{"id":741,"date":"2019-12-19T14:41:59","date_gmt":"2019-12-19T14:41:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/?p=741"},"modified":"2019-12-19T14:44:18","modified_gmt":"2019-12-19T14:44:18","slug":"buried-in-busy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/12\/buried-in-busy.html","title":{"rendered":"Buried In \u201cBusy\u201d"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\" wp-image-753 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/411\/2019\/12\/entrepreneur-593358_1920-350x232.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"516\" height=\"342\" \/><\/p>\n<p><em>Two men were sitting at the bar talking. The one man asks \u201cWhy do you drink so much?\u201d The other man says \u201cI drink to forget\u201d to which the first man asks \u201cWhat are you trying to forget?\u201d to which the other man says \u201cI don\u2019t remember\u201d.<\/em>\u00a0This is a very old joke, kind of a groaner yet it illustrates a reason why many people become addicted or become obsessive.<\/p>\n<p>We live in a busy world. I hear people tell me everyday how busy they are and that they are too busy to do some of things that they know they should be\/want to be doing. In today\u2019s culture many people wear their \u201cbusy\u201d like a Boy Scout wears a merit badge. I talk to busy people a lot throughout the day. When I ask how they are doing, they often tell me that they are very busy; they use expressions like \u201cI am drinking from a fire hose\u201d or \u201cI am as busy as a one armed paper hanger\u201d. For some the bouts of busy are simply parts of the ebbs and flow of life. For many though \u201cbusy\u201d becomes like an addiction.<\/p>\n<p>For the people who are addicted to being busy I find that they are often in this constant busy mode for a couple of reasons. One reason is that\u00a0 like the man in the joke who drinks to forget the obsessively busy person stays busy because they also want to forget, they don\u2019t want to slow down to the point where they have time to think about themselves or face their reality. In fact they often fear stillness for it is in their stillness that they may have to look within and they fear what they may discover.<\/p>\n<p>Another reason that a person is perpetually busy is that they believe being busy equals being important. I worked with a person a few years ago who was always extremely busy and she used every opportunity to tell me and demonstrate to me and everyone else how busy she was. When you went into her office for a scheduled meeting, the meeting would constantly be interrupted by phone calls on her office phone, phone calls on her cell phone that were too important not to answer, emails that she just had to respond because they were \u201chot\u201d and IMs from important people who she could not make wait. She let you know that she was important by how busy she was. Meetings with her were always rushed and unproductive because of all of the interruptions. She could have just as easily shut everything off for a few minutes however it was important for her to show other people how busy she was because in her mind busy equaled important. I have known many people who use being busy this way. I believe that this type of busy is often a cover-up for ones insecurity, that deep down they fear they are not important and that they must constantly be busy to be perceived as important. The interesting irony is that most people who are in this mode may be busy, however they are rarely efficient and rarely productive and they find themselves buried in a ton of incomplete tasks and they often do not find much joy in their journey.<\/p>\n<p>Do you find yourself buried in busy? Do you find that you are excusing yourself from doing things that you need to do to take care of yourself? Do you use \u201cI am too busy\u201d to excuse your eating habits, your sleep patterns,\u00a0 your inability to take time to meditate, your inability to find time to do the things that you love,\u00a0 to\u00a0 spend time with the people you love, etc?<\/p>\n<p>If you answer yes to any of these questions than I encourage you to examine the \u201cbusy\u201d in your life and to ask yourself why you are so busy. Ask what is the motivation behind your \u201cbusy\u201d? Are you using your \u201cbusy\u201d because you are avoiding something in your life? Are you using busy to promote your importance?<\/p>\n<p>Reducing the \u201cbusy\u201d in your life is very much like removing the clutter from your home. You will discover that there is much joy and freedom to be found when you are less busy plus you will create room to grow. Much like a cluttered house, when you are too busy you have very little room to grow.<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>\u201cBeware the barrenness of a busy life\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>\u2013\u00a0<\/strong>Socrates<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Two men were sitting at the bar talking. The one man asks \u201cWhy do you drink so much?\u201d The other man says \u201cI drink to forget\u201d to which the first man asks \u201cWhat are you trying to forget?\u201d to which the other man says \u201cI don\u2019t remember\u201d.\u00a0This is a very old joke, kind of a&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":620,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-741","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Buried In \u201cBusy\u201d - Make Your Relationship Work<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/12\/buried-in-busy.