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“It is with the utmost urgency that I write this blog,” announces Jordan Sekulow in the Washington Post‘s On Faith section.

“A group of atheists have filed a lawsuit to prevent the inclusion of the historic Ground Zero Cross at the 9/11 Memorial & Museum. We have learned from their lawsuit that they, ‘have suffered, are suffering, and will continue to suffer damages, both physical and emotional, from the existence of the challenged cross.’

“Atheists have reportedly endured cross-induced, ‘dyspepsia [upset stomach], symptoms of depression, headaches, anxiety, and mental pain and anguish.’

There is a solution for protecting this tiny but highly vocal and litigious segment of the American population, writes Sekulow, his tongue planted firmly in cheek:

In order to ensure that atheists in America never again experience any of the aforementioned ailments, I need your assistance in writing The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Protecting American Atheists.

To help you get started, I’ve identified things that must be removed or altered immediately to rectify the government’s continued disregard for the hurt feelings of godless Americans.

-The new Martin Luther King Jr. National Memorial includes much of “Dr. King’s Spiritual Presence” by permanently inscribing portions of his sermons on the memorial inscription wall

-The Ground Zero Cross at the 9/11 Memorial and Museum.

-The National Motto: “In God We Trust”

-“Under God” in the Pledge of Allegiance

-The National Day of Prayer

CLICK HERE to read more

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