{"id":5181,"date":"2014-01-20T12:01:29","date_gmt":"2014-01-20T17:01:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/?p=5181"},"modified":"2014-01-18T18:54:56","modified_gmt":"2014-01-18T23:54:56","slug":"why-its-fun-to-be-perfectly-imperfect","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2014\/01\/why-its-fun-to-be-perfectly-imperfect.html","title":{"rendered":"Why It\u2019s Fun to Be Perfectly Imperfect"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/files\/2012\/12\/Self-Love-logo.png\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-3701\" alt=\"Self-Love logo\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/91\/2012\/12\/Self-Love-logo-300x64.png\" width=\"480\" height=\"89\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p><em>Today is Day 20 of my 31 Days of Self-Love posts to celebrate <strong><a href=\"http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com\/\">Self-Love Month<\/a><\/strong> with suggestions for jump-starting your own self-love and joining <a href=\"http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com\/\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>The Self-Love Movement<\/strong><\/a>\u2122.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Perfection. So many of us are taught that we should strive for that impossible standard. In my DoorMat days I thought I had to be perfect to please everyone. And because I couldn\u2019t be perfect all the time, I tried harder to please. And it made me feel like I wasn\u2019t good enough to receive good stuff.<\/p>\n<p>As I began to love myself, I recognized that it was self-loving to cut myself slack when I made a mistake or didn\u2019t do something perfectly. I accepted that always being perfect is impossible. I always accepted flaws in my friends so why not be my own best friend and accept them in me?<\/p>\n<p>Now I relax when I make a mistake or don\u2019t so something perfectly, I laugh, say \u201cOops!\u201d or remind myself that I\u00a0tried my best and that\u2019s all I can do. Beating yourself up for not being perfect is unloving since it makes you feel bad. Allowing the imperfections to happen without stress is a form of self-forgiveness, which says, \u201cI love me!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Doing things without the pressure of needing to be perfect allows you to enjoy life more. You can laugh at your oops moments. And have fun doing things you enjoy, without having to do them well.<\/p>\n<p>For example, when I began to run in the park, my muscles would be uncomfortably tight after, because I pushed myself to keep going like everyone else did. I thought that if I ran I should do it \u201cright.\u201d What did that mean? I shouldn\u2019t stop and take stretching breaks to help my muscles. After a while I hated running because I was in so much pain after. I thought I\u2019d be embarrassed to take stretching breaks.<\/p>\n<p>When I let go of the need to be perfect, I decided to resume running, but not perfectly. I have le spots to stop with posts to use for stretching. I realized that nobody I cared about would judge me. Other runner didn\u2019t care if I stopped to stretch. People I know aren\u2019t there when I do it. This time I enjoy my imperfect runs, since I love getting my exercise in Central Park and no longer care how I do it.<\/p>\n<p>Not worrying about being perfect is fun! And self-loving, since it\u2019s accepting yourself as imperfect, which everyone is. It allows you to do things your way. Being perfectly imperfect means, you can stop trying so hard and relax, and laugh at your imperfections. I love being able to laugh when I goof, instead of beating myself up.\u00a0 Being perfectly imperfect allows you to be comfortable being yourself, not trying to live up to other people\u2019s expectations. That\u2019s a self-loving life!<br \/>\n*************<\/p>\n<p>Join <a href=\"http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>The Self-Love Movement\u2122!<\/strong><\/a> Take the <a href=\"http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com\/the-pledge\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>31 Days of Self-Love Commitment<\/strong><\/a>&#8212;<strong>\u201cI commit to do my best to do something loving for myself, however big or small, for <strong><strong>the next 31 days<\/strong>.<\/strong>\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0and get my book, <strong><a href=\"http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com\/the-book\" target=\"_blank\">How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways<\/a><\/strong> for free at <strong><a href=\"http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com\/\">http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com<\/a><\/strong>. Read my 2013 31 Days of Self-Love Posts <a href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/02\/3961.html\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>HERE<\/strong><\/a>. Join the <a href=\"http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>Self-Love Movement\u2122<\/strong><\/a>! on <a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/TheSelfLoveMovement\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>Facebook<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Today is Day 20 of my 31 Days of Self-Love posts to celebrate Self-Love Month with suggestions for jump-starting your own self-love and joining The Self-Love Movement\u2122. Perfection. So many of us are taught that we should strive for that impossible standard. In my DoorMat days I thought I had to be perfect to please&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":83,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[14,15],"tags":[709,692,579,27],"class_list":["post-5181","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-positive-mental-attitude","category-self-love-acceptance","tag-beating-yourself-up","tag-making-mistakes","tag-perfection","tag-self-love"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Why It\u2019s Fun to Be Perfectly Imperfect - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, nofollow\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Why It\u2019s Fun to Be Perfectly Imperfect - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Today is Day 20 of my 31 Days of Self-Love posts to celebrate Self-Love Month with suggestions for jump-starting your own self-love and joining The Self-Love Movement\u2122. Perfection. So many of us are taught that we should strive for that impossible standard. In my DoorMat days I thought I had to be perfect to please&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2014\/01\/why-its-fun-to-be-perfectly-imperfect.