{"id":4559,"date":"2013-08-09T12:01:16","date_gmt":"2013-08-09T16:01:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/?p=4559"},"modified":"2013-06-12T14:38:00","modified_gmt":"2013-06-12T18:38:00","slug":"setting-priorities","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/setting-priorities.html","title":{"rendered":"Setting Priorities"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"#1\"<\/a>My plate often feels overfilled. I hear this from many people. But I learned the hard way that trying to do it all leads to stress, low energy, other health issues and, you often get nothing done properly. Self-empowerment includes prioritizing what you have to do. And, making sure you don\u2019t prioritize other people\u2019s needs over your own, which is not self-loving or helpful to you!<\/p>\n

When I was trying to get my career off the ground I jumped from one thing to another. I was writing many books at one time but never tried to get one published because I was so busy going from one to another. I enjoyed what I was doing to an extent. I\u2019d feel excited writing since it lent itself to my dreams, except that I didn\u2019t make any career progress. To some degree, I didn\u2019t want to try to get one of my books published since if I was rejected, I wouldn\u2019t have the pleasure of my dreams to live with.<\/p>\n

After years of this pattern, I finally decided I wanted to get something published. My first thought was I wanted all my books to get deals at once. But then I realized that if I kept going the way I\u2019d been, nothing would ever become a book. I knew I had to make the effort to set a priority\u2014choose one book to focus on writing and getting a deal for. To get myself on the right path, I asked myself:<\/p>\n

\u2022\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0Do I want this badly enough to set and keep priorities?<\/strong> Yes! I knew I did want it enough. It was getting silly to keep writing books that no one would read.
\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0Am I willing to choose one thing to focus on bringing to fruition?<\/strong> Yes! In my case it was choosing one book to go after a publishing deal for.
\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0What’s the best goal to do first?<\/strong> I had to decide which book had the best chance for getting a deal so I could move on from there and do my other goals, a few at a time.
\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0Can I focus all my energy on the goal I picked?<\/strong> If you can\u2019t, then it\u2019s not the right goal to do first.<\/p>\n

If you\u2019ve been jumping from one thing to another, decide what\u2019s most important to you and put all your energy into it. Put other goals aside\u2014for now\u2014and do your best to make that one goal happen. When you succeed it might allow you to move to other goals. I chose to write the Real Deal: How to Get Signed to a Record Label, because there were no other books on that topic and I felt there was a strong market for it. I was right. I got the proposal for it and some sample chapters into good shape and\u00a0 got my first book deal.<\/p>\n

Once I go that first deal, I was able to leverage my status as a published author with a book that was selling well to get more deals. My first editor asked me to write Start & Run Your Own Record Label. I told him I would, as long as he was okay with me also getting a deal for All Men are Jerks Until Proven Otherwise<\/strong><\/a> at the same time. He had no problem with it so I went from no book deals to three by prioritizing. Each choice of which to do next was made with a combo of asking to be spiritually guided and objectively assessing which was the best goal to focus on.<\/p>\n

My music business books have all been best sellers around the world and All Men are Jerks Until Proven Otherwise<\/strong> <\/a>was just released in its 15th Anniversary edition.<\/a> Setting priorities and working on the first book only and then focusing on just two more opened the doors that got me to where I am today. All the books I was writing back then have been published over the years since. Had I continued jumping from one book to another I’d probably still be wishing to be a published author.<\/p>\n

If you\u2019re working on many things for work or play and don\u2019t seem to get any done, make one or two a priority and you\u2019ll accomplish more. Choose the day you are absolutely going to do laundry, get the clothes ready in advance do it. While waiting for the machines to finish, polish your resume and explore job opportunities online. Laundry might seem like it should be low on your priority list but I hear too many people complaining about not having enough time to wash their clothes or tidy their living space and can tell it makes them unhappy.<\/p>\n

So choose a household core and a goal to do something that\u2019s important you. Write them down in big letters. Think of them as your priorities and do what you can to get them done. You\u2019ll feel great after you accomplish chores and goals!
\n***************<\/p>\n

Join the Self-Love Movement\u2122<\/strong><\/a>! Take the 31 Days of Self-Love Commitment<\/strong><\/a> and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways<\/a><\/strong> for free at http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com<\/a><\/strong>. Read my 2013 31 Days of Self-Love Posts HERE<\/strong><\/a>. Join the Self-Love Movement\u2122<\/strong><\/a>! on Facebook<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n

