{"id":615,"date":"2019-09-25T10:42:55","date_gmt":"2019-09-25T10:42:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/?p=615"},"modified":"2019-09-25T10:45:20","modified_gmt":"2019-09-25T10:45:20","slug":"nice-guy-edge","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/09\/nice-guy-edge.html","title":{"rendered":"How To Be A Nice Guy With An Edge"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\" wp-image-617 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/411\/2019\/09\/adult-background-casual-941693-300x259.jpg\" alt=\"adult-background-casual-941693\" width=\"489\" height=\"422\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Do you totally identify with the old saying \u201cnice guys finish last?\u201d Well, maybe it\u2019s not your niceness that\u2019s killing your chances with the ladies\u2026 perhaps you need to hone your \u201cedge&#8221;.<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>Your \u201cedge\u201d is all about confidee in yourself and your decisions. Not bragging. Not ego. Just confidence.<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>So, how do you hone your edgy nice guy skills?<span id=\"more-2394\"><\/span><\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>Identify if your key trouble spot when it comes to women. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/08\/hey-ladies-confident-men-go.html\">Lack of confidence<\/a> or lack of action. If you don\u2019t know where to start, ask your gal pals or more confident male friends. I bet they\u2019ve been trying (or wanting) to tell you for years.<\/li>\n<li>Create an action plan to help yourself overcome the areas you pinpoint as potential pivot points.<\/li>\n<li>Execute your action plan.<\/li>\n<li>If you\u2019re having trouble acting on your plan, get accountability and encouragement from a friend with your best interests at heart.<\/li>\n<li>Catch girl.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><em>\u201cConfidence is courage at ease.\u201d<\/em><strong>\u00a0\u2014 Daniel Maher<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Need some help creating an effective plan? Here are some thoughts and ideas that may help\u2026<\/p>\n<p><strong>Be comfortable in your own skin<\/strong>. Do NOT apologize for who you are. Girls do not dig guys who don\u2019t dig themselves. This may be one of the times you have to fake it till you make it, but remember that everything you believe about yourself, might as well be written down on a billboard that travels with you thru life.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Listen carefully to the tapes you\u2019re playing in your head\u2026 which ones are leading you astray? Knock those bad boys out by focusing on and developing the areas where you are truly a rockstar.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Smash down your fear by creating and plan and acting on it<\/strong>. Something about the making a plan and sticking to it, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/08\/forget-term-alpha-male.html\">increases your belief<\/a> in your ability to get \u2018er done! Another huge plus: every time you face that fear, you get to desensitize yourself to the fear that\u2019s freezing you.<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><em>\u201cInaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.\u201d<\/em><br \/>\n<strong>\u2014 Dale Carnegie<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>What exactly is it that you\u2019re afraid of? Are you afraid of rejection? Most people are! Are you afraid you\u2019ll get hurt? It could happen\u2026 then, of course, if you don\u2019t try, you\u2019ll never get the flipside of joy and anticipation. By letting fear hold you back, you\u2019ve just signed up for a life lived in quiet desperation.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Get out of the fog of fear by forgetting about yourself. When you focus on getting to know the other person or just really living your life with joy and excitement, often times, you can convince fear to loosen its grip on your mind.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>Challenge yourself to be a leader and decision maker. Even if you start with other parts of your life than dating, you\u2019ll change the vibe that you\u2019re sending out to the ladies. Guys \u2014 girls LOVE a guy who knows how to make decisions.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Get to know yourself<\/strong>\u00a0and what you really want in life and relationships. It may be that you\u2019ve just been aiming for the girls that the media tells you that you want. When in reality, you\u2019d be much happier with a totally different kind of woman.<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-616 alignleft\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/411\/2019\/09\/asshole-300x199.jpg\" alt=\"asshole\" width=\"300\" height=\"199\" \/>Be confident in the women you pick. The smart guys sit back and watch to see what the girl is really like. But make it active watching rather than <a href=\"https:\/\/blog.loveawake.com\/2019\/09\/25\/dear-men-being-passive-is-killing-your-relationships\/\">passive watching<\/a>. You are making a decision about her and your interest, not just waiting around for her to notice you.<\/p>\n<p>If you want quantity over quality or only have sexual conquest on the mind, then you may want to consider adopting some \u201cbad boy\u201d traits because bad boys certainly do get the numbers when it comes to conquest.<\/p>\n<p>But personally, I think the world needs more confident gentlemen running around. And I believe that the confident gentlemen are the guys who really end up with what they want; while the bad boys are scarfing down Viagra 3 divorces later and hoping that the oxygen tank doesn\u2019t interfere with their ability to look hot to the fine ladies in the nursing home.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Do you totally identify with the old saying \u201cnice guys finish last?