{"id":273,"date":"2009-01-08T06:32:00","date_gmt":"2009-01-08T06:32:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/omeoflittlefaith\/2009\/01\/fake-jasons-fake-novel.html"},"modified":"2009-01-08T06:32:00","modified_gmt":"2009-01-08T06:32:00","slug":"fake-jasons-fake-novel","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/omeoflittlefaith\/2009\/01\/fake-jasons-fake-novel.html","title":{"rendered":"Fake Jason’s Fake Novel"},"content":{"rendered":"

Yesterday was really inspirational <\/span>and up-with-peopleish<\/a>. I’m conflicted about it. Should I do that kind of thing more or less often?<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>While I’m waiting for your answer, I thought this would be a good time to check in with Fake Jason Boyett<\/a>, my alter ego on Twitter. I started that Twitter account because I found myself wanting to use that format — and its 140-character blank slate — in far more creative ways than standard rules of honesty would allow. In other words, I wanted to make stuff up.<\/p>\n

My first Fake Jason tweet, made up on the spot, ended up being this:<\/p>\n

Starting my new novel. Quick description? It’s “Twilight” meets “Purpose-Driven Life.” But with an unreliable narrator.<\/span> (12.4.08)<\/p>\n

Then I started microblogging as Fake Jason and I couldn’t stop. It wasn’t long before I thought a little more about that first tweet about the fake novel and decided, well, why not insert random fake sentences from the fake novel into my fake twittering? So I did. Turns out the story involves a character named Gina, who must be some kind of investigator or heroine.<\/p>\n

Anyway, I thought it would be fun to gather all the lines from the novel in one place, just to see what we know about it after one month. (Please note: I make these up as I go, with absolutely no forethought. I always try to make the posts as random and weird as possible, with a hard-boiled, noirish tone. Attempts to construct a plot from these snippets will likely melt your brain. Mine, too. But don’t let that stop us from trying.)<\/p>\n

So, here are all the fake novel posts from my fake Twitter account, in order:<\/p>\n

———–<\/p>\n

Random line from my novel: “Gina was thirsty, but it was not the kind of thirst you could quench with a tall glass of Grape Nehi.”<\/span> (12.4.08)<\/p>\n

<\/span>Gina knew who had scrawled the message. It was a hunchback, no doubt. The question now was: Which hunchback?<\/span> (12.4.08)<\/p>\n

<\/span>Gina awoke in a dark tunnel. Her ribs ached, her left shoe was gone, and that oncoming light was certain to be bad news.<\/span> (12.5.08)<\/p>\n

Sunset at last. Frogs chirped in the trees behind the churro hut. Gina crossed herself, thumbed off the safety, and aimed.<\/span> (12.5.08)<\/p>\n

The well was deep, and narrow, and the lava was rising fast. Gina held tight. Only she could rescue the baby.<\/span> (12.8.08)<\/p>\n

Gina looked up, and the night sky above her was as as beautiful, fragile, and dangerous as a set of glass dentures.<\/span> (12.8.08)<\/p>\n

The pelts were stacked up to the rafters. The air was soaked with death. Gina bit into the deer jerky and grinned.<\/span> (12.9.08)<\/p>\n

The creature glared at Gina from the top of the Ferris wheel, the lost manuscript clutched in its claws. Gina shivered. <\/span>(12.10.08)<\/p>\n

Gina slammed to a stop, spilling both her coffee and the vial containing the eaglet’s blood. Now she was mad.<\/span> (12.11.08)<\/p>\n

Gina panicked. The rope was coiled. The strychnine was packed next to the glow sticks. But where was the baking soda?<\/span> (12.15.08)<\/p>\n

She trembled with the effort, briny sweat escaping through every pore, but finally Gina reached the she-bear’s lair.<\/span> (12.17.08)<\/p>\n

It had been a long day. First the car-jacking, then the baby rescue, and then the DVR skipped ‘Judge Mathis.’ Life stunk.<\/span> (12.18.08)<\/p>\n

Bewildered, Gina picked up the gadget and pushed the red button. Nothing happened. At least, nothing nearby…<\/span> (12.23.08)<\/p>\n

Gina slipped beneath the carriage of the Crown Vic. After attaching the beacon, she traced a big ‘G’ into the oilpan scum.<\/span> (1.5.09)<\/p>\n

———–<\/p>\n

This story has already taken some interesting turns. Questions to discuss:<\/p>\n

Who is Gina? <\/span>
What is she after? <\/span>
What roles will the baby eaglet, the she-bear, and the Ferris-wheel “creature” play?<\/span>
What should the fake novel be called?<\/span>
Where should the story go next?<\/span><\/p>\n

(Here’s the Fake Jason Twitter RSS<\/a> feed. Here’s the Real Jason Twitter RSS<\/a>. You don’t have to be on Twitter to get them, btw.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Yesterday was really inspirational and up-with-peopleish. I’m conflicted about it. Should I do that kind of thing more or less often? While I’m waiting for your answer, I thought this would be a good time to check in with Fake Jason Boyett, my alter ego on Twitter. I started that Twitter account because I found…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":84,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[16,1,10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-273","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fiction","category-questions","category-writing"],"yoast_head":"\nFake Jason's Fake Novel - O Me of Little Faith<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/omeoflittlefaith\/2009\/01\/fake-jasons-fake-novel.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Fake Jason's Fake Novel - O Me of Little Faith\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Yesterday was really inspirational and up-with-peopleish. 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