{"id":1249,"date":"2010-09-10T01:16:41","date_gmt":"2010-09-10T01:16:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/markdroberts\/2010\/09\/when-someone-sins-against-you-introduction.html"},"modified":"2010-09-10T01:16:41","modified_gmt":"2010-09-10T01:16:41","slug":"when-someone-sins-against-you-introduction","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/2010\/09\/when-someone-sins-against-you-introduction.html","title":{"rendered":"When Someone Sins Against You: Introduction"},"content":{"rendered":"

Christian fellowship is one of life’s sweetest desserts. There’s nothing quite like being with a group of people who love you warts and all. There’s great peace in sharing life with folks who are there to weep when you weep and to rejoice when you rejoice. In times of discouragement, you can rest in the comfort and prayers of sisters and brothers who will help bear your burdens. In times of weakness they will be there to lift you up. Some of my greatest times in life have been in the context of the body of Christ.<\/p>\n

That’s the good news. But there’s not-so-good news, also. The glory of Christian fellowship makes its failures all the more painful. It always hurts when somebody is mean to you. But if that person happens to be a dear brother or sister in Christ, then the pain is magnified several times over. One of the essential and wonderful characteristics of Christian fellowship is vulnerability, the opening of your heart to others as they open their hearts to you. But vulnerability can come back to bite you painfully. The word “vulnerable” stems from the Latin meaning “capable of being wounded.” If you’re vulnerable you’ve let down your guard, which means unkind words and deeds don’t bounce off your shell. Instead, they pierce your heart. Some of my most traumatic times in life have been in the context of the body of Christ.<\/p>\n

In my last series, God’s Guidance for Christians in Conflict<\/i><\/a>, I explained that conflict among Christians is inevitable. I suppose this isn’t quite true. It’s only inevitable if you are genuinely connected with other Christians. If you live as virtual hermit, disconnected from the body of Christ, then you’re pretty much insulated from conflict. But you’re also missing out on one of the greatest joys of the Christian life. Oh, and you’re also disobeying the clear biblical command to share life with the family of God. But the downside of obedience is the inevitability of conflict. Yes, in the body of Christ you’ll find people to rejoice when you rejoice and to weep when you weep, but sometimes your cause for weeping will be the body of Christ. It’s sad, but true.<\/p>\n

As a pastor for the past two decades, I’ve been involved in dozens if not hundreds of conflicts in church. Sometimes these have to do with difference of opinion about church ministry, such as the style of music in worship. But very often the conflicts stem from one member of the church hurting another member. Usually this offense is unintentional; sometimes, however, the perpetrator is actually trying to hurt the victim. Getting even for some other wrong is the most common motivation for such an attack.<\/p>\n

I’m sorry to say that such things happen fairly regularly and will probably happen to you if you’re an active participant in Christ’s church. But God provides lots of guidance for Christians involved in conflict. (This was the main focus of my last series.) Jesus himself specifically addressed the problem of one member of the church sinning against another member. He gave clear, concise, and crucial directions for people involved in such a situation. <\/p>\n

In this series I’m going to unpack that advice so that you’ll know what to do if somebody sins against you (or how to counsel others when they experience this sort of thing). It isn’t terrible complex, and doesn’t need lots of interpretation. Nevertheless, I want to focus your attention on what Jesus has said.<\/p>\n

\"Warning-Red-Command-4.jpg\"<\/span>Before I begin, however, I must add a word of warning. Jesus’ directions for what to do if someone sins against you are among the most frequently ignored instructions in all of Scripture. Actually I’m being too charitable. They’re among the most broken commands in all of God’s Word. In fact, I’d be willing to bet that most Christians disregard and disobey what Jesus taught more than they take it to heart and do it. Sorry if this sounds too negative, but it reflects my experience as a pastor. And, quite frankly, it reflects my experience as a Christian who HATES conflict, and would much rather pretend that it didn’t exist than engage it directly.<\/p>\n

So as we begin this series, you might want to think about how open you are to doing what Jesus says. I guarantee that it will be challenging. But I believe that the rewards of following the directions of Jesus outweigh the costs. These rewards include: reconciliation, spiritual growth, peace of mind, and a healthier, stronger church. When you obey Jesus, you also have the joy of knowing that you actions have been pleasing to him, no matter how the other(s) involved may have responded. <\/p>\n

