{"id":5362,"date":"2014-03-13T12:01:06","date_gmt":"2014-03-13T16:01:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/?p=5362"},"modified":"2014-03-03T17:26:43","modified_gmt":"2014-03-03T22:26:43","slug":"from-march-madness-to-happiness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2014\/03\/from-march-madness-to-happiness.html","title":{"rendered":"From March Madness to Happiness"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Jaime<\/a>It\u2019s been a long winter for many of us. I\u2019m sick of being cooped up because of snowstorms and frigid temperatures. As the March weather gets better, there will be a lot of catching up to do. I think women can feel it more as we try tp juggle work, family andand household issues, as we strive to be SuperWomen. But it\u2019s important not to run yourself ragged as March madness unfolds. That\u2019s why I\u2019m thrilled to have Jaime Kulaga<\/strong><\/a>, Ph.D., LMHC author of Type \u2018S\u2019uperWoman \u2013 Finding the Work-Life Balance: A Self-Searching Book for Women<\/strong><\/a>,\u00a0 as my guest today.<\/p>\n

Motivated by watching those she coaches become successful and with a true passion for helping others, Dr. Kulaga earned her bachelor\u2019s degree in psychology, and master\u2019s and doctorate\u2019s in counseling. As a licensed mental health counselor and certified professional coach, she has a special interest in the complex lives of today\u2019s women. Even guys can learn from her lesson or help the woman in their lives.<\/p>\n

Tips for Turning Your Personal March Madness \u2028into March Happiness\u2028<\/strong>
\nBy: Jaime Kulaga<\/a>, Ph.D., LMHC<\/strong><\/p>\n

There\u2019s a lot of hype about March MADness, and if you\u2019re an NCAA fan (or m\"Jaime<\/a>arried to one) you know it well. But I\u2019d rather think in terms of March Happiness; training mind and body, just as those basketball players train, to remain positive even when faced with stress, sadness and the cyclicality of life. You can create a habit of happiness.<\/p>\n

During March Madness, 68 teams in the College Basketball Association compete the national championship. Sixty-eight teams, one month, 12,000 games \u2013 or that\u2019s what it feels like to me.<\/p>\n

All those teams are vying for that one feel-good moment they\u2019ve worked so hard to achieve. They\u2019ve dedicated a large portion of their lives to training body and mind, and when the final two teams compete, one team, each team member, and thousands of fans experience fulfillment and happiness.
\nThis March, compete against yourself. Train your mind and body to be healthier and happier than ever before. At this point in the game, you may feel the odds are against you. About 40 percent of people who set New Year\u2019s Resolutions have already quit trying. But this month, you are powering up, not gearing down.<\/p>\n

You can do it. Here are my TOP 3 Tips for being happy in March and all year long:<\/p>\n

Smile and Wave Goodbye to the Toxic People<\/strong>: Waving goodbye has never made you smile so big. In a world where everyone faces uncontrollable stressors and negativity every day (no matter how happy of a person you are), you must get rid of the things and people that are only going to bring you further down. Rid yourself of the toxic people in your life, the haters and the hurters. Take control of your happiness by not allowing others to steer your emotions up and down, or steal them altogether. If you can\u2019t completely rid yourself of the negative people, you can definitely set boundaries to minimize your interactions with them. Saying goodbye means saying hello to happiness.<\/p>\n

Take Time to Decide<\/strong>: The best way to be unhappy is to go around making promises or commitments you can\u2019t live up to or, if you do live up to them, you despise every moment of it. You get one life, so make it a happy one. Don\u2019t over commit to someone else and then under commit to yourself. Your happiness is just as important as everyone else\u2019s, and don\u2019t think otherwise.
\nWhen you make an impulsive decision, it is typically based on intense emotions and made with little thought. In most cases, quick decisions are not only poor decisions, they also reduce your control and even ruin your credibility.<\/p>\n

To create happiness, make a habit of taking time when making both large and small decisions. Retreat, Rethink, React are your new decision-making steps, in that order.<\/p>\n

Forgive<\/strong>: When you hold grudges, possess anger or find yourself always looking backward, it is hard to move forward. The great thing about forgiveness is you don\u2019t have to feel it, you just do it. And you are doing it for you, not the other person. If you are angry with someone, your attention and energy is given to them, not you. You can\u2019t control your past, and that can be upsetting sometimes. But you can control your future, and you can drive right up to happiness.<\/p>\n

As you compete against yourself in March, you must dedicate a portion of your life to training your body and mind. This takes time and commitment. Remember that you are competing for one thing — that feel-good moment when you notice more days seem brighter; when you notice the win. It not only lies within you, but within your family (team) and all those who you interact with (fans).
\nThis March, turn your Madness into Happiness.
\n*************<\/p>\n

Join The Self-Love Movement\u2122!<\/strong><\/a> Take the 31 Days of Self-Love Commitment<\/strong><\/a>—\u201cI commit to do my best to do something loving for myself, however big or small, for the next 31 days<\/strong>.<\/strong>\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways<\/a><\/strong> for free at http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com<\/a><\/strong>. Read my 2014 31 Days of Self-Love Posts HERE<\/strong><\/a>. Join the Self-Love Movement\u2122<\/strong><\/a>! on Facebook<\/strong><\/a>. Watch the video<\/strong><\/a> made with Hoobastank’s song–The reason–that illustrates the power of self-love.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It\u2019s been a long winter for many of us. I\u2019m sick of being cooped up because of snowstorms and frigid temperatures. As the March weather gets better, there will be a lot of catching up to do. 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Let Me Count the Ways, a She's appeared on hundreds of TV and radio shows, including Oprah, Howard Stern, and Good Morning America and has been quoted in dozens of publications, including the New York Times, Chicago Sun-Times, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Marie Claire, and Men\u00b9s Health. After being a consummate People Pleaser who felt unworthy of getting her own needs met for many years, Daylle found a path of self-love that enabled her to build her self-esteem and reinvent herself into a dual career. She learned to get taken seriously without being overtly assertive when she became one of the first women to start an independent record label (on a dare!) and learned to play ball nicely and successfully in an industry dominated by men. To help independent musicians empower themselves, Daylle writes music business books for Billboard\/Random House, including the very popular Start & Run Your Own Record Labe and I Don't Need a Record Deal! Daylle's books have been translated into over 10 languages and are popular around the world. She speaks for colleges, organizations and corporations. Through her company, Project Self-Empowerment, Daylle creates programs and materials to help people empower themselves. One goal is to raise the money to self-publish her book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways and give it away for free in colleges and through organizations, to give thanks for all her blessings. 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