{"id":343,"date":"2007-08-30T15:35:00","date_gmt":"2007-08-30T15:35:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html"},"modified":"2007-08-30T15:35:00","modified_gmt":"2007-08-30T15:35:00","slug":"britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html","title":{"rendered":"Britney Spears Shows Fame Can\u2019t Buy Self-Respect"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/RtcenuMhDxI\/AAAAAAAAAAM\/YmofGSEt0I8\/s1600-h\/DSCN0012_o.JPG\"><img decoding=\"async\" style=\"float:left;margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer;cursor:hand\" src=\"https:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/RtcenuMhDxI\/AAAAAAAAAAM\/YmofGSEt0I8\/s320\/DSCN0012_o.JPG\" border=\"0\" \/><\/a><br \/>Britney has looks, tons of money, enough talent by her fans standards to make more money, and two healthy kids. Seems like she has most of what she said she wanted. <span style=\"font-weight:bold\">But she can\u2019t buy respect, from others or from herself<\/span>. And she\u2019s doing everything she can to prevent herself from earning it. When the public begins to regard K Fed as the better parent for the Britney pups, you know she\u2019d better start swimming upstream fast!<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight:bold\">Too many young, hot stars jump into adulthood in the limelight of adulation<\/span> and tons of money. The press and their fans put them on pedestals. People kiss their butts. They believe they\u2019re all that. And their worlds revolve around what they wear, who they sleep with, and dodging the paparazzi who chase their superior derrieres. But <span style=\"font-weight:bold\">arrogance doesn\u2019t lead to self-respect<\/span>. Nor does being inflated by media attention.<\/p>\n<p>Britney may act all self-important, but her lack of self-respect is obvious. We tend to treat others the way we view ourselves under the layers of fa\u00e7ade and attitude used for self-protection. <span style=\"font-weight:bold\">When you love yourself, you\u2019re much more likely to be loving to others<\/span>. People with sincerely good self-esteem have much less or no need to demean others or do nasties. When you respect yourself, you\u2019re much more likely to respect others. <\/p>\n<p>Britney\u2019s behavior shows her true self-image. She disrespected her appearance when she shaved her head. Her lack of self-respect endangers her kids. <span style=\"font-weight:bold\">It doesn\u2019t take much to know you don\u2019t drive with a child on your lap<\/span>, for any reason, or be so lax you almost drop one. Now she may lose custody of them. Brit pushes people who care away. She hires and fires based on mood. <span style=\"font-weight:bold\">People with self-respect work things out, not cut everyone off<\/span>. While no one is perfect, this has become Brit\u2019s pattern. <\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight:bold\">The OK! magazine interview illustrated Brit&#8217;s lack of self-respect<\/span>. The magazine went the distance to accommodate Brit by arranging the photo shoot, paying her a huge fee, and getting expensive designer clothing for her to wear. Did Brit show appreciation? Nahhh! Her actions\u2014wiping greasy hands on a designer dress while her dog pooped on a Zac Posen gown valued at $6,700\u2014reflected a lack of self-respect and self-love. <span style=\"font-weight:bold\">She got grease and dog poop on her reputation<\/span>. Does she think she\u2019s much better than us? Not at all. She poses like that but her actions give the true picture. By disrespecting folks who try to help her, and the props like designer clothing, she expresses how little she respects herself. You can\u2019t buy self-respect. It must be developed within. <\/p>\n<p>People who love themselves don\u2019t sabotage their careers or do blatantly stupid things that they know will cause a negative media frenzy. <span style=\"font-weight:bold\">Young celeb types like Britney and Lindsay don\u2019t learn to love themselves for who they are inside or look beyond getting love and attention from fans, and press attention<\/span>. Their actions show what a superficial level of happiness they have\u2014basing self-image on the accoutrements of being a celebrity. <span style=\"font-weight:bold\">Money, expensive possessions and career success don\u2019t translate to happiness<\/span>. It begins inside and radiates out. The material stuff is just extras!<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019ve been happy even when I didn\u2019t have much money, because I love me, not what I have. My compassion for Brit is deep. She had too much attention, too early in life to develop good self-esteem. Fame tainted her outlook. Everything focused on her image. <span style=\"font-weight:bold\">I\u2019m sure she\u2019s a nice girl who truly wants to be a good mom and be happy. But she doesn\u2019t know how.<\/span> Nor can she doesn\u2019t trust herself, so she doesn\u2019t trust people who want to help her. That makes it hard to grow into a happy woman. <\/p>\n<p>Meanwhile, many girls and young women look to Brit, et al, as examples of being cool. But they\u2019re not cool. Britney is stone cold self-disrespectful. <span style=\"font-weight:bold\">The grass on the other side may seem greener but some of these young stars in the public eye are hurting inside<\/span>. Those who look to them as role models set themselves up to also have low self-esteem by valuing the external. Feel compassion for these young women who don\u2019t know how to behave and self-destruct because of it. <span style=\"font-weight:bold\">Envying their money and fame is also envying their dysfunctions and unhappiness. Happy in your own skin is much more fun!