{"id":305,"date":"2012-10-04T16:33:43","date_gmt":"2012-10-04T16:33:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/onfire\/?p=305"},"modified":"2012-10-04T16:33:43","modified_gmt":"2012-10-04T16:33:43","slug":"the-paradox-for-others-not-for-others","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/onfire\/2012\/10\/04\/the-paradox-for-others-not-for-others\/","title":{"rendered":"The Paradox: For others ~ Not for others"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>It\u2019s crazy. Our true personhood and calling flow from desiring to give something of ourselves to help others. However, others are also the #1 squelcher of our personhood and calling.<\/p>\n

How so?<\/p>\n

Abusive authority figures teach us to watch our backsides in order to survive. We learn to continually scan faces and body language for disapproval and danger.<\/p>\n

Teachers grade us. By the middle of first grade we realize there is a huge arbitrary component to grading. Does the teacher like us?<\/p>\n

It\u2019s awful to be left out of the game on the playground. What can we do to make them include us?<\/p>\n

Professionals hold career doors open or closed. We send resumes and make follow-up calls. Did we do it right? Will the person on the receiving end approve?<\/p>\n

Television, movies, the internet, radio\u2014thousands of media messages every day preach: To be noticed or get ahead you must look like Heidi Klum, carve out your niche like Seth Godin and have the personality of Anthony Robbins.<\/em> The bar is high and well-publicized. The package that is us\u2014you and me\u2014doesn\u2019t fit. We struggle to change ourselves.<\/p>\n

\u00a0What\u2019s lost in the process?<\/strong><\/p>\n

We are. Our unique gifts and calling–trashed.<\/p>\n

The planet also loses. An inclusive culture, economic evolvement and spiritual growth stall.<\/p>\n

\u00a0What can we do?<\/strong><\/p>\n

1. Believe that you are a God-created being and are here to be who He created you to be.<\/p>\n

2. Believe that God\u2019s love holds you completely safe.<\/p>\n

3. Cultivate this love in your soul: notice and record the movement of God in your heart and circumstances. Grow. Trust. Love.<\/p>\n

4. Stop seeking the approval of others.<\/p>\n

\u00a0Then turn around and pull them up with you.<\/strong><\/p>\n

– – – – –<\/p>\n

photo credit: theirhistory <\/a>(creative commons)<\/p>\n

– – – – –<\/p>\n

Dear Reader, This is a new Beliefnet blog. I need your help to make it a success. Would you subscribe (see bar above on the right) plus share this post with a friend who may enjoy it? Also, I appreciate your comments.\u00a0 Thank you,<\/p>\n

Gloria Rose<\/em><\/p>\n

Gloria@gloriarose.com<\/a><\/em><\/em><\/p>\n

Twitter<\/em><\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

LinkedIn<\/em><\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It\u2019s crazy. Our true personhood and calling flow from desiring to give something of ourselves to help others. However, others are also the #1 squelcher of our personhood and calling. How so? Abusive authority figures teach us to watch our backsides in order to survive. 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