{"id":64,"date":"2009-10-16T23:14:00","date_gmt":"2009-10-16T23:14:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/10\/saying-yes-to-spontaneity.html"},"modified":"2009-10-16T23:14:00","modified_gmt":"2009-10-16T23:14:00","slug":"saying-yes-to-spontaneity","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/10\/saying-yes-to-spontaneity.html","title":{"rendered":"Saying \u201cYes\u201d to Spontaneity"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/Stk3OrOK_QI\/AAAAAAAABEw\/ixEF5U8OXCc\/s1600-h\/Photo+8.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" style=\"margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt;float: left;cursor: pointer;width: 200px;height: 150px\" src=\"https:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/Stk3OrOK_QI\/AAAAAAAABEw\/ixEF5U8OXCc\/s200\/Photo+8.jpg\" alt=\"\" border=\"0\" \/><\/a>I\u2019ve always considered myself a spontaneous kind of girl. It sounds good to think I am! But lately I\u2019ve been so immersed in writing books that I try to keep a tight schedule. Last minute invites were automatically turned down as my time was already planned. If my intention was to write, that was what I did. I realized that this spontaneous kind of girl had lost her spontaneity, and I didn\u2019t like that!<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Until this week\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n<p>It wasn\u2019t planned, that\u2019s for sure, but since last weekend I\u2019ve been making up for lost spontaneous time. It began with a decision to do more to actively nurture myself. I knew I needed some spiritual and energy boosts. I\u2019ve been tired lately trying to do too much in too little time. It\u2019s kept me hibernating as I try to make my deadlines. And write the posts for this blog! I felt like I was losing part of me in the process and had to change that.<\/p>\n<p>Last week I called the church where Louise Hay got her ministry. It\u2019s not too far from my place and I wanted to know if they carried a book in their bookstore. \u201cBy chance,\u201d the head minister answered. Everyone else had stepped out for a minute. He answered my question and then we had a nice chat about how much I\u2019d learned about manifesting from the ministers there.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">He mentioned the theme of this months Sunday lessons.<\/span> It sounded interesting and he asked if I was coming.<\/p>\n<p>Maybe, I said, though I was thinking, I hate to go out on Sunday morning, especially when it\u2019s cold. That\u2019s a day I laze around, catch up on emails, watch news shows and mindless ones on MTV, etc. I thought about it Saturday night and considered how nice it would be to go to the service. Nicer if I could go without having to get dressed and go outside to be there! I still considered it when I woke up Sunday. I decided my reasons for not going were lame. A good spiritual shot of inspiration would be good for me. So at the last minute, I went!<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Spontaneously pushing yourself out of a lazy habit or automatic negative response can bring very positive rewards.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>The service was wonderful and an extra treat was afterwards, we all got to speak individually to a practitioner. I really enjoyed that, after reveling in all the good energy during the service. People shook hands and greeted each other. Warmth abounded. I got motivated and left with a big smile and gratitude that I had made that spontaneous move.<\/p>\n<p>Hmmmm\u2026. Was the spontaneous kind of girl returning?<\/p>\n<p>On Wednesday I went to a meeting for a committee I volunteer for. I had noon and 3:30 appointments so I was anxious to get back to my writing. But after the meeting, Jan Goldstoff, the publicist with the golden rolodex, asked me to have coffee with her. Though we\u2019d been on the committee together for a year, we\u2019d wanted to get to know each other better.<\/p>\n<p>This wasn\u2019t a good time for me but after hesitating, <span style=\"font-weight: bold\">the newly resurrected spontaneous kind of girl agreed<\/span>, and it was delightful.<\/p>\n<p>Jan called me the next day just before 5PM to invite me to her ch\u2019i kung class at 6. She raved about the teacher and insisted I\u2019d really enjoy it. I was very tired and it was a miserable day. The weathermen used Nor&#8217;Easter in their forecast. The class was downtown. I couldn\u2019t stop yawning. So I said maybe. But I didn\u2019t want to leave my warm, dry apartment. Jan encouraged me. I thought about it. Since I\u2019d vowed to do more to nurture my spirit and energy, I agreed to go, and had to hustle to get dressed, catch a train downtown and make it on time.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Sometimes you have to dig deep into self-love to stimulate your spontaneity.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>I enjoyed my hour doing ch\u2019i kung with instructor Paul Bloom. He walked us through gentle movements to relax, detoxify the body and increase energy. Ch\u2019i kung is easy to do yet the benefits are many. I felt more relaxed and a bit more energized than the sleepy girl was when I left home. Jan and Paul were amazed that I\u2019d spontaneously got dressed, jumped on the subway and came to the class with little notice. I left feeling revved that I\u2019d done this to nurture me.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">To enjoy life to the fullest, it\u2019s important to be open to spontaneous activities. Otherwise, you can miss out on some of life\u2019s wonderful blessings.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Today I came full circle. My actual first spontaneous move was when I saw a report on the news 2 weeks ago about Spa week in NY. This week many spas have a special price for select treatments. They showed someone getting a Thai massage at Erika Bloom Pilates Plus. I\u2019ve always wanted one and without missing a beat, I called and made an appointment for today, with Brynne Billingsley, who I saw on TV.