In my next post in this series I’ll begin to examine in detail what Jesus says we’re to do when somebody sins against us.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Christian fellowship is one of life’s sweetest desserts. There’s nothing quite like being with a group of people who love you warts and all. There’s great peace in sharing life with folks who are there to weep when you weep and to rejoice when you rejoice. In times of discouragement, you can rest in the…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":214,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[191],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1249","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-when-someone-sins-against-you"],"yoast_head":"\nWhen Someone Sins Against You: Introduction - Mark D. 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Roberts","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/f2d\/f2ddf5f080861f66ea230384f9d1bab2x96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/f2d\/f2ddf5f080861f66ea230384f9d1bab2x96.jpg","caption":"Mark D. Roberts"},"description":"The Rev. Dr. Mark D. Roberts is a pastor, author, retreat leader, speaker, and blogger. Since October 2007 he has been the Senior Director and Scholar-in-Residence for Laity Lodge, a multifaceted ministry in the Hill Country of Texas. Before coming to Laity Lodge, he was for sixteen years the Senior Pastor of Irvine Presbyterian Church in Irvine, California (a city in Orange County about forty miles south of Los Angeles). Before his time at Irvine Pres, Mark served on the staff of the First Presbyterian Church of Hollywood as Associate Pastor of Education. (Thanks to Janel Pahl for taking the photo to the right.) Mark studied at Harvard University, receiving a B.A. in Philosophy, an M.A. in the Study of Religion, and a Ph.D. in New Testament and Christian Origins. He has taught classes in New Testament for Fuller Theological Seminary and San Francisco Theological Seminary. Mark has written several books, including No Holds Barred: Wrestling with God in Prayer (WaterBrook, 2005), Dare to Be True (WaterBrook, 2003), Jesus Revealed (WaterBrook, 2002), After \"I Believe\" (Baker, 2002), and Ezra, Nehemiah, Esther (Word, 1993). His most recent book is Can We Trust the Gospels? Investigating the Reliability of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John (Crossway, 2007). He is currently working on a commentary on Ephesians that will be published by Zondervan in 2014. Mark writes a devotional for The High Calling of Our Daily Work, a website associated with Laity Lodge. His \"Daily Reflections\" can be viewed online or sent as a daily email. If you wish to receive this email, just visit TheHighCalling.org and sign up. Mark serves on the editorial board of Worship Leader magazine, where he publishes articles and reviews, including his regular column \"Lyrical Poetry.\" Additionally, he has published dozens of articles in leading magazines and journals. He often speaks for churches and other Christian groups, and has been interviewed on over seventy-five radio programs nationwide. Mark is married to Linda, who is a Marriage and Family Therapist, a Spiritual Director, and a retreat speaker. They have two children, Nathan and Kara.For Publicity Photos and Bio Statements for Mark, please check here. Mark's Dossier Professional History: Senior Director and Scholar-in Residence, Laity Lodge, October 2007 to present. Senior Pastor Irvine Presbyterian Church, June 1991 to September 2007 Adjunct Assistant Professor Fuller Theological Seminary, 1994 to 2007. Courses: New Testament Theology and Exegesis. Adjunct Instructor San Francisco Theological Seminary, 1995 to 2001. Courses: New Testament Greek and Exegesis Associate Pastor of Education First Presbyterian Church of Hollywood, 1987-1991 Teaching Fellow Harvard University, 1980-1983 Education: Ph.D. in the Study of Religion. Harvard University, 1992. Area: New Testament and Christian Origins M.A. in the Study of Religion Harvard University, 1984. A.B. magna cum laude in Philosophy Harvard University, 1979. Phi Beta Kappa; Danforth Fellowship Books: Can We Trust the Gospels? Investigating the Reliability of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. Crossway, 2007 No Holds Barred: Wrestling with God in Prayer. WaterBrook, 2005 Dare to Be True: Living in the Freedom of Complete Honesty. WaterBrook, 2003. Jesus Revealed: Know Him Better to Love Him Better. WaterBrook, 2002. After \"I Believe\": Experiencing Authentic Christian Living. Baker, 2002. Ezra, Nehemiah, Esther in the Communicator's Commentary Series. Word, 1993. Contacting Mark: You can reach Mark at: E-mail: mark@markdroberts.com mroberts@laitylodge.org Phone: Laity Lodge: (830) 792-1216 Address: Laity Lodge 719 Earl Garrett Kerrville, TX 78028","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/author\/mroberts"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1249","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/214"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1249"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1249\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1249"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1249"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/markdroberts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1249"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}