{"id":39,"date":"2018-05-21T10:47:43","date_gmt":"2018-05-21T10:47:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/?p=39"},"modified":"2018-05-21T10:47:43","modified_gmt":"2018-05-21T10:47:43","slug":"stay-friends-ex","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/makeyourrelationshipwork\/2018\/05\/stay-friends-ex.html","title":{"rendered":"How To Stay Friends With Your Ex"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"adult-beard-beverage-551652\"<\/p>\n

While a good handful of relationships end in flames, there\u2019s those that end with a mutual agreement to move on from each other.\u00a0 In some cases both parties recognize that they don\u2019t belong together and decide they may be better just as friends. This brings up the age old question: After all is said and done, is it possible to still be friends with an ex?\u00a0 By defining what is and isn\u2019t appropriate, we\u2019re going to try to get you past that awkward stage and into the\u00a0comfortable friend zone\u00a0.<\/p>\n

DO<\/strong>: Give Yourself Some Space<\/h2>\n

Out of all of our tips this is the most important \u201cDO\u201d.\u00a0 It will provide you the strength to follow the rest of the rules.\u00a0 Upon the initial break-up, don\u2019t try to be chummy right away; it just won\u2019t work.\u00a0 Every piece of your relationship will be so fresh in your mind that you\u2019ll have a difficult time sitting next to them without giving them a kiss, or trying to hold their hand.\u00a0 Save yourself the twist of the knife and give yourself time to get over them.\u00a0 The more time you dedicate to recreating your life post-break up, the more of a chance you\u2019ll have at remaining friends.\u00a0\u00a0Distance yourself, and politely turn down their attempts to see you. \u00a0 Focus on YOU right now and don\u2019t worry about them! \u00a0They\u2019ll still be there when you\u2019re done finding your way.<\/p>\n

DON\u2019T<\/strong>: Feel Hurt When They Move On Too<\/h2>\n

While it\u2019s most likely a bad idea to talk about the new relationship with your ex, don\u2019t be hurt when you find out they\u2019ve started dating somebody else.\u00a0 Remember that there were good reasons that you two broke up, it was not a spur of the moment decision. Don\u2019t draw conclusions or start a nasty rumor about their new person; keep your opinions to yourself.\u00a0 If you share the same group of friends, don\u2019t try to alienate them because that will drive away the friendship you\u2019ve been working at.\u00a0 Suck it up, and take one for the team! \u00a0Who knows, you might even like their new interest! (Crazy, I know.)\u00a0 It seems to work for Bruce Willis and Demi Moore!<\/p>\n

DO:<\/strong>\u00a0Keep Them Posted<\/h2>\n

Just because you two stopped having sex doesn\u2019t mean that you stopped caring for each other.\u00a0 In fact,\u00a0 maintaining a friendship shows that you\u2019re both mature enough to acknowledge the qualities you liked about each other from day one.\u00a0 When the time is right, hang out with them again!\u00a0 The best way would most likely be in a group of mutual friends, and then as you get more comfortable with each other in the friend zone you can move on to hanging out alone.\u00a0 Just be yourself, and remember why you liked them as a person to begin with.\u00a0 When you have exciting news in your life don\u2019t be afraid to share it with them:\u00a0 they\u2019ll appreciate that you still value what they have to say.<\/p>\n

DON\u2019T:<\/strong>\u00a0Make A Move<\/h2>\n

Make sure you never make a move on them.\u00a0 I repeat:\u00a0DO. NOT. HIT. ON. THEM!\u00a0<\/strong>It\u2019s one thing to be friendly, but you don\u2019t want things to fall back into a bitter relationship again. Even if you do get back together the chances of it working out are slim to none.\u00a0 Never forget that the two of you broke up for a reason, and that reason didn\u2019t just go away because you\u2019re friends again.\u00a0 Not to mention, the second break-up is usually even messier than the first one and will kill any chance at friendship\u2026if their ever was one.\u00a0 So do yourself a favor and\u00a0accept the friendship\u00a0for what it is\u2026a friendship. There\u2019s other fish in the sea. So grab a pole, some bait, and start fishin\u2019!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

While a good handful of relationships end in flames, there\u2019s those that end with a mutual agreement to move on from each other.\u00a0 In some cases both parties recognize that they don\u2019t belong together and decide they may be better just as friends. This brings up the age old question: After all is said and…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":620,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[21,20,22,23,12],"class_list":["post-39","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-ex","tag-friends","tag-how-to","tag-howto","tag-relationship"],"yoast_head":"\nHow To Stay Friends With Your Ex - Make Your Relationship Work<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, nofollow\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How To Stay Friends With Your Ex - Make Your Relationship Work\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"While a good handful of relationships end in flames, there\u2019s those that end with a mutual agreement to move on from each other.\u00a0 In some cases both parties recognize that they don\u2019t belong together and decide they may be better just as friends. 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I\u2019m Alex. I\u2019m just a normal guy like any other guy. But what makes me different, is what makes you want to keep your eye out for my blog. I\u2019ve been studying social dynamics and personal development for the last 15 years. I\u2019ve helped men in meeting women. I\u2019ve helped men reaching their goals in life and I\u2019ve helped myself develop the lifestyle that I want. You can learn all that and draw from my experience through my blog. Why should you read this blog? The goal is simply giving you the tools and knowledge in how you can change your life and create the lifestyle that you want. Do you want to improve your dating life? Do you have goals you don\u2019t know how to reach? Do you feel that your life is boring and feel stuck? I will share my years of experience and knowledge in exactly those areas. Areas in the past which I had trouble with too. 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