{"id":1033,"date":"2012-09-25T12:42:41","date_gmt":"2012-09-25T16:42:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lifeasaconsciousmom\/?p=1033"},"modified":"2012-09-25T12:43:10","modified_gmt":"2012-09-25T16:43:10","slug":"can-you-accept-your-child-for-who-they-are","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lifeasaconsciousmom\/2012\/09\/25\/can-you-accept-your-child-for-who-they-are\/","title":{"rendered":"Can You Accept Your Child For Who They Are?"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>On Sunday, I posted on The Conscious Mom’s Guide Facebook Page<\/a> a powerful piece written by Gabriel Arana, web editor at American Prospect. It was a personal piece called \u2018My So Called Ex-Gay Life<\/a>\u2019 and in it he shared his experience of trying to \u2018not be gay\u2019.<\/p>\n

I posted this piece because it speaks, so powerfully, to our conscious responsibility as parents to embrace who are children are, whether that’s their sexual orientation, emotional expression, intelligence, physical appearance or any other aspect of who they inherently are.<\/p>\n

How many parents try to get their kids to be someone other than who they are? Maybe because they feel it will be too hard to live life as the shy kid, or the loud kid, or the dramatic kid or the gay kid. Or maybe it\u2019s because they themselves can\u2019t imagine \u2018going through life like that\u2019, or maybe it\u2019s because their sensibilities just can\u2019t embrace the personality or choices of their child.<\/p>\n

Kids want to be accepted and when a parent demonstrates that their child\u2019s own behavior, beliefs or approach to life is not acceptable, they, the child, will either try to conform or they will rebel, but either way they will be left to deal with the awareness that who they are is not \u2018O.K.\u2019 in the eyes of the people who love them the most.<\/p>\n

The opportunity we have as parents is to see who are children are and to help them embrace all that they are. In whoever they are, and however they show up, if as parents we have concerns or worry for their well-being or their ability to \u2018fit\u2019 into the world, then it is our job to help strengthen them and to support them, not to make them change. Because in trying to make them change, all we succeed in doing is teaching them that how they feel, what they think and how they are comfortable living is wrong.<\/p>\n

For example if your child is shy, we shouldn\u2019t make them feel bad or uncomfortable or wrong for being quiet, we should help them find the strength in that and to celebrate that. Maybe the child who is perceived as shy or quiet is actually discerning and thoughtful. So rather than saying ‘my child is shy,’ we can say ‘my child needs to take in everything before she engages.’ \u00a0This is a much more validating and positive statement for any child to hear. In the same vein, maybe the child who is loud isn\u2019t unaware of others, but he just has exuberance for life and living. Maybe the child who loves to entertain isn\u2019t looking for attention but really loves to make people laugh and loves to see them happy.<\/p>\n

It is our own programming, issues and stigma that we carry that makes us see our children through anything other than loving eyes. If you worry about your child\u2019s behavior try to understand what motivates your child. If you worry about who your child is, look at what makes you worry.<\/p>\n

If we want our children to love who they are, it helps if we love who they are first.<\/p>\n

\u00a9 2012 Christine Agro<\/p>\n

Have friends who will benefit from this information? Use the handy share options provided at the top of the article . You\u2019ll find Facebook, Twitter, Google +1, Email or click the \u2018share\u2019 for many, many other options.<\/p>\n

Remember, join me at\u00a0The Conscious Mom\u2019s Guide<\/a>\u00a0for more insight, guidance and to connect with a growing group of conscious parents.<\/p>\n

Have questions about your child or need support? Christine offers\u00a0private readings<\/a>\u00a0as well as on-line support at\u00a0The Consicous Mom\u2019s Guide<\/a><\/p>\n

Christine Agro is a Clairvoyant, Naturopath, Master Herbalist, Conscious Mom and Author of 50 Ways to Live Life Consciously as well as of The Conscious Living Wisdom Cards (Special Moms\u2019 Edition). Christine is founder of The Conscious Mom\u2019s Guide , a membership site where she helps support you on your own journey of living life consciously and on your journey of being a Conscious parent. You can also join Christine on\u00a0Facebook<\/a>. To contact Christine, invite her to speak or to schedule an appointment with her please\u00a0email<\/a>\u00a0her.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

On Sunday, I posted on The Conscious Mom’s Guide Facebook Page a powerful piece written by Gabriel Arana, web editor at American Prospect. It was a personal piece called \u2018My So Called Ex-Gay Life\u2019 and in it he shared his experience of trying to \u2018not be gay\u2019. 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She has been interviewed on radio shows around the world, quoted in health and consumer magazines and e-zines nationwide and she is the founder of The Conscious Mom\u2019s Guide website. \u2022 Christine enjoys supporting women in all stages and phases of life. \u2022 Christine sees the power of today\u2019s children and seeks to support them in retaining their inner light. \u2022 She believes in living life passionately and purposefully. \u2022 She believes in the body\u2019s natural ability to heal and supporting that ability. \u2022 She believes children are conscious beings who have an unlimited capacity to understand and learn. \u2022 She believes children should be treated with respect and given the support and guidance to help them understand the world they have chosen to live in. \u2022 She believes all relationships offer us insight into what we want to learn and heal this lifetime. \u2022 She believes we all have the power to live a passionate and purposeful life. 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