Please leave comments under my posts so we can stay connected.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

My plate often feels overfilled. I hear this from many people. But I learned the hard way that trying to do it all leads to stress, low energy, other health issues and, you often get nothing done properly. Self-empowerment includes prioritizing what you have to do. And, making sure you don\u2019t prioritize other people\u2019s needs…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":83,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[719,88],"class_list":["post-4559","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nice-people-can-finish-first","tag-prioritiizing-goals","tag-self-empowerment"],"yoast_head":"\nSetting Priorities - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/setting-priorities.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Setting Priorities - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"My plate often feels overfilled. I hear this from many people. But I learned the hard way that trying to do it all leads to stress, low energy, other health issues and, you often get nothing done properly. Self-empowerment includes prioritizing what you have to do. And, making sure you don\u2019t prioritize other people\u2019s needs…\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/setting-priorities.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2013-08-09T16:01:16+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2013-06-12T18:38:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/files\/2013\/06\/1-300x225.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Daylle Deanna Schwartz\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Setting Priorities - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/setting-priorities.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Setting Priorities - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","og_description":"My plate often feels overfilled. I hear this from many people. But I learned the hard way that trying to do it all leads to stress, low energy, other health issues and, you often get nothing done properly. Self-empowerment includes prioritizing what you have to do. And, making sure you don\u2019t prioritize other people\u2019s needs…","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/setting-priorities.html","og_site_name":"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","article_published_time":"2013-08-09T16:01:16+00:00","article_modified_time":"2013-06-12T18:38:00+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/files\/2013\/06\/1-300x225.jpg"}],"author":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/setting-priorities.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/setting-priorities.html","name":"Setting Priorities - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/setting-priorities.html#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/setting-priorities.html#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/files\/2013\/06\/1-300x225.jpg","datePublished":"2013-08-09T16:01:16+00:00","dateModified":"2013-06-12T18:38:00+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/4250884f68a588907744baa491f9df35"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/setting-priorities.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/setting-priorities.html"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/setting-priorities.html#primaryimage","url":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/files\/2013\/06\/1-300x225.jpg","contentUrl":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/files\/2013\/06\/1-300x225.jpg"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2013\/08\/setting-priorities.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Setting Priorities"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/","name":"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","description":"Beliefnet Voices - Daylle Deanna Schwartz","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/4250884f68a588907744baa491f9df35","name":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/83b\/83ba6e1423377712fe408a5fab971bfax96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/83b\/83ba6e1423377712fe408a5fab971bfax96.jpg","caption":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz"},"description":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz is a speaker, self-empowerment counselor, best-selling author of 15 books, including Nice Girls Can Finish First (McGraw-Hill), All Men Are Jerks Until Proven Otherwise and founder of The Self-Love Movement\u2122 where she's giving away her 13th book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways, a She's appeared on hundreds of TV and radio shows, including Oprah, Howard Stern, and Good Morning America and has been quoted in dozens of publications, including the New York Times, Chicago Sun-Times, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Marie Claire, and Men\u00b9s Health. After being a consummate People Pleaser who felt unworthy of getting her own needs met for many years, Daylle found a path of self-love that enabled her to build her self-esteem and reinvent herself into a dual career. She learned to get taken seriously without being overtly assertive when she became one of the first women to start an independent record label (on a dare!) and learned to play ball nicely and successfully in an industry dominated by men. To help independent musicians empower themselves, Daylle writes music business books for Billboard\/Random House, including the very popular Start & Run Your Own Record Labe and I Don't Need a Record Deal! Daylle's books have been translated into over 10 languages and are popular around the world. She speaks for colleges, organizations and corporations. Through her company, Project Self-Empowerment, Daylle creates programs and materials to help people empower themselves. One goal is to raise the money to self-publish her book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways and give it away for free in colleges and through organizations, to give thanks for all her blessings. Daylle uses her writing and speaking to help others find the kind of contentment and empowerment that she has.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/author\/dschwartz"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4559","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/83"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4559"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4559\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4561,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4559\/revisions\/4561"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4559"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4559"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4559"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}