{"id":2867,"date":"2012-07-18T11:03:47","date_gmt":"2012-07-18T15:03:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/simplelife\/?p=2867"},"modified":"2012-07-18T12:14:46","modified_gmt":"2012-07-18T16:14:46","slug":"when-conflict-comes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/simplelife\/2012\/07\/when-conflict-comes.html","title":{"rendered":"When conflict comes"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>It is inevitable that conflict will come when two people live, work, play or worship together.\u00a0 An extremely quoteable\u00a0pastor from years past, Jack Green, once said, \u201cIf two people live together, there will be conflict, unless one of the two\u00a0people is dead.\u201d<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve always assumed that if there is a conflict between two people at least one of those people is angry.\u00a0 That does not\u00a0mean, of course, that one of the two people is sinning.\u00a0 The Bible clearly says, \u201cBe angry and sin not.\u201d\u00a0 This makes it pretty clear that you can be angry and not sin.<\/p>\n

I am\u00a0area director of Special Gathering of Indian River, which is a ministry within the mentally challenged community. Our mission is to do classic ministry, evangelizing and discipling the people we serve.\u00a0 Like every other pastor who ministers to a particular group, we deliberately tackle issues that are relevant to our members.\u00a0 We talk about the sheltered workshop and having “a job on the outside.” We try to deal with the issue of having to live with your parents FOREVER.\u00a0 Proper behavior with your girl\/boyfriend is a scorching hot topic.\u00a0 Yet, I\u2019ve never squarely faced with our members the issue of siblings\u2013until it was a Biblical topic.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Our sermon was on Jacob and Esau.\u00a0 We are all familiar with the bitter rivalry that these men faced, even in the womb.\u00a0 Both mother and father were guilty of fostering these battles, which eventually led to resentments.\u00a0 In the sermon, I explained to our members that their brothers and sisters have given up a lot for them.\u00a0 Because many of our members were sick as children and they have always had special needs, their siblings lives were different from others in their peer group.\u00a0 I urged them to say thank you to their brothers or sisters for helping them and for being kind to them.<\/p>\n

I was surprised because one especially sensitive young woman, Michal,\u00a0spoke up and said, \u201cI don\u2019t have to. \u00a0My sister loves me.\u201d\u00a0 While I don\u2019t often welcome interruptions during our devotion time, I was happy for this one.\u00a0 As she spoke several of our members vocally agreed with her.\u00a0 Obviously, I\u2019d not made my point clearly.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo!\u201d\u00a0 I tried to clarify.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m not saying that they resent you so you need to say thank you.\u00a0 I\u2019m saying they have given up a lot for you; and for that reason you need to say thank you. Recently, the Holy Spirit spoke to my heart and said, \u201cYou are so involved with what you don\u2019t have that you don\u2019t appreciate what you do have.\u201d<\/p>\n

It is true that our members are discriminated against almost everywhere.\u00a0 But in their homes, they often receive preferential treatment.\u00a0 Siblings see it.\u00a0 They may even be angry; but it\u2019s been my experience that few of them sin.\u00a0 They embrace their disabled partner in family life and move on, helping where they can.\u00a0 Siblings deserve a big thank you for their love, understanding, and caring.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>All of us have people in our lives that we take for granted. \u00a0The evening I graduated from high school, I didn’t want to go out with my friends because I knew that there would be lots of drinking and partying. \u00a0As a Christian, I didn’t want to put myself into that position. \u00a0We had invited my cousin to come to the graduation that was held in the evening. \u00a0After a long and very hot graduation ceremony, my parents took my cousin home. \u00a0Then we all headed for home. \u00a0I asked, “Can we go get ice cream?”<\/p>\n

“No,” my mother said. \u00a0“We have to go home.” \u00a0I was shocked and wounded. \u00a0It seemed that they would understand that it was a big evening for me and all I wanted some ice cream. \u00a0As soon as I got home, I started a fight about the ice cream and ran to my room in tears.<\/p>\n

My mother came into the dark bedroom and sat on my bed. \u00a0I thought she had come to soothe me. \u00a0Instead she scolded, \u00a0“You have no idea how hard it was for your father to get off work to be able to come to your graduation this evening. \u00a0You know your dad has been working 60 hours a week for the past four months? \u00a0He had to fight his boss to come to your graduation. \u00a0Even though he is exhausted, he has already left to go back to work.” \u00a0Mama got off my bed and headed to the door. \u00a0As she left the room, she said nothing but her silence shouted to me, “It’s time to grow up and be thankful for you have!”<\/p>\n

Perhaps it’s the father who attended every sports event and risked getting fire to do it or other members of your family. \u00a0Even after I was married and we had chilren, I remember several times that my father and mother dropped everything and came to help us when we had a need. \u00a0They lived more thant 400 miles away. \u00a0Coming to our aid was no easy matter.<\/p>\n

Is there someone in your life that you need to thank?\u00a0 Perhaps your husband or wife who does so many little things to please you?\u00a0 What about another person who is careful to help you?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It is inevitable that conflict will come when two people live, work, play or worship together.\u00a0 An extremely quoteable\u00a0pastor from years past, Jack Green, once said, \u201cIf two people live together, there will be conflict, unless one of the two\u00a0people is dead.\u201d I\u2019ve always assumed that if there is a conflict between two people at…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":387,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,5,20,3,397,40,186,49,16,8,85,212,4],"tags":[690,21,688,7,699,431,715,701,694,19,689,6,430],"class_list":["post-2867","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-autism-spectrum","category-christianity","category-church","category-developmental-disabilities","category-devotions","category-faith","category-hope","category-inspiration","category-intellectual-disability","category-mentally-challenged-community","category-prayer-2","category-repentance","category-simple-truths","tag-autism-spectrum","tag-christian","tag-christianity","tag-developmental-disabilities-2","tag-faith","tag-graduation","tag-hope","tag-inspiration","tag-intellectual-disability","tag-mental-retardation","tag-mentally-challenged-community","tag-simple-scriptural-truths","tag-thankfulness"],"yoast_head":"\nWhen conflict comes - A Simple Life, a Childlike Faith<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/simplelife\/2012\/07\/when-conflict-comes.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"When conflict comes - A Simple Life, a Childlike Faith\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"It is inevitable that conflict will come when two people live, work, play or worship together.\u00a0 An extremely quoteable\u00a0pastor from years past, Jack Green, once said, \u201cIf two people live together, there will be conflict, unless one of the two\u00a0people is dead.\u201d I\u2019ve always assumed that if there is a conflict between two people at…\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/simplelife\/2012\/07\/when-conflict-comes.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"A Simple Life, a Childlike Faith\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2012-07-18T15:03:47+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2012-07-18T16:14:46+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/simplelife\/files\/2012\/07\/conflict-at-home.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Linda G. 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