{"id":7,"date":"2010-06-09T21:23:07","date_gmt":"2010-06-09T21:23:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/mindfulnessmatters\/2010\/06\/fomo-getting-what-we-want-in-an-age-of-insatiable-desire.html"},"modified":"2010-06-09T21:23:07","modified_gmt":"2010-06-09T21:23:07","slug":"fomo-getting-what-we-want-in-an-age-of-insatiable-desire","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/2010\/06\/fomo-getting-what-we-want-in-an-age-of-insatiable-desire.html","title":{"rendered":"FOMO: The Cost of Being Permeated by Desire"},"content":{"rendered":"

I recently heard a new acronym: FOMO
\n(fear of missing out). This is a panic that runs through our culture. It
\npermeates, if we are not mindful, every bit of our psyche. FOMO account for one
\nlarge portion of the variance of our suffering. Another portion can be
\nattributed to a new acronym I just coined: FOGWINE (fear of getting what is not
\nexpected). Together these comprise the vast majority of what the Buddha called
\ndukkha<\/i>. Dukkha<\/i>, often translated as suffering, is more aptly translated in on a
\nbroader canvas as “pervasive dissatisfaction.” What are we
\ndissatisfied over? FOMO and FOGWINE. If you watch television, you are inundated
\nwith messages about what you might be missing out on. If you don’t join the
\nArmy, you’ll be missing out on glory, pride, and advancement of your career. If
\nyou don’t drive this car, you’ll be missing out on excitement, status, and the
\nbest bargain of your life. If you don’t get this drug from your doctor, you’ll
\nbe missing out on strengthening your marriage, great sex, and fun. The
\nopportunities to miss out are endless. We keep watching television programs for
\nfear of missing out on something big that everyone else will have seen and will
\nbe talking about. We stay at the party later for fear of missing out on that
\nsomething special that might happen, that Kodak moment that will define this
\ninstant in time.<\/p>\n

FOMO is the representation of what I call the “deprivation
\nmind” in my book, <\/a>Wild Chickens and Petty
\nTyrants: 108 Metaphors for Mindfulness<\/a><\/i>.” <\/i>Are we really missing out? And
\nwhat is it exactly that we are missing out on? This is a problem that besets us
\nwhen we look outside of ourselves for fulfillment. The desire that underlies
\nFOMO is endless, a bottomless pit that can have us chasing our tails in
\npointless pursuit. FOMO keeps us on the wheel like a hamster never reaching
\nthat place of satisfaction (at least the hamster is getting exercise). Like
\neverything that arises in our minds, FOMO can be examined as a mental object.
\nWe can see it as a production of our brain and not a reflection of ultimate
\ntruth. We can challenge it too. What would be so terrible if we did miss out on
\nsomething? Why is it so important to have EVERYTHING? There is an episode of
\nSouth Park that features Cartman pacing in front of a game store awaiting the
\nrelease of the new Wii. Unfortunately for him (and everyone around him) the Wii
\nwon’t be released for another three weeks. Cartman grunts, “Come on … Come on …
\nHow much longer …” He bemoans his fate, “Time is slowing down, It’s like
\nwaiting for Christmas, times a 1000” Certainly we don’t want to resemble
\nCartman in any way, shape, or form. So we can look at FOMO as it arises
\nthroughout our day and try to touch it with mindful attention. We can breathe
\ninto this fear and see what happens. <\/p>\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I recently heard a new acronym: FOMO (fear of missing out). This is a panic that runs through our culture. It permeates, if we are not mindful, every bit of our psyche. FOMO account for one large portion of the variance of our suffering. Another portion can be attributed to a new acronym I just…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":268,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8,9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-mindful-living","category-mindfulnesss"],"yoast_head":"\nFOMO: The Cost of Being Permeated by Desire - Mindfulness Matters<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/2010\/06\/fomo-getting-what-we-want-in-an-age-of-insatiable-desire.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"FOMO: The Cost of Being Permeated by Desire - Mindfulness Matters\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I recently heard a new acronym: FOMO (fear of missing out). 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Dr. Kozak's ability to translate ancient healing traditions into pragmatic applications suitable for modern lifestyles through the use of metaphors have made him a strong voice in healthcare and business. Beginning with a journey to India in the 80\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s where he took the Bodhisattva vows from His Holiness the Dalai Lama, Arnie Dr. Kozak began his lifelong practice in mindfulness meditation. Intent on finding a way to bring the practical healing attributes of mindfulness he began incorporating these techniques in his private practice. In 2002 Dr. Kozak created Exquisite Mind in Burlington, Vermont as a vehicle that could expand his wisdom to larger audiences beyond individual psychotherapy to professionals and corporations, health care providers, public groups and, most recently with Exquisite Mind Golf, amateur and professional golfers. His award-winning new book, Wild Chickens and Petty Tyrants: 108 Metaphors for Mindfulness (Wisdom Publications, 2009) is a thoughtful, funny, and inspiring translation of mindfulness practice through the inventive use of metaphor applicable to our daily lives. In addition to his work with Exquisite Mind, Arnie Kozak, Ph.D., Licensed Psychologist\u00e2\u20ac\u201dDoctorate has been a Lecturer in Psychology at the University of Vermont and is a Clinical Instructor in Psychiatry and Medicine, University of Vermont College of Medicine. He has studied and practiced clinical psychology, meditation, and yoga for more than 25 years. He has studied with several meditation masters, including S. N. Goenka, Larry Rosenberg, Gurumayi Chidvilasananda, and His Holiness the Dalai Lama. After receiving his bachelors degree with honors from Tufts University, he was awarded a Presidential Fellowship to get his Ph.D. in clinical psychology from the University at Buffalo. He completed his training as a Psychological Fellow at the Harvard Medical School. Prior to founding the Exquisite Mind in 2002, Arnie worked ten years in the private sector for the PKC Corporation consulting on mental health content for this revolutionary software company.","sameAs":["http:\/\/exquisitemind.com"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/author\/akozak"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/268"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}