{"id":909,"date":"2020-07-17T11:11:25","date_gmt":"2020-07-17T11:11:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/?p=909"},"modified":"2020-07-17T11:11:25","modified_gmt":"2020-07-17T11:11:25","slug":"things-to-remember-when-dating-someone-with-an-autistic-child","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2020\/07\/things-to-remember-when-dating-someone-with-an-autistic-child.html","title":{"rendered":"Things To Remember When Dating Someone With An Autistic Child"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"Parenting\u00a0is never easy \u2014 throw in a child with special needs, and it just got a whole lot more complicated. Parenting a child diagnosed with autism can be exhausting, frustrating and lonely. Wanting to find a partner to share that with, to find someone who will love you and be there and make you laugh, isn\u2019t unreasonable. Doing it, though, can be hard.<\/p>\n

Autism is a spectrum of developmental delays, social and communication impairments, and unusual interests or behaviors. According to the CDC<\/a> 1 in 54 children are diagnosed with autism. When you initially hear the ASD diagnosis, you may feel anxious, overwhelmed, and unprepared, because you don’t know what to do or expect.<\/p>\n

Here are 10 things you can do if your child is diagnosed with autism<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Advocate for your child<\/h2>\n

When my son was diagnosed, his pediatrician said to me, “Be your child’s advocate, his future depends on that.” You are the voice for your child, without you, your child may not get the help that he or she needs. Communicate with your child’s therapist, neurologist, developmental specialist, teacher(s), and\/or caregivers if you have questions or concerns about your child. You need to speak up if you notice things like your child regressing in their developmental abilities.<\/p>\n

Learn about ASD<\/h2>\n

There are many autism magazines<\/a>,<\/strong> books, blogs, and videos that will give you parenting tips and advice to help you be more informed about ASD. The more you know the more successful that your child will be. I was blessed and fortunate enough to recognize early warning signs and began learning about ASD before he was diagnosed.<\/p>\n

Educate others<\/h2>\n

Educate friends, caregivers, teachers, and family about what your child is going through and make them aware of what their condition means, so they understand what you are going through and can offer support. When you educate people about ASD, they are less inclined to change them and more inclined to accept who they are, quirks and all.<\/p>\n

Understand your child’s behaviors<\/h2>\n

Your child may use nonverbal cues or repetitive movements to communicate with you, like pacing back and forth, spinning in circles, or flapping their arms. Understanding your child’s behaviors will give you insight on what comforts them, what triggers disruptive behavior, what they are sensitive to, and when they are hungry, upset, or tired.<\/p>\n

An Example:<\/strong> My son is nonverbal, and doesn’t have the concept of pointing at what he wants. Instead, he pulls me to certain rooms. Nudging me to the kitchen means he’s hungry, his bedroom means he’s tired and the bathroom means he wants to take a bath.<\/p>\n

Create a routine and be consistent<\/h2>\n

You will hear this over and over again, your child needs a strict schedule or routine more so than a neuro-typical child. Autistic children need consistency. Some experts say that they crave consistency because they perform better when they have a consistent routine for meals, therapy, school, bedtime, and other activities. A minor change could mean your child won’t eat, may have a meltdown, or will fight to go to sleep.<\/p>\n

Build a support network<\/h2>\n

It is important to have a support network<\/a>, to lean on when you feel burnt out or overwhelmed. If you have a school-aged child with autism get involved with the school. Search online for support groups that can offer tips on how to deal with things. It is okay to get frustrated or want to pull out your hair, however, you need to know when to seek help and get the support you need.<\/p>\n

Get involved in the community<\/h2>\n

Being involved in the community is a great way to meet other parents, and introduce your child to new things. Find different activities that you can get your child involved in so that he\/she knows there’s a world outside of therapy and home. Getting involved with a church or religious organization in your area is a good way to have your child interact with other children and get involved with trying new activities.<\/p>\n

Utilize your resources<\/h2>\n

You need to know where to go for special education services, and what type of early intervention and government services that are available for children with autism. Depending on your child’s age, government assistance programs provide you with assistance for counseling, therapy, and more. If your child is under the age of 3 or 4 many areas offer at no-cost, an Early Intervention program that leads to an Individualized Education Plan (IEP).<\/p>\n

Create a safe place for your child<\/h2>\n

When your child is overstimulated, you need to have a safe place for them. Children with ASD need and prefer their own space. Somewhere they can go to get away from others. A safe place is where they can comfort themselves.<\/p>\n

Take care of yourself<\/h2>\n

It is understandable that you are exhausted, and overwhelmed because raising any child let alone an autistic one can be challenging. But you need to make sure you take care of yourself, this includes going to doctor appointments for you and having time to yourself. Your child needs you at your best, who else is going to advocate for them, and help them succeed in life?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Parenting\u00a0is never easy \u2014 throw in a child with special needs, and it just got a whole lot more complicated. Parenting a child diagnosed with autism can be exhausting, frustrating and lonely. Wanting to find a partner to share that with, to find someone who will love you and be there and make you laugh,…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":620,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-909","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nThings To Remember When Dating Someone With An Autistic Child - Make Your Relationship Work<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2020\/07\/things-to-remember-when-dating-someone-with-an-autistic-child.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Things To Remember When Dating Someone With An Autistic Child - Make Your Relationship Work\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Parenting\u00a0is never easy \u2014 throw in a child with special needs, and it just got a whole lot more complicated. 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I\u2019m Alex. I\u2019m just a normal guy like any other guy. But what makes me different, is what makes you want to keep your eye out for my blog. I\u2019ve been studying social dynamics and personal development for the last 15 years. I\u2019ve helped men in meeting women. I\u2019ve helped men reaching their goals in life and I\u2019ve helped myself develop the lifestyle that I want. You can learn all that and draw from my experience through my blog. Why should you read this blog? The goal is simply giving you the tools and knowledge in how you can change your life and create the lifestyle that you want. Do you want to improve your dating life? Do you have goals you don\u2019t know how to reach? Do you feel that your life is boring and feel stuck? I will share my years of experience and knowledge in exactly those areas. Areas in the past which I had trouble with too. However I\u2019ve found the key to solving those problems and I\u2019m sharing it all here, so you don\u2019t have to go through years of trial and error like me. What is lifestyle development? Lifestyle development deals with every area of your life whether it\u2019s being relationships, finances, health or personal growth. The blog\u2019s aim is to help you create the amazing lifestyle that you want. Through my blog you will be able to follow my experiences and lessons. Articles and videos aimed to educate and motivate you into taking the necessary steps in getting the life you deserve. 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