{"id":3335,"date":"2012-08-16T12:01:53","date_gmt":"2012-08-16T16:01:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/?p=3335"},"modified":"2012-07-02T13:23:48","modified_gmt":"2012-07-02T17:23:48","slug":"owning-your-greatness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2012\/08\/owning-your-greatness.html","title":{"rendered":"Owning Your Greatness"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>I\u2019m delighted to have Brad Yates<\/strong> <\/a>as my guest today. I\u2019ve posted several of his Tapping (EFT\u2014Emotional Freedom Technique) videos that he has on YouTube. While we\u2019ve never met, I feel like he\u2019s my friend as I watch his videos so often. Brad is trained in energy psychology and is an expert in