{"id":4676,"date":"2013-09-10T12:01:06","date_gmt":"2013-09-10T16:01:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/?p=4676"},"modified":"2013-09-10T21:29:46","modified_gmt":"2013-09-11T01:29:46","slug":"law-of-attraction-in-action-i-dont-need-anything","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/09\/law-of-attraction-in-action-i-dont-need-anything.html","title":{"rendered":"Law of Attraction in Action: \u201cI Don\u2019t Need Anything\u201d"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/files\/2011\/05\/LOAlogoBLOG.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-1629\" alt=\"LOAlogoBLOG\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-media.beliefnet.com\/sites\/91\/2011\/05\/LOAlogoBLOG-231x300.jpg\" width=\"231\" height=\"300\" \/><\/a>This is post 250 in my series on the <a href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/01\/Law-of-Attraction-in-Action-Series.html\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>Law of Attraction in Action<\/strong><\/a>. You CAN use your power to manifest your desires. I do it every day! Read all the posts in my <a href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/01\/Law-of-Attraction-in-Action-Series.html\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>Law of Attraction in Action Series<\/strong><\/a> to see how.<\/p>\n<p>Do you tend to try to do everything for yourself? Do you find it hard to delegate work? Do you feel good about not being dependent on anyone? Would you rather work and be responsible for everything rather than to ask for help?<\/p>\n<p>Bu it&#8217;s not good if it goes to extremes\u2014always having to do everything or yourself or refusing help when it\u2019s offered. This can happen if you:<\/p>\n<p>\u2022\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0Were burned by someone you counted on<br \/>\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0Someone you let help you botched it<br \/>\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0Were bought up being taught that a man shouldn\u2019t have to ask for help<br \/>\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Are so focused on pleasing other that you hate to take from others<\/p>\n<p>That was me when I was a DoorMat\u2014most of them! The few people I counted on rarely came through and it hurt. So I wanted to avoid painful disappoint by not counting on anyone. Not depending on anyone doing everything for myself seemed safer way to live. I\u2019ve had a few interns over the years but never gave hem much to do after two created more problems than the help I got from them. So why bother? As a consummate people pleaser I thought people would like me more if I asked nothing of them.<\/p>\n<p>I felt so proud of being an independent woman. But that wasn\u2019t healthy independence! It was a form of rejecting support, which told the Universe I didn\u2019t want any. So I got none.<\/p>\n<p>Interdependence with others is the best way to be. That means giving and accepting help, as I explained in my post <a href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/relying-on-others.html\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>Relying on Others<\/strong><\/a>. Independence is a great quality to have to a point. From a Law of Attraction perspective, being independent to the extreme of not letting any help in, puts out a message that you need nothing from anyone&#8211;that you don&#8217;t want to receive. That prevents you from attracting people who might support your career, give more value to your life or just be a good friend.<\/p>\n<p>So if you have a mindset of \u201cI don\u2019t need anything from anyone,\u201d lose it!\u00a0 Be open to getting support from people. It took me a while to trust someone\u2019s offer of help. My first big milestone came when I was running a summer recreation program. I had an assistant but I did his job most days. I was so afraid that he wouldn&#8217;t do something as good as I would. One day he asked why I\u2019d hired him when he offered to do some of he tasks but I did it all. From then on I\u00a0 decided I had to begin delegating the responsibilities. He did a good job and I began to let go of my need to do everything myself.<\/p>\n<p>When I became more open to getting support, I began to attract good supportive people, instead of telling the universe that I didn\u2019t want any. Create your own healthy interdependence, as I discussed in MY post on <a href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/07\/law-of-attraction-in-action-independence.html\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>Independence<\/strong><\/a>. Tell the Universe that you\u2019re open to getting support and you\u2019ll attract more.<\/p>\n<p>See all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series <a href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/01\/Law-of-Attraction-in-Action-Series.html t\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>HERE.<\/strong><\/a><br \/>\n**************<\/p>\n<p>Join the <a href=\"http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>Self-Love Movement\u2122<\/strong><\/a>! Take the <a href=\"http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com\/the-pledge\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>31 Days of Self-Love Commitment<\/strong><\/a> and get my book, <strong><a href=\"http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com\/the-book\" target=\"_blank\">How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways<\/a><\/strong> for free at <strong><a href=\"http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com\/\">http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com<\/a><\/strong>. Read my 2013 31 Days of Self-Love Posts <a href=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/02\/3961.html\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>HERE<\/strong><\/a>. Join the <a href=\"http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>Self-Love Movement\u2122<\/strong><\/a>! on <a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/TheSelfLoveMovement\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>Facebook<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Please leave comments under my posts so we can stay connected.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This is post 250 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to manifest your desires. I do it every day! Read all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series to see how. Do you tend to try to do everything for yourself? Do you&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":83,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13,1,14,2,15],"tags":[24,285,55],"class_list":["post-4676","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-law-of-attraction-in-action-series","category-nice-people-can-finish-first","category-positive-mental-attitude","category-self-empowerment-confidence","category-self-love-acceptance","tag-law-of-attraction","tag-manifest-your-desires","tag-receiving"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Law of Attraction in Action: \u201cI Don\u2019t Need Anything\u201d - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/09\/law-of-attraction-in-action-i-dont-need-anything.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Law of Attraction in Action: \u201cI Don\u2019t Need Anything\u201d - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This is post 250 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to manifest your desires. I do it every day! Read all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series to see how. Do you tend to try to do everything for yourself? Do you&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/09\/law-of-attraction-in-action-i-dont-need-anything.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2013-09-10T16:01:06+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2013-09-11T01:29:46+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/files\/2011\/05\/LOAlogoBLOG-231x300.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Daylle Deanna Schwartz\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Law of Attraction in Action: \u201cI Don\u2019t Need Anything\u201d - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/09\/law-of-attraction-in-action-i-dont-need-anything.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Law of Attraction in Action: \u201cI Don\u2019t Need Anything\u201d - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","og_description":"This is post 250 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to manifest your desires. I do it every day! Read all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series to see how. Do you tend to try to do everything for yourself? 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Let Me Count the Ways, a She's appeared on hundreds of TV and radio shows, including Oprah, Howard Stern, and Good Morning America and has been quoted in dozens of publications, including the New York Times, Chicago Sun-Times, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Marie Claire, and Men\u00b9s Health. After being a consummate People Pleaser who felt unworthy of getting her own needs met for many years, Daylle found a path of self-love that enabled her to build her self-esteem and reinvent herself into a dual career. She learned to get taken seriously without being overtly assertive when she became one of the first women to start an independent record label (on a dare!) and learned to play ball nicely and successfully in an industry dominated by men. To help independent musicians empower themselves, Daylle writes music business books for Billboard\/Random House, including the very popular Start &amp; Run Your Own Record Labe and I Don't Need a Record Deal! Daylle's books have been translated into over 10 languages and are popular around the world. She speaks for colleges, organizations and corporations. Through her company, Project Self-Empowerment, Daylle creates programs and materials to help people empower themselves. One goal is to raise the money to self-publish her book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways and give it away for free in colleges and through organizations, to give thanks for all her blessings. Daylle uses her writing and speaking to help others find the kind of contentment and empowerment that she has.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/author\/dschwartz"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4676","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/83"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4676"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4676\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4801,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4676\/revisions\/4801"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4676"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4676"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4676"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}