{"id":369,"date":"2017-08-30T12:25:54","date_gmt":"2017-08-30T12:25:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/nextsteps\/?p=369"},"modified":"2017-08-30T12:26:43","modified_gmt":"2017-08-30T12:26:43","slug":"forgiveness-looks-like-practical-level","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/nextsteps\/2017\/08\/forgiveness-looks-like-practical-level.html","title":{"rendered":"What Forgiveness Looks Like on a Practical Level"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Christopher
Christopher Sardegna<\/span><\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Recently I preached a sermon where I mentioned the need to forgive, and afterwards one of my church members came up and asked a great question: “How do you learn to forgive someone?”\u00a0<\/em>Here was my answer to this person, hopefully it will help you as well:<\/p>\n

As hokey as it might sound, forgiveness\u00a0starts with a choice. The emotions of unforgiveness, all the hurt, etc. is so strong that for most, those emotions override everything. Most people don’t forgive until they feel<\/em> like forgiving.<\/p>\n

Forgiving someone begins by choosing to forgive, regardless of feelings. You might not ever feel like forgiving, but you choose to forgive anyways. Your will supersedes your emotions.<\/p>\n

For most, we don’t forgive because we still feel like the offending party still owes us something: an apology, our purity, our childhood, etc. Stripped down, forgiveness is deciding that the offending person doesn’t owe you anything anymore. They don’t owe you an apology, they don’t owe you anything.<\/p>\n

When Jesus says forgive not seven times but seventy-seven (Matthew 18:21-22<\/a>), it’s because the hurt will wash over you on a daily basis. Every time you feel the urge to hate or hold onto bitterness, you have to choose to forgive you again. They don’t owe you anything anymore. I would say something like this out loud every time the pain and urge to hold onto bitterness\u00a0comes to mind, “I forgive _____<\/span>. He\/she doesn’t owe me anything anymore.”<\/em><\/p>\n

Forgiveness\u00a0never really gets easy, but it can\u00a0get easier after time. I hope this helps!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Recently I preached a sermon where I mentioned the need to forgive, and afterwards one of my church members came up and asked a great question: “How do you learn to forgive someone?”\u00a0Here was my answer to this person, hopefully it will help you as well: As hokey as it might sound, forgiveness\u00a0starts with a…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":607,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[114,64,212],"class_list":["post-369","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-next-steps","tag-forgive","tag-forgiveness","tag-healing"],"yoast_head":"\nWhat Forgiveness Looks Like on a Practical Level - Next Steps<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"It's easy to say that we need to forgive, but what does forgiveness actually look like? 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Josh graduated from New Orleans Seminary with a Masters of Divinity and a Doctor of Ministry. Josh has been involved in full-time ministry for over twenty years. He enjoys hiking, beach volleyball, reading, playing anything competitive, and rough-housing with his kids. Josh, his gorgeous wife Robin, his outrageously handsome boys Zeke, Shepherd and Lincoln and his princess Elle, live in northern Virginia. Josh also blogs on Patheos as New Wineskins: an Apologist for the Modern Church and you can find links to all his content on joshdaffern.com. 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