{"id":1227,"date":"2012-12-03T12:12:04","date_gmt":"2012-12-03T17:12:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lifeasaconsciousmom\/?p=1227"},"modified":"2012-12-03T13:48:46","modified_gmt":"2012-12-03T18:48:46","slug":"please-dont-use-santa-as-a-threat","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lifeasaconsciousmom\/2012\/12\/03\/please-dont-use-santa-as-a-threat\/","title":{"rendered":"Please Don’t Use Santa As A Threat"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>I love this time of year. I love the excitement and the good cheer and the decorating. But there is one thing I don\u2019t love and that’s hearing parents use Santa as a threat. I heard it yesterday, \u2018you better be good, or Santa won\u2019t bring you anything.\u2019<\/p>\n

That\u2019s one thing we have been very conscious to not do with Caidin and here\u2019s why. Whether we are aware of it or not, kids put a lot of pressure on themselves to do the right thing. Sometimes it\u2019s hard, but the pressure to do right or to be good is always there. Christmas is supposed to be a time of love, gratitude, generosity and giving. To use Santa as a behavioral modification makes Santa the \u2018bad guy\u2019 and he is anything but.<\/p>\n

We have taught Caidin that Santa is the Spirit of giving. When Caidin would do something \u2018bad\u2019 around Christmas time he would always turn to me and say \u2018is Santa still going to come?\u2019 and I would say \u2018of course.\u2019 Caidin would question me about \u2018Santa not coming\u2019 and I would always tell him that parents use Santa as way to try to make their kids be good and he\u2019d say \u2018that\u2019s not right.\u2019 I don\u2019t know about right or wrong, but I don\u2019t think it\u2019s healthy nor is it honest.<\/p>\n

I believe in honesty with kids. I\u2019ve talked about this before. Kids have an internal \u2018truth-o-meter\u2019 and when we tell a lie, somewhere they know that, but they want to trust us because we are their parents, so in turn they dismiss what they internally know to be true. In the end when we lie to our kids, out and out or even white lies, we teach them to not trust their own information. So if you are using Santa as a threat, you better be prepared to nix the gifts if your kids are bad. \u00a0Not only does this ring as untrue, it becomes a hollow threat, which sends an equally dangerous message to your child – threats hold no consequences.<\/p>\n

I think Santa and Christmas are a wonderful time of year. If you use Santa as a threat, or your family members like to, see if you can find a more effective way of encouraging good behavior. I find positive reinforcement is the best way to elicit good behavior.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s to a happy and loving Christmas.<\/p>\n

(C) 2012 Christine Agro<\/p>\n

Christine Agro is the founder of The Conscious Mom’s Guide<\/a>, a free membership site designed to support conscious parenting. Christine is a world renowned speaker, clairvoyant and healer who has been helping people live life consciously since 1999. She applies her metaphysical insight to all stages and phases of life, including pre-conception, pregnancy and parenting, in an effort to help parents and to support children in remaining conscious.<\/p>\n

Join Christine for her upcoming tele-class: The Spiritual Side of Parenting<\/a>. This is a four week course begining January 8th \u00a0in which Christine will share her insight into why our children are in our lives, how to interact with them consciously and how to support them in living conscious lives.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I love this time of year. I love the excitement and the good cheer and the decorating. But there is one thing I don\u2019t love and that’s hearing parents use Santa as a threat. 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She has been interviewed on radio shows around the world, quoted in health and consumer magazines and e-zines nationwide and she is the founder of The Conscious Mom\u2019s Guide website. \u2022 Christine enjoys supporting women in all stages and phases of life. \u2022 Christine sees the power of today\u2019s children and seeks to support them in retaining their inner light. \u2022 She believes in living life passionately and purposefully. \u2022 She believes in the body\u2019s natural ability to heal and supporting that ability. \u2022 She believes children are conscious beings who have an unlimited capacity to understand and learn. \u2022 She believes children should be treated with respect and given the support and guidance to help them understand the world they have chosen to live in. \u2022 She believes all relationships offer us insight into what we want to learn and heal this lifetime. \u2022 She believes we all have the power to live a passionate and purposeful life. 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