{"id":346,"date":"2007-09-06T09:55:00","date_gmt":"2007-09-06T09:55:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/09\/carrie-bradshaw-finally-got-it-right.html"},"modified":"2007-09-06T09:55:00","modified_gmt":"2007-09-06T09:55:00","slug":"carrie-bradshaw-finally-got-it-right","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/09\/carrie-bradshaw-finally-got-it-right.html","title":{"rendered":"Carrie Bradshaw Finally Got it Right!"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/a>
Like many people, I watched Sex and the City<\/span> and related to the Carrie Bradshaw character. She waffled between self-empowered and struggles with men. Her obsession with Big showed her vulnerability. That\u2019s why I was so delighted with her last statement on the final episode:<\/p>\n

\u201cThe most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love the you YOU love, well, that\u2019s just fabulous.\u201d<\/span> <\/p>\n

A majority of people don\u2019t have a good relationship with themselves. We have relationships with money, romantic partners, friends, even stuff we buy. These days, some people have better relationships with their tech toys<\/span>\u2014computers, Blackberrys, iPhones, etc.\u2014than they have with people, no less themselves<\/span>. Just today a woman said she stopped dating a guy who practically lived on line. Even his sex life was \u201csatisfied\u201d on porn sites. We\u2019re becoming a society of intimacy disconnect. <\/p>\n

YOU often come in last when relationships come to mind. Yet a relationship with yourself is most important<\/span>. It sets a good foundation for all other relationships. I used to be who others wanted me to be. I bought into the hype of chasing what\u2019s touted as a must have or must be. Nobody told me that I was important. It was all about everyone else.<\/p>\n

Then I discovered the blessing of loving myself<\/span>. The rest of my lovely life fell into place after that!<\/p>\n

What does self-loving mean? Showing yourself kindness. Making an effort to do things that are comforting or enjoyable. Taking good care of your health is loving. So is treating yourself to a splurge. The more you treat yourself in ways that make you feel good, the more loving you feel toward YOU<\/span>. This isn\u2019t about self-absorption. It\u2019s about a conscientious effort to take care of you<\/span>. That\u2019s self-love and it brings all sorts of goodies!<\/p>\n

How many times do you go to a mirror and say \u201cI love you<\/span>?\u201d Are you spoutin\u2019 zeroes? I do it easily now. Falling in love with YOU means going beyond how you look, your age and how much money you make to appreciate the person YOU ARE and the values YOU\u2019VE chosen<\/span>. I\u2019ll be giving tips for doing this in future posts. For now, become conscious of how loving\u2014or not\u2014you are to YOU.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll repeat this quote:
\u201cThe most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love the you YOU love, well, that\u2019s just fabulous.\u201d<\/span> <\/p>\n

When you\u2014male or female\u2014have a loving relationship with yourself, and value who you are as a unique individual who\u2019s worthy of love and happiness<\/span>, it\u2019s harder to settle for a romantic partner who isn\u2019t right for you. That really is just fabulous because it helps you wait to meet someone who does love you for the right reasons.<\/p>\n