<br \/><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Britney has looks, tons of money, enough talent by her fans standards to make more money, and two healthy kids. Seems like she has most of what she said she wanted. But she can\u2019t buy respect, from others or from herself. And she\u2019s doing everything she can to prevent herself from earning it. When the&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":83,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-343","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nice-people-can-finish-first"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Britney Spears Shows Fame Can\u2019t Buy Self-Respect - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Britney Spears Shows Fame Can\u2019t Buy Self-Respect - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Britney has looks, tons of money, enough talent by her fans standards to make more money, and two healthy kids. Seems like she has most of what she said she wanted. But she can\u2019t buy respect, from others or from herself. And she\u2019s doing everything she can to prevent herself from earning it. When the&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2007-08-30T15:35:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/RtcenuMhDxI\/AAAAAAAAAAM\/YmofGSEt0I8\/s320\/DSCN0012_o.JPG\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Daylle Deanna Schwartz\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Britney Spears Shows Fame Can\u2019t Buy Self-Respect - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Britney Spears Shows Fame Can\u2019t Buy Self-Respect - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","og_description":"Britney has looks, tons of money, enough talent by her fans standards to make more money, and two healthy kids. Seems like she has most of what she said she wanted. But she can\u2019t buy respect, from others or from herself. And she\u2019s doing everything she can to prevent herself from earning it. When the&hellip;","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html","og_site_name":"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","article_published_time":"2007-08-30T15:35:00+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/RtcenuMhDxI\/AAAAAAAAAAM\/YmofGSEt0I8\/s320\/DSCN0012_o.JPG"}],"author":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html","name":"Britney Spears Shows Fame Can\u2019t Buy Self-Respect - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/RtcenuMhDxI\/AAAAAAAAAAM\/YmofGSEt0I8\/s320\/DSCN0012_o.JPG","datePublished":"2007-08-30T15:35:00+00:00","dateModified":"2007-08-30T15:35:00+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/4250884f68a588907744baa491f9df35"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html#primaryimage","url":"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/RtcenuMhDxI\/AAAAAAAAAAM\/YmofGSEt0I8\/s320\/DSCN0012_o.JPG","contentUrl":"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/RtcenuMhDxI\/AAAAAAAAAAM\/YmofGSEt0I8\/s320\/DSCN0012_o.JPG"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/08\/britney-spears-shows-fame-cant-buy-self-respect.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Britney Spears Shows Fame Can\u2019t Buy Self-Respect"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/","name":"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","description":"Beliefnet Voices - Daylle Deanna Schwartz","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/4250884f68a588907744baa491f9df35","name":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/83b\/83ba6e1423377712fe408a5fab971bfax96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/83b\/83ba6e1423377712fe408a5fab971bfax96.jpg","caption":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz"},"description":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz is a speaker, self-empowerment counselor, best-selling author of 15 books, including Nice Girls Can Finish First (McGraw-Hill), All Men Are Jerks Until Proven Otherwise and founder of The Self-Love Movement\u2122 where she's giving away her 13th book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways, a She's appeared on hundreds of TV and radio shows, including Oprah, Howard Stern, and Good Morning America and has been quoted in dozens of publications, including the New York Times, Chicago Sun-Times, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Marie Claire, and Men\u00b9s Health. After being a consummate People Pleaser who felt unworthy of getting her own needs met for many years, Daylle found a path of self-love that enabled her to build her self-esteem and reinvent herself into a dual career. She learned to get taken seriously without being overtly assertive when she became one of the first women to start an independent record label (on a dare!) and learned to play ball nicely and successfully in an industry dominated by men. To help independent musicians empower themselves, Daylle writes music business books for Billboard\/Random House, including the very popular Start &amp; Run Your Own Record Labe and I Don't Need a Record Deal! Daylle's books have been translated into over 10 languages and are popular around the world. She speaks for colleges, organizations and corporations. Through her company, Project Self-Empowerment, Daylle creates programs and materials to help people empower themselves. One goal is to raise the money to self-publish her book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways and give it away for free in colleges and through organizations, to give thanks for all her blessings. Daylle uses her writing and speaking to help others find the kind of contentment and empowerment that she has.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/author\/dschwartz"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/343","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/83"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=343"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/343\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=343"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=343"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=343"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}