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Judge Judy on Parenting: \u201cYou're not supposed to be friends.\u201d\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Judy Sheindlin, better known as \u201cJudge Judy\u201d after the popular daytime program, recently shared her perspective on parenting during an interview with Fox News Digital. \u201cEvery parent, unless you\u2019re psychotic, you want your children to grow up to be responsible, law-abiding, productive citizens and mates and friends. And it\u2019s a parent\u2019s responsibility to take care…\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/strongermarriages\/2024\/08\/judge-judy-on-parenting-youre-not-supposed-to-be-friends.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Stronger Marriages\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2024-08-14T19:41:48+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2024-08-15T20:43:27+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/413\/2024\/08\/Judge-Judy_credit-Kathy-Hutchins-Shutterstock.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1200\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"900\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Cecilia Buchanan\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Judge Judy on Parenting: \u201cYou're not supposed to be friends.\u201d","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/strongermarriages\/2024\/08\/judge-judy-on-parenting-youre-not-supposed-to-be-friends.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Judge Judy on Parenting: \u201cYou're not supposed to be friends.\u201d","og_description":"Judy Sheindlin, better known as \u201cJudge Judy\u201d after the popular daytime program, recently shared her perspective on parenting during an interview with Fox News Digital. \u201cEvery parent, unless you\u2019re psychotic, you want your children to grow up to be responsible, law-abiding, productive citizens and mates and friends. 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