<\/p>\n<p>Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026.<\/p>\n<p>Brynne gave me one of the best massages I\u2019ve ever had. I didn\u2019t know exactly what Thai massage was and thought it was just a series of stretching but oh, it\u2019s so much more. Brynne spent a lot of time working my energy lines on my legs, and worked my body from toes to head. Energy points, sore muscles, everything got attention. She\u2019s small but very strong. I like a hard massage and that\u2019s what I got. I could have asked her to go easy but know that the pressure that creates the pain will work its magic in my body after.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">I thought about John Cougar Mellencamp\u2019s \u201cHurts So Good!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p>This week I became spontaneously nurturing from love\u2014self-love! I needed to get refreshed and jumped at opportunities to do so. Next time you\u2019re about to turn down an invitation or opportunity that you might benefit from but it\u2019s last minute, think before you turn it down. Spontaneity brings many rewards. Doing things that are fun or nurturing increases smiles.<\/p>\n<p>And smiles stimulate serotonin, which makes you feel good. So try being a bit more spontaneous. Find more reasons to smile. <span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Give yourself some spiritual and energy boosts.<\/span> Find ways to nurture you. When I was a DoorMat, I nurtured everyone but me. This is a whole other level of MUCH BETTER! Try it. <span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Self-love grows when you give yourself attention.<\/span> I know, because I used to hate myself and now that\u2019s changed 1000% as I love myself more each day.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">There\u2019s nothing more glorious than loving yourself and self-nurturing helps get you there!<\/span> If you have to be spontaneous to do that, it&#8217;s well worth it!<\/p>\n<p>If you enjoyed my post, please leave a comment and\/or click on the bookmark and write a short review at some of the sites, especially Stumbleupon and Digg. Thanks!<br \/><!-- AddThis Bookmark Button BEGIN --><br \/><a href=\"http:\/\/www.addthis.com\/bookmark.php\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/s9.addthis.com\/button1-bm.gif\" alt=\"AddThis Social Bookmark Button\" border=\"0\" height=\"16\" width=\"125\" \/><\/a> var addthis_pub = &#8216;wryter&#8217;;<br \/><!-- AddThis Bookmark Button END --><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I\u2019ve always considered myself a spontaneous kind of girl. It sounds good to think I am! But lately I\u2019ve been so immersed in writing books that I try to keep a tight schedule. Last minute invites were automatically turned down as my time was already planned. If my intention was to write, that was what&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":83,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-64","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nice-people-can-finish-first"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Saying \u201cYes\u201d to Spontaneity - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/10\/saying-yes-to-spontaneity.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Saying \u201cYes\u201d to Spontaneity - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I\u2019ve always considered myself a spontaneous kind of girl. It sounds good to think I am! But lately I\u2019ve been so immersed in writing books that I try to keep a tight schedule. Last minute invites were automatically turned down as my time was already planned. 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Let Me Count the Ways, a She's appeared on hundreds of TV and radio shows, including Oprah, Howard Stern, and Good Morning America and has been quoted in dozens of publications, including the New York Times, Chicago Sun-Times, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Marie Claire, and Men\u00b9s Health. After being a consummate People Pleaser who felt unworthy of getting her own needs met for many years, Daylle found a path of self-love that enabled her to build her self-esteem and reinvent herself into a dual career. She learned to get taken seriously without being overtly assertive when she became one of the first women to start an independent record label (on a dare!) and learned to play ball nicely and successfully in an industry dominated by men. To help independent musicians empower themselves, Daylle writes music business books for Billboard\/Random House, including the very popular Start &amp; Run Your Own Record Labe and I Don't Need a Record Deal! Daylle's books have been translated into over 10 languages and are popular around the world. She speaks for colleges, organizations and corporations. Through her company, Project Self-Empowerment, Daylle creates programs and materials to help people empower themselves. One goal is to raise the money to self-publish her book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways and give it away for free in colleges and through organizations, to give thanks for all her blessings. Daylle uses her writing and speaking to help others find the kind of contentment and empowerment that she has.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/author\/dschwartz"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/64","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/83"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=64"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/64\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=64"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=64"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=64"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}