Since I loved Sex and the City<\/span> so much, I was delighted to have the opportunity to be a guest on Candace Bushnell<\/span>\u2019s (creator of Sex and the City) radio show on Sirius. I\u2019ve done many appearances but never did I do a whole hour live with a glass of wine that was never allowed to get low<\/span>. We laughed, screamed and debated topics about relationships and being empowered. Since I\u2019ve learned to love and appreciate me, blessings like this manifest regularly! That\u2019s Candace and I in the photo.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Like many people, I watched Sex and the City and related to the Carrie Bradshaw character. She waffled between self-empowered and struggles with men. Her obsession with Big showed her vulnerability. That\u2019s why I was so delighted with her last statement on the final episode: \u201cThe most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":83,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-346","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nice-people-can-finish-first"],"yoast_head":"\nCarrie Bradshaw Finally Got it Right! - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, nofollow\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Carrie Bradshaw Finally Got it Right! - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Like many people, I watched Sex and the City and related to the Carrie Bradshaw character. She waffled between self-empowered and struggles with men. Her obsession with Big showed her vulnerability. That\u2019s why I was so delighted with her last statement on the final episode: \u201cThe most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is…\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/09\/carrie-bradshaw-finally-got-it-right.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2007-09-06T09:55:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/RuAI9eMhDzI\/AAAAAAAAAAc\/wru8uDc1GVI\/s200\/Daylle+%26+Candace+Bushnell.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Daylle Deanna Schwartz\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Carrie Bradshaw Finally Got it Right! - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","robots":{"index":"noindex","follow":"nofollow"},"og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Carrie Bradshaw Finally Got it Right! - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","og_description":"Like many people, I watched Sex and the City and related to the Carrie Bradshaw character. She waffled between self-empowered and struggles with men. Her obsession with Big showed her vulnerability. That\u2019s why I was so delighted with her last statement on the final episode: \u201cThe most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is…","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/09\/carrie-bradshaw-finally-got-it-right.html","og_site_name":"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","article_published_time":"2007-09-06T09:55:00+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/RuAI9eMhDzI\/AAAAAAAAAAc\/wru8uDc1GVI\/s200\/Daylle+%26+Candace+Bushnell.jpg"}],"author":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/09\/carrie-bradshaw-finally-got-it-right.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/09\/carrie-bradshaw-finally-got-it-right.html","name":"Carrie Bradshaw Finally Got it Right! - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/09\/carrie-bradshaw-finally-got-it-right.html#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/09\/carrie-bradshaw-finally-got-it-right.html#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/RuAI9eMhDzI\/AAAAAAAAAAc\/wru8uDc1GVI\/s200\/Daylle+%26+Candace+Bushnell.jpg","datePublished":"2007-09-06T09:55:00+00:00","dateModified":"2007-09-06T09:55:00+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/4250884f68a588907744baa491f9df35"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/09\/carrie-bradshaw-finally-got-it-right.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/09\/carrie-bradshaw-finally-got-it-right.html"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/09\/carrie-bradshaw-finally-got-it-right.html#primaryimage","url":"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/RuAI9eMhDzI\/AAAAAAAAAAc\/wru8uDc1GVI\/s200\/Daylle+%26+Candace+Bushnell.jpg","contentUrl":"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/RuAI9eMhDzI\/AAAAAAAAAAc\/wru8uDc1GVI\/s200\/Daylle+%26+Candace+Bushnell.jpg"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/09\/carrie-bradshaw-finally-got-it-right.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Carrie Bradshaw Finally Got it Right!"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/","name":"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","description":"Beliefnet Voices - Daylle Deanna Schwartz","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/4250884f68a588907744baa491f9df35","name":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/83b\/83ba6e1423377712fe408a5fab971bfax96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/83b\/83ba6e1423377712fe408a5fab971bfax96.jpg","caption":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz"},"description":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz is a speaker, self-empowerment counselor, best-selling author of 15 books, including Nice Girls Can Finish First (McGraw-Hill), All Men Are Jerks Until Proven Otherwise and founder of The Self-Love Movement\u2122 where she's giving away her 13th book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways, a She's appeared on hundreds of TV and radio shows, including Oprah, Howard Stern, and Good Morning America and has been quoted in dozens of publications, including the New York Times, Chicago Sun-Times, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Marie Claire, and Men\u00b9s Health. After being a consummate People Pleaser who felt unworthy of getting her own needs met for many years, Daylle found a path of self-love that enabled her to build her self-esteem and reinvent herself into a dual career. She learned to get taken seriously without being overtly assertive when she became one of the first women to start an independent record label (on a dare!) and learned to play ball nicely and successfully in an industry dominated by men. To help independent musicians empower themselves, Daylle writes music business books for Billboard\/Random House, including the very popular Start & Run Your Own Record Labe and I Don't Need a Record Deal! Daylle's books have been translated into over 10 languages and are popular around the world. She speaks for colleges, organizations and corporations. Through her company, Project Self-Empowerment, Daylle creates programs and materials to help people empower themselves. One goal is to raise the money to self-publish her book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways and give it away for free in colleges and through organizations, to give thanks for all her blessings. Daylle uses her writing and speaking to help others find the kind of contentment and empowerment that she has.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/author\/dschwartz"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/346","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/83"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=346"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/346\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=346"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=346"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=346"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}