{"id":3999,"date":"2015-05-29T14:07:07","date_gmt":"2015-05-29T18:07:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/?p=3999"},"modified":"2015-05-29T14:07:07","modified_gmt":"2015-05-29T18:07:07","slug":"letting-go-of-hopeful-remnants","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/2015\/05\/letting-go-of-hopeful-remnants.html","title":{"rendered":"Letting Go of Hopeful Remnants"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"axiom_15\"<\/a>A friend of mine who is 70-years-old and very fit, talented, and successful has male pattern baldness–the hair line recedes until there is only a ring of hair left around the bottom of the head. One of my professors in graduate school had it and he would let his red hair grow long. I always thought he looked like Bozo the clown.<\/p>\n

My older friend, recently got his hair cut and he was complaining to me that his hair was cut too short. While he was whining about it, I blurted out quite spontaneously, “Why are you attached to that hopeful remnant?!” I think he would look better off shaving his head completely bald as is currently the fashion.<\/p>\n

My friend could’t stop laughing. The “truth” in that statement seemed to hit him between the eyes and expressed itself in a shocked humor.<\/p>\n

For Bill, he wanted to retain the appearance that he still had hair but all that was left was a remnant of his lost youth. Attachment to that hopeful remnant kept him from enjoying the present moment more fully.<\/p>\n

We all have our own version of hopeful remnants–things we are not ready to let go off, things we are not ready to proclaim dead, finished, or gone. Your hopeful remnant may be a come-over on your head, an old object, or a wistful memory. It may be the hope that something will change in an important relationship that shows no evidence of changing and likely cannot change and hasn’t for years.<\/p>\n

Think about what you are holding onto and ask yourself if you could let it go. Just think of how liberating it will be to jettison that hopeful remnant. You’ll feel lighter as you came into closer contact with the reality of things as they are rather than as you wish them to be.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A friend of mine who is 70-years-old and very fit, talented, and successful has male pattern baldness–the hair line recedes until there is only a ring of hair left around the bottom of the head. One of my professors in graduate school had it and he would let his red hair grow long. I always…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":268,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,8,1],"tags":[1006,1005,1007],"class_list":["post-3999","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-metaphors-for-mindfulness","category-mindful-living","category-the-laboratory","tag-abandoning-hope","tag-letting-go","tag-living-in-the-present-moment"],"yoast_head":"\nLetting Go of Hopeful Remnants - Mindfulness Matters<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"This brief blog post is about letting go of hope for things that we have been holding onto.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, nofollow\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Letting Go of Hopeful Remnants - Mindfulness Matters\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This brief blog post is about letting go of hope for things that we have been holding onto.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/2015\/05\/letting-go-of-hopeful-remnants.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Mindfulness Matters\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2015-05-29T18:07:07+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/files\/2015\/05\/axiom_15.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Dr. Arnie Kozak\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Letting Go of Hopeful Remnants - 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Arnie Kozak","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/#\/schema\/person\/5f92cf2ae15fbe04e74ca47527ac68d8","name":"Dr. Arnie Kozak","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/6ab\/6abd6f3205265768510a13d66ac2aff7x96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/6ab\/6abd6f3205265768510a13d66ac2aff7x96.jpg","caption":"Dr. Arnie Kozak"},"description":"Recognized as an innovator in the field of mindfulness-based psychology, Dr. Arnie Kozak is northern New England's leading expert in the field. Dr. Kozak's ability to translate ancient healing traditions into pragmatic applications suitable for modern lifestyles through the use of metaphors have made him a strong voice in healthcare and business. Beginning with a journey to India in the 80\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s where he took the Bodhisattva vows from His Holiness the Dalai Lama, Arnie Dr. Kozak began his lifelong practice in mindfulness meditation. Intent on finding a way to bring the practical healing attributes of mindfulness he began incorporating these techniques in his private practice. In 2002 Dr. Kozak created Exquisite Mind in Burlington, Vermont as a vehicle that could expand his wisdom to larger audiences beyond individual psychotherapy to professionals and corporations, health care providers, public groups and, most recently with Exquisite Mind Golf, amateur and professional golfers. His award-winning new book, Wild Chickens and Petty Tyrants: 108 Metaphors for Mindfulness (Wisdom Publications, 2009) is a thoughtful, funny, and inspiring translation of mindfulness practice through the inventive use of metaphor applicable to our daily lives. In addition to his work with Exquisite Mind, Arnie Kozak, Ph.D., Licensed Psychologist\u00e2\u20ac\u201dDoctorate has been a Lecturer in Psychology at the University of Vermont and is a Clinical Instructor in Psychiatry and Medicine, University of Vermont College of Medicine. He has studied and practiced clinical psychology, meditation, and yoga for more than 25 years. He has studied with several meditation masters, including S. N. Goenka, Larry Rosenberg, Gurumayi Chidvilasananda, and His Holiness the Dalai Lama. After receiving his bachelors degree with honors from Tufts University, he was awarded a Presidential Fellowship to get his Ph.D. in clinical psychology from the University at Buffalo. He completed his training as a Psychological Fellow at the Harvard Medical School. Prior to founding the Exquisite Mind in 2002, Arnie worked ten years in the private sector for the PKC Corporation consulting on mental health content for this revolutionary software company.","sameAs":["http:\/\/exquisitemind.com"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/author\/akozak"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3999","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/268"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3999"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3999\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4005,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3999\/revisions\/4005"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3999"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3999"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/mindfulnessmatters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3999"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}