{"id":2726,"date":"2012-01-05T19:48:57","date_gmt":"2012-01-05T19:48:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/prayables\/?p=2726"},"modified":"2012-01-05T19:58:36","modified_gmt":"2012-01-05T19:58:36","slug":"where-do-you-live","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/prayables\/2012\/01\/where-do-you-live.html","title":{"rendered":"Where Do You Live?"},"content":{"rendered":"<h3 style=\"text-align: center\">Daily Joke<\/h3>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/309\/2011\/10\/dailychuckle.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-full wp-image-60\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/309\/2011\/10\/dailychuckle.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"150\" height=\"89\" \/><\/a>You live in Colorado when&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.<br \/>\n2. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and he stops at the day care center.<br \/>\n3. A pass does not involve a football or dating.<br \/>\n4. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail.<\/p>\n<p>You live in California when&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>1. You make over $250,000 and you still can&#8217;t afford to buy a house.<br \/>\n2. The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell phone.<br \/>\n3. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.<br \/>\n4. You know how to eat an artichoke.<br \/>\n5. You drive your rented Mercedes to your neighborhood block party.<br \/>\n6. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.<\/p>\n<p>You live in New York City when&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>1. You say &#8220;the city&#8221; and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.<br \/>\n2. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty or the Empire State Building.<br \/>\n3. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can&#8217;t find Wisconsin on a map.<br \/>\n4. You think Central Park is &#8220;nature.&#8221;<br \/>\n5. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multi-lingual.<br \/>\n6. You&#8217;ve worn out a car horn.<br \/>\n7. You think eye contact is an act of aggression.<\/p>\n<p>You live in upstate New York when&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>1. You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco.<br \/>\n2. Halloween costumes fit over parkas.<br \/>\n3. You have more than one recipe for moose.<br \/>\n4. Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons.<br \/>\n5. The four seasons are: almost winter, winter, still winter, and construction.<\/p>\n<p>You live in the Deep South when&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>1. You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.<br \/>\n2. &#8220;ya&#8217;ll&#8221; is singular and &#8220;all ya&#8217;ll&#8221; is plural.<br \/>\n3. After five years you still hear, &#8220;Ya ain&#8217;t from &#8217;round here, are ya?&#8221;<br \/>\n4. &#8220;He needed killin'&#8221; is a valid defense.<br \/>\n5. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob, Mary Sue, Betty Jean, etc.<\/p>\n<p>You live in the Midwest when&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>1. You&#8217;ve never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name.<br \/>\n2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor.<br \/>\n3. You have had to switch from &#8220;heat&#8221; to &#8220;A\/C&#8221; on the same day.<br \/>\n4. You end sentences with a preposition: &#8220;Where&#8217;s my coat at?&#8221;<br \/>\n5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, &#8220;It was different!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>You live in Florida when&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>1. You eat dinner at 4:15 in the afternoon.<br \/>\n2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind &#8211; even houses and cars.<br \/>\n3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.<br \/>\n4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.<br \/>\n5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #ff00ff\"><strong>READ MORE and enjoy these features from the Daily Prayable! <\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>\u2192 <a title=\"Daily Story\" href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/prayables\/2012\/01\/thank-you-god-for-my-best-friend.html\" target=\"_blank\">Daily Story<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>\u2192 <a title=\"Daily Scripture\" href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/prayables\/2012\/01\/koran-551.html\" target=\"_blank\">Daily Scripture<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>\u2192 <a title=\"Daily Prayer\" href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/prayables\/2012\/01\/this-coming-year.html\" target=\"_blank\">Daily Prayer<br \/>\n<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>\u2192 <a title=\"Daily Music\" href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/prayables\/2012\/01\/blessings-laura-story.html\" target=\"_blank\">Daily Music<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>\u2192 <a title=\"Daily Joke\" href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/prayables\/2012\/01\/where-do-you-live.html\" target=\"_blank\">Daily Joke<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>\u2192 <a title=\"Daily Quote\" href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/prayables\/2012\/01\/forgiveness-in-a-chokehold.html\" target=\"_blank\">Daily Quote<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Daily Joke You live in Colorado when&#8230; 1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car. 2. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and he stops at the day care center. 3. A pass does not involve a football or dating. 4. The top of your head&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":463,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[41],"tags":[23,184,1797,1796,1795,1798,1794],"class_list":["post-2726","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-clean-jokes","tag-clean-joke","tag-daily-joke","tag-florida-joke","tag-joke-about-colorado","tag-joke-about-new-york","tag-joke-midwest","tag-where-do-you-live"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Where Do You Live? - Prayables<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/prayables\/2012\/01\/where-do-you-live.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Where Do You Live? - Prayables\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Daily Joke You live in Colorado when&#8230; 1. 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