{"id":282,"date":"2020-06-18T18:04:20","date_gmt":"2020-06-18T18:04:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/strongermarriages\/?p=282"},"modified":"2020-06-18T18:04:20","modified_gmt":"2020-06-18T18:04:20","slug":"study-reveals-playing-hard-to-get-actually-works","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/strongermarriages\/2020\/06\/study-reveals-playing-hard-to-get-actually-works.html","title":{"rendered":"Study Reveals Playing \u2018Hard to Get\u2019 Actually Works"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Pexels.com<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Playing \u2018hard to get\u2019 has always been a prominent tactic in the dating world and while some may be skeptical of using the tactic in their own dating life, a recent study confirms that playing hard to get does increase a potential mate\u2019s desirability.<\/p>\n

The dating tactic has the ability to stroke ones ego or provide a person with the confidence to pursue a partner. There is also a level of uncertainty that comes along with pursuing someone that you aren\u2019t sure is in to you. Mixing the thrill of the tactic, along with uncertainty creates an exciting game of cat and mouse.<\/p>\n

The study was conducted by the University of Rochester where three inter-connected experiments were set up. All of the participants were told they would be chatting with another person of the opposite sex, but really they were just talking to a member of the research team. During these experiments, participants were asked to discuss their perception the other person\u2019s potential value as a mate was, how much they desired the person sexually, and how \u201chard to get\u201d they felt the person they were talking to was.<\/p>\n

The results found that participants with a \u201chard to get\u201d profile were seen more desirable by the person they were talking to across all three experiments than participants who had less selective profiles. Participants across the board felt that if they had to put in more of an effort to gain an individuals attention, they were seen more valuable and sexually attractive. \u00a0Participants who spoke with hard to get profiles tried a lot harder to convince the other person to continue interactions in the future.<\/p>\n

\u201cPlaying hard to get makes it seem as if you are more in demand\u2014we call that having higher mate value,\u201d \u00a0said Harry Reis, a professor of psychology and Dean\u2019s Professor in Arts, Sciences & Engineering at Rochester.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe all want to date people with higher mate value. We\u2019re trying to make the best deal we can,\u201d Reis added.<\/p>\n

Dating is always going to be a gamble and people shouldn\u2019t put so much emphasis on one particular method working over another.\u00a0 The authors of the study suggest using caution when playing hard to get to ensure you aren\u2019t coming off as uninterested or arrogant to a potential mate. They suggested that the best approach to dating is to be semi hard to get. You want to be approachable without revealing too much too soon.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Playing \u2018hard to get\u2019 has always been a prominent tactic in the dating world and while some may be skeptical of using the tactic in their own dating life, a recent study confirms that playing hard to get does increase a potential mate\u2019s desirability. 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