{"id":2571,"date":"2016-01-22T19:33:25","date_gmt":"2016-01-22T19:33:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/ohmystars\/?p=2571"},"modified":"2016-01-22T19:33:25","modified_gmt":"2016-01-22T19:33:25","slug":"pisces-highly-absorbent","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/ohmystars\/2016\/01\/pisces-highly-absorbent.html","title":{"rendered":"Pisces: Highly Absorbent"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"beliefnet<\/a>Hi, I’m Vince for Pisces!<\/strong> You\u2019ll be saying “wow” every time you get involved with one! It\u2019s like a chamois! It\u2019s like a towel! It\u2019s like a sponge! Most people just can\u2019t soak up this much raw sentiment and guilt! Pisces holds twenty times its weight in tears.<\/p>\n

Look at this! (wrings Pisces out over a bucket labelled \u201cEmotional Trauma\u201d)<\/em>\u00a0Holy cow, can Pisces ever take it!<\/p>\n

Why would you want to work twice as hard, emotionally, with anything else? You have issues? Pisces will soak \u2018em up for you. You can make it feel like it\u2019s all Pisces\u2019 fault, and Pisces wrings out good as new! (Bashes Pisces flat against the counter-top)<\/em> Look at that! Completely dry and ready for more of the same!<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s some cola, anger, wine, infidelity, coffee, accusations, and pet stains. Whatever you bring home, Pisces will mop it up and come back for more. Take a Pisces home with you tonight! Marry one! Better yet: get one for your home, and keep one the side at the office. They\u2019ll both blame themselves for your bad behavior! You following me, camera guy? No other sign\u2019s gonna put up with your crap quite like that! Look! I just blamed my drug habit on Pisces\u2026 and Pisces takes it! And look, Pisces is still empathizing! It acts like a vacuum! And yet Pisces still thinks I\u2019m cute! See what I\u2019m telling ya?*<\/p>\n

Pisces! You\u2019ll be saying: make mine Fishy!<\/strong><\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

*WARNING: Performance varies based on Mars placement. May be toxic depending on Ascendant. Basing product performance based on Sun Sign placement is potentially hazardous.<\/em><\/p>\n

Want a free e-book? Sure you do! Click HERE!<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

Questions about your birth chart, or astrology in general? Want to know more about my big discount on readings for new clients? Want a free month of my NEW Subscription Service? Write me for details!<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

CLICK HERE to join the Oh My Stars Facebook Fan Page, and get exclusive content, an additional discount on a reading, more material on blog entries, AND ANOTHER free e-book!<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Hi, I’m Vince for Pisces! You\u2019ll be saying “wow” every time you get involved with one! It\u2019s like a chamois! It\u2019s like a towel! It\u2019s like a sponge! Most people just can\u2019t soak up this much raw sentiment and guilt! Pisces holds twenty times its weight in tears. Look at this! (wrings Pisces out over…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":560,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[128,52],"tags":[2,138],"class_list":["post-2571","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-astrology","category-pisces","tag-astrology","tag-pisces"],"yoast_head":"\nPisces: Highly Absorbent - Oh My Stars<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/ohmystars\/2016\/01\/pisces-highly-absorbent.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Pisces: Highly Absorbent - Oh My Stars\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Hi, I’m Vince for Pisces! You\u2019ll be saying “wow” every time you get involved with one! It\u2019s like a chamois! It\u2019s like a towel! It\u2019s like a sponge! Most people just can\u2019t soak up this much raw sentiment and guilt! Pisces holds twenty times its weight in tears. Look at this! 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You\u2019ll be saying “wow” every time you get involved with one! It\u2019s like a chamois! It\u2019s like a towel! It\u2019s like a sponge! Most people just can\u2019t soak up this much raw sentiment and guilt! Pisces holds twenty times its weight in tears. Look at this! 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