{"id":5557,"date":"2014-03-25T11:37:17","date_gmt":"2014-03-25T15:37:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/ourladyofweightloss\/?p=5557"},"modified":"2014-03-25T11:37:17","modified_gmt":"2014-03-25T15:37:17","slug":"kick-in-the-tush-tuesday-what-to-do-when-people-peeve-you-off","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/ourladyofweightloss\/2014\/03\/kick-in-the-tush-tuesday-what-to-do-when-people-peeve-you-off.html","title":{"rendered":"Kick in the Tush Tuesday: What to do when people \u2018peeve you off?\u2019"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"kickGreetings Tushkateers!<\/i><\/b>\u00a0 How are y\u2019all doing on this Kick Tush Tuesday?\u00a0 I\u2019m okay.\u00a0 A-okay.\u00a0 Fabulous, in fact, and that\u2019s not to say that every single moment of my life is a cake-walk or a sweet treat.\u00a0 There are little minefields here there and everywhere.\u00a0 Like when people say\u2026well, let\u2019s just say, \u2018mindless things\u2019 to peeve me off. (Peeve Off: An attempt at not being too crass.)<\/i><\/p>\n

For instance, while boarding a plane via a slow moving line, the \u2018gentleman\u2019 behind me says, \u201cI sure hope no fat people sit next to me.\u201d\u00a0 To which I replied with daggers shooting out of my eyes, \u201cI\u2019m a thin person in a fat body.\u00a0 I represent.\u00a0 Watch it buddy.\u201d\u00a0 Of course, he had no idea what I meant.\u00a0 But still\u2026my buttons were pushed and he got the idea.<\/p>\n

And then there was a friend who said to me, \u201cYou know, you were nicer when you were fat.\u201d\u00a0 Really?\u00a0 Really?\u00a0 Are you kidding me?\u00a0 I made it clear that it wasn\u2019t that I was nicer; it was more like I wasn\u2019t a doormat willing to go along with his agenda.<\/p>\n

True enough.\u00a0 Even though I permanently removed my excess weight 13 years ago\u2014a baker\u2019s dozen\u2014people still make anti-fat comments that push my buttons.\u00a0\u00a0 Some people attack my slow eating style (not done yet???) <\/i>and there was that one person who was critical of my style, my tight jeans. (It\u2019s not like my jeans are that tight\u2026what are they even talking about?) <\/i><\/p>\n

As you journey toward and arrive at Sveltesville, it\u2019s important to note that when people change in any way, shape or form, the change can upset other people\u2019s apple carts.. On a subtle and even unconscious level, their universe looks different.\u00a0 They are unnerved.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s important to remember that it\u2019s not about you; it\u2019s about them and their skewed vision of things.<\/p>\n

The \u201cattacker\u201d is more than likely overcome by a flurry of uncomfortable feelings.\u00a0 If they feel threatened by your new lifestyle, your new svelteness, your beauty, your calm, your fabulous hair \u2026 anything \u2026 they may lash out. Their emotions are spilling out and over.<\/p>\n

What to do when people spill out and over and, in the process, \u2018peeve you off?\u2019\u00a0 <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Stay cool man, real cool<\/b>. \u2013 No point in escalating the negative vibes.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
      \n
    1. Remember – it\u2019s not about you<\/b>. You are not responsible for other people\u2019s issues.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
        \n
      1. Do NOT counter attack<\/b>.\u00a0 I know; it is tempting.\u00a0 You think that if you tell that person off, you\u2019ll feel better, and maybe for a nanosecond you do, but ultimately you are a kind, general, compassionate person and it\u2019s best if you simply express how you feel about what they said.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
          \n
        1. Take in a deep breath<\/b>.\u00a0 Exhale.\u00a0 Inhale. Exhale.\u00a0 Again!<\/li>\n
        2. Smile and walk away.<\/b><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
            \n
          1. Control Your State of Mind.<\/b>\u00a0 Remember, dear Tushkateers, you may have some influence with regard to others, but you cannot, you do not control them. \u00a0Their actions are their own. Tend to your own ‘inner garden.’<\/li>\n
          2. Share Your Experiences.<\/b>\u00a0 Let these \u2018insults\u2019 and micro-aggressions go.\u00a0 Tell a friend.\u00a0 Leave a comment.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

            For more insults to injury, Join Our Lady of Weight Loss\u2019s KICK in the TUSH CLUB\/FB<\/a>!<\/p>\n

            \n

            Spread the word\u2013NOT the icing,<\/em><\/p>\n

            Janice Taylor, Life & Happiness Coach, Author, Artist, Positarian<\/em>
            \n wise * fun * utterly useful
            \n<\/em>\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014-
            \nFor the best life, wellness and weight loss wisdom,
            \nvisit Janice:\u00a0             Our Lady of Weight Loss
            \n<\/a><\/em><\/strong>sign up for the\u00a0            Kick in the Tush Club<\/em><\/a> e-newsletter<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

            Greetings Tushkateers!\u00a0 How are y\u2019all doing on this Kick Tush Tuesday?\u00a0 I\u2019m okay.\u00a0 A-okay.\u00a0 Fabulous, in fact, and that\u2019s not to say that every single moment of my life is a cake-walk or a sweet treat.\u00a0 There are little minefields here there and everywhere.\u00a0 Like when people say\u2026well, let\u2019s just say, \u2018mindless things\u2019 to peeve…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":123,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[175,70,82,1397,3,60,1,176,2100,369],"tags":[671,3826,3827,3819,3825,8,3837,1511,3875,248],"class_list":["post-5557","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-coach-yourself-thin","category-janice-taylor","category-kick-in-the-tush-club","category-life-coach-2","category-motivation","category-our-lady-of-weight-loss","category-weight-loss","category-weight-loss-coach-2","category-weight-loss-success-coach","category-weight-loss-tips-2","tag-how-to-lose-weight","tag-janice-taylor","tag-kick-in-the-tush-club","tag-motivation","tag-our-lady-of-weight-loss","tag-weight-loss-coach","tag-weight-loss-motivation","tag-weight-loss-strategies","tag-weight-loss-success-coach","tag-weight-loss-tips"],"yoast_head":"\nKick in the Tush Tuesday: What to do when people \u2018peeve you off?\u2019 - 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