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2014-01-20T17:01:29+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2014-01-18T23:54:56+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/files\/2012\/12\/Self-Love-logo-300x64.png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Daylle Deanna Schwartz\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Why It\u2019s Fun to Be Perfectly Imperfect - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","robots":{"index":"noindex","follow":"nofollow"},"og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Why It\u2019s Fun to Be Perfectly Imperfect - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","og_description":"Today is Day 20 of my 31 Days of Self-Love posts to celebrate Self-Love Month with suggestions for jump-starting your own self-love and joining The Self-Love Movement\u2122. Perfection. So many of us are taught that we should strive for that impossible standard. In my DoorMat days I thought I had to be perfect to please&hellip;","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2014\/01\/why-its-fun-to-be-perfectly-imperfect.html","og_site_name":"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","article_published_time":"2014-01-20T17:01:29+00:00","article_modified_time":"2014-01-18T23:54:56+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/files\/2012\/12\/Self-Love-logo-300x64.png"}],"author":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2014\/01\/why-its-fun-to-be-perfectly-imperfect.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2014\/01\/why-its-fun-to-be-perfectly-imperfect.html","name":"Why It\u2019s Fun to Be Perfectly Imperfect - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2014\/01\/why-its-fun-to-be-perfectly-imperfect.html#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2014\/01\/why-its-fun-to-be-perfectly-imperfect.html#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/files\/2012\/12\/Self-Love-logo-300x64.png","datePublished":"2014-01-20T17:01:29+00:00","dateModified":"2014-01-18T23:54:56+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/4250884f68a588907744baa491f9df35"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2014\/01\/why-its-fun-to-be-perfectly-imperfect.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2014\/01\/why-its-fun-to-be-perfectly-imperfect.html"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2014\/01\/why-its-fun-to-be-perfectly-imperfect.html#primaryimage","url":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/files\/2012\/12\/Self-Love-logo-300x64.png","contentUrl":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/files\/2012\/12\/Self-Love-logo-300x64.png"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2014\/01\/why-its-fun-to-be-perfectly-imperfect.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Why It\u2019s Fun to Be Perfectly Imperfect"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/","name":"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","description":"Beliefnet Voices - Daylle Deanna Schwartz","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/4250884f68a588907744baa491f9df35","name":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/83b\/83ba6e1423377712fe408a5fab971bfax96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/83b\/83ba6e1423377712fe408a5fab971bfax96.jpg","caption":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz"},"description":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz is a speaker, self-empowerment counselor, best-selling author of 15 books, including Nice Girls Can Finish First (McGraw-Hill), All Men Are Jerks Until Proven Otherwise and founder of The Self-Love Movement\u2122 where she's giving away her 13th book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways, a She's appeared on hundreds of TV and radio shows, including Oprah, Howard Stern, and Good Morning America and has been quoted in dozens of publications, including the New York Times, Chicago Sun-Times, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Marie Claire, and Men\u00b9s Health. After being a consummate People Pleaser who felt unworthy of getting her own needs met for many years, Daylle found a path of self-love that enabled her to build her self-esteem and reinvent herself into a dual career. She learned to get taken seriously without being overtly assertive when she became one of the first women to start an independent record label (on a dare!) and learned to play ball nicely and successfully in an industry dominated by men. To help independent musicians empower themselves, Daylle writes music business books for Billboard\/Random House, including the very popular Start &amp; Run Your Own Record Labe and I Don't Need a Record Deal! Daylle's books have been translated into over 10 languages and are popular around the world. She speaks for colleges, organizations and corporations. Through her company, Project Self-Empowerment, Daylle creates programs and materials to help people empower themselves. One goal is to raise the money to self-publish her book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways and give it away for free in colleges and through organizations, to give thanks for all her blessings. Daylle uses her writing and speaking to help others find the kind of contentment and empowerment that she has.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/author\/dschwartz"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5181","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/83"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5181"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5181\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5185,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5181\/revisions\/5185"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5181"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5181"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5181"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}