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Buried In \u201cBusy\u201d - Make Your Relationship Work\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Two men were sitting at the bar talking. The one man asks \u201cWhy do you drink so much?\u201d The other man says \u201cI drink to forget\u201d to which the first man asks \u201cWhat are you trying to forget?\u201d to which the other man says \u201cI don\u2019t remember\u201d.\u00a0This is a very old joke, kind of a&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/12\/buried-in-busy.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Make Your Relationship Work\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-12-19T14:41:59+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2019-12-19T14:44:18+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/411\/2019\/12\/entrepreneur-593358_1920-350x232.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Alex Wise\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Buried In \u201cBusy\u201d - Make Your Relationship Work","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/12\/buried-in-busy.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Buried In \u201cBusy\u201d - Make Your Relationship Work","og_description":"Two men were sitting at the bar talking. The one man asks \u201cWhy do you drink so much?\u201d The other man says \u201cI drink to forget\u201d to which the first man asks \u201cWhat are you trying to forget?\u201d to which the other man says \u201cI don\u2019t remember\u201d.\u00a0This is a very old joke, kind of a&hellip;","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/12\/buried-in-busy.html","og_site_name":"Make Your Relationship Work","article_published_time":"2019-12-19T14:41:59+00:00","article_modified_time":"2019-12-19T14:44:18+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/411\/2019\/12\/entrepreneur-593358_1920-350x232.jpg"}],"author":"Alex Wise","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/12\/buried-in-busy.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/12\/buried-in-busy.html","name":"Buried In \u201cBusy\u201d - Make Your Relationship Work","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/12\/buried-in-busy.html#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/12\/buried-in-busy.html#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/411\/2019\/12\/entrepreneur-593358_1920-350x232.jpg","datePublished":"2019-12-19T14:41:59+00:00","dateModified":"2019-12-19T14:44:18+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/#\/schema\/person\/bb1a6f316ea30c450e6f03a651e64888"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/12\/buried-in-busy.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/12\/buried-in-busy.html"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/12\/buried-in-busy.html#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/411\/2019\/12\/entrepreneur-593358_1920-350x232.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/411\/2019\/12\/entrepreneur-593358_1920-350x232.jpg"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/12\/buried-in-busy.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Buried In \u201cBusy\u201d"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/","name":"Make Your Relationship Work","description":"Relationship Improvement, Lifestyle Development, Personal Growth","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/#\/schema\/person\/bb1a6f316ea30c450e6f03a651e64888","name":"Alex Wise","description":"Welcome to my blog. I\u2019m Alex. I\u2019m just a normal guy like any other guy. But what makes me different, is what makes you want to keep your eye out for my blog. I\u2019ve been studying social dynamics and personal development for the last 15 years. I\u2019ve helped men in meeting women. I\u2019ve helped men reaching their goals in life and I\u2019ve helped myself develop the lifestyle that I want. You can learn all that and draw from my experience through my blog. Why should you read this blog? The goal is simply giving you the tools and knowledge in how you can change your life and create the lifestyle that you want. Do you want to improve your dating life? Do you have goals you don\u2019t know how to reach? Do you feel that your life is boring and feel stuck? I will share my years of experience and knowledge in exactly those areas. Areas in the past which I had trouble with too. However I\u2019ve found the key to solving those problems and I\u2019m sharing it all here, so you don\u2019t have to go through years of trial and error like me. What is lifestyle development? Lifestyle development deals with every area of your life whether it\u2019s being relationships, finances, health or personal growth. The blog\u2019s aim is to help you create the amazing lifestyle that you want. Through my blog you will be able to follow my experiences and lessons. Articles and videos aimed to educate and motivate you into taking the necessary steps in getting the life you deserve. I am also a freelance editor and writer for Loveawake.com dating site.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/author\/awise"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/741","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/620"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=741"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/741\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":756,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/741\/revisions\/756"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=741"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=741"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=741"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}