\u201d Well, maybe it\u2019s not your niceness that\u2019s killing your chances with the ladies\u2026 perhaps you need to hone your \u201cedge&#8221;. Your \u201cedge\u201d is all about confidee in yourself and your decisions. Not bragging. Not ego. Just confidence. So, how do you hone your&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":620,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-615","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How To Be A Nice Guy With An Edge - Make Your Relationship Work<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/09\/nice-guy-edge.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How To Be A Nice Guy With An Edge - Make Your Relationship Work\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Do you totally identify with the old saying \u201cnice guys finish last?\u201d Well, maybe it\u2019s not your niceness that\u2019s killing your chances with the ladies\u2026 perhaps you need to hone your \u201cedge&#8221;. Your \u201cedge\u201d is all about confidee in yourself and your decisions. Not bragging. Not ego. Just confidence. So, how do you hone your&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/09\/nice-guy-edge.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Make Your Relationship Work\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-09-25T10:42:55+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2019-09-25T10:45:20+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/files\/2019\/09\/adult-background-casual-941693-300x259.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Alex Wise\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"How To Be A Nice Guy With An Edge - Make Your Relationship Work","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/09\/nice-guy-edge.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"How To Be A Nice Guy With An Edge - Make Your Relationship Work","og_description":"Do you totally identify with the old saying \u201cnice guys finish last?\u201d Well, maybe it\u2019s not your niceness that\u2019s killing your chances with the ladies\u2026 perhaps you need to hone your \u201cedge&#8221;. Your \u201cedge\u201d is all about confidee in yourself and your decisions. Not bragging. Not ego. Just confidence. So, how do you hone your&hellip;","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/09\/nice-guy-edge.html","og_site_name":"Make Your Relationship Work","article_published_time":"2019-09-25T10:42:55+00:00","article_modified_time":"2019-09-25T10:45:20+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/files\/2019\/09\/adult-background-casual-941693-300x259.jpg"}],"author":"Alex Wise","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/09\/nice-guy-edge.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/09\/nice-guy-edge.html","name":"How To Be A Nice Guy With An Edge - Make Your Relationship Work","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/09\/nice-guy-edge.html#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/09\/nice-guy-edge.html#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/files\/2019\/09\/adult-background-casual-941693-300x259.jpg","datePublished":"2019-09-25T10:42:55+00:00","dateModified":"2019-09-25T10:45:20+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/#\/schema\/person\/bb1a6f316ea30c450e6f03a651e64888"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/09\/nice-guy-edge.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/09\/nice-guy-edge.html"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/09\/nice-guy-edge.html#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/files\/2019\/09\/adult-background-casual-941693-300x259.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/files\/2019\/09\/adult-background-casual-941693-300x259.jpg"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2019\/09\/nice-guy-edge.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"How To Be A Nice Guy With An Edge"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/","name":"Make Your Relationship Work","description":"Relationship Improvement, Lifestyle Development, Personal Growth","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/#\/schema\/person\/bb1a6f316ea30c450e6f03a651e64888","name":"Alex Wise","description":"Welcome to my blog. I\u2019m Alex. I\u2019m just a normal guy like any other guy. But what makes me different, is what makes you want to keep your eye out for my blog. I\u2019ve been studying social dynamics and personal development for the last 15 years. I\u2019ve helped men in meeting women. I\u2019ve helped men reaching their goals in life and I\u2019ve helped myself develop the lifestyle that I want. You can learn all that and draw from my experience through my blog. Why should you read this blog? The goal is simply giving you the tools and knowledge in how you can change your life and create the lifestyle that you want. Do you want to improve your dating life? Do you have goals you don\u2019t know how to reach? Do you feel that your life is boring and feel stuck? I will share my years of experience and knowledge in exactly those areas. Areas in the past which I had trouble with too. However I\u2019ve found the key to solving those problems and I\u2019m sharing it all here, so you don\u2019t have to go through years of trial and error like me. What is lifestyle development? Lifestyle development deals with every area of your life whether it\u2019s being relationships, finances, health or personal growth. The blog\u2019s aim is to help you create the amazing lifestyle that you want. Through my blog you will be able to follow my experiences and lessons. Articles and videos aimed to educate and motivate you into taking the necessary steps in getting the life you deserve. I am also a freelance editor and writer for Loveawake.com dating site.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/author\/awise"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/615","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/620"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=615"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/615\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":620,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/615\/revisions\/620"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=615"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=615"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=615"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}