{"id":1862,"date":"2012-09-05T03:00:56","date_gmt":"2012-09-05T07:00:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lettinggo\/?p=1862"},"modified":"2012-09-02T12:43:27","modified_gmt":"2012-09-02T16:43:27","slug":"on-the-road-to-being-real","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/2012\/09\/on-the-road-to-being-real.html","title":{"rendered":"On the Road to Being Real"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>Question:<\/strong> I have all the &#8220;right&#8221; books and audio materials. I know what I need to do, but I don&#8217;t! Why? Its like I&#8217;m frozen, and its killing me; yet I have no trouble partaking in my self-destructive behaviors. Why? Any insights would be greatly appreciated.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Answer:<\/strong> You have reached a vital point along the path to authentic self-liberation: the great divide that exists between what a person knows versus what he or she is capable of doing with that knowledge. As you&#8217;re beginning to see, anyone can grow flowers while the sun shines; its another story altogether when it comes to acting from the light of what one knows is true to do in moments of darkness. Saint Paul went through this same stage, and he reported on it with words to this effect: &#8220;I don&#8217;t do the good I want to do, instead I do the evil I don&#8217;t want to do!&#8221; So, you see, little comfort though it may be, you&#8217;re not alone.<\/p>\n<p>The reason that the &#8220;truth sets us free&#8221; isn&#8217;t so much because of something that we&#8217;re able to &#8220;do&#8221; with it &#8212; with regards to trying to &#8220;fix&#8221; or control what&#8217;s wrecking us, or holding us back &#8212; but rather through the always shocking discovery that, as we are at present, there is very little we can do that is real; and by &#8220;real&#8221; I mean act in such a way that we no longer harm ourselves or others without knowing it.<\/p>\n<p>And to paraphrase your question &#8212; &#8220;what can I do to get unstuck and stop destroying my own happiness?&#8221; &#8212; you&#8217;ve already seen the answer; you just don&#8217;t want to see the truth of it for fear it means you&#8217;ll be stuck with some kind of suffering forever. The only place any of us get stuck is in the world of resistance&#8230; of not wanting whatever it may be we fear about our self and its &#8220;life.&#8221; It&#8217;s very hard to see, but resistance is a form of attachment. But once this understanding dawns in us, as it must if we persist with our wish to be free, we stop fighting with ourselves to become something imagined. This also ends the disappointment we feel over what we have failed to become. Then we begin the real interior work of attending to the &#8220;self&#8221; that invariably traps itself in a world of its own unconscious wants (and not wants). It is only in dying to this self that we are liberated from doing its bidding; what remains can&#8217;t act against itself or another.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Question: I have all the &#8220;right&#8221; books and audio materials. I know what I need to do, but I don&#8217;t! Why? Its like I&#8217;m frozen, and its killing me; yet I have no trouble partaking in my self-destructive behaviors. Why? Any insights would be greatly appreciated. Answer: You have reached a vital point along the&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":232,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[672,499],"tags":[1324,70,254,21,1323],"class_list":["post-1862","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-changetransformation","category-healthy-living","tag-do-no-harm","tag-happiness","tag-health","tag-resistance","tag-self-destructive-behavior"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>On the Road to Being Real   - Letting Go with Guy Finley<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/2012\/09\/on-the-road-to-being-real.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"On the Road to Being Real   - Letting Go with Guy Finley\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Question: I have all the &#8220;right&#8221; books and audio materials. I know what I need to do, but I don&#8217;t! Why? Its like I&#8217;m frozen, and its killing me; yet I have no trouble partaking in my self-destructive behaviors. Why? Any insights would be greatly appreciated. Answer: You have reached a vital point along the&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/2012\/09\/on-the-road-to-being-real.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Letting Go with Guy Finley\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Guy-Finley-260924340633\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2012-09-05T07:00:56+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2012-09-02T16:43:27+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Guy Finley\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@guy_finley\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"On the Road to Being Real   - Letting Go with Guy Finley","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/2012\/09\/on-the-road-to-being-real.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"On the Road to Being Real   - Letting Go with Guy Finley","og_description":"Question: I have all the &#8220;right&#8221; books and audio materials. I know what I need to do, but I don&#8217;t! Why? Its like I&#8217;m frozen, and its killing me; yet I have no trouble partaking in my self-destructive behaviors. Why? Any insights would be greatly appreciated. Answer: You have reached a vital point along the&hellip;","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/2012\/09\/on-the-road-to-being-real.html","og_site_name":"Letting Go with Guy Finley","article_author":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Guy-Finley-260924340633\/","article_published_time":"2012-09-05T07:00:56+00:00","article_modified_time":"2012-09-02T16:43:27+00:00","author":"Guy Finley","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@guy_finley","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/2012\/09\/on-the-road-to-being-real.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/2012\/09\/on-the-road-to-being-real.html","name":"On the Road to Being Real - Letting Go with Guy Finley","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/#website"},"datePublished":"2012-09-05T07:00:56+00:00","dateModified":"2012-09-02T16:43:27+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/#\/schema\/person\/1e80afed42f91bae3eb4ca59666c1d16"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/2012\/09\/on-the-road-to-being-real.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/2012\/09\/on-the-road-to-being-real.html"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/2012\/09\/on-the-road-to-being-real.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"On the Road to Being Real"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/","name":"Letting Go with Guy Finley","description":"Holistic, Mental Health and Emotional Wellness","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/#\/schema\/person\/1e80afed42f91bae3eb4ca59666c1d16","name":"Guy Finley","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/308\/3082f4cd4990377da62358c5c69fd4e1x96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/308\/3082f4cd4990377da62358c5c69fd4e1x96.jpg","caption":"Guy Finley"},"description":"Bestselling \"Letting Go\" author Guy Finley's encouraging and accessible message is one of the true bright lights in our world today. His ideas cut straight to the heart of our most important personal and social issues - relationships, success, addiction, stress, peace, happiness, freedom - and lead the way to a higher life. Finley is the Founder and Director of Life of Learning Foundation, a nonprofit Center for Spiritual Discovery. He is the acclaimed author of \"The Secret of Letting Go\" and more than 45 other books and audio programs that have sold over two million copies in 26 languages worldwide. His work is widely endorsed by doctors, business professionals, celebrities, and religious leaders of all denominations. Through Life of Learning Foundation, Guy has presented over 5,000 unique self-realization seminars to thousands of grateful students throughout North America and Europe over the past 20 years and has been a guest on over 700 television and radio shows, including national appearances on ABC, NBC, CBS, CNN, and NPR. The Foundation's popular Key Lesson e-mails featuring inspirational quotes by Guy are read each week by a hundred thousand subscribers in 142 countries. Guy speaks four times each week on inner-life principles at Life of Learning Foundation's home in Merlin, Oregon. These meetings are ongoing and open to the public. For more information about Life of Learning Foundation, Guy Finley, and their life-changing messages, visit guyfinley.org. \"Guy Finley is...one of the leading experts at the forefront of human potential.\" -Nightingale Conant \"Guy Finley has helped millions live fuller, more peaceable lives.\" -Barnes and Noble","sameAs":["http:\/\/www.guyfinley.org","https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Guy-Finley-260924340633\/","https:\/\/x.com\/guy_finley"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/author\/gfinley"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1862","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/232"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1862"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1862\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1863,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1862\/revisions\/1863"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1862"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1862"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lettinggo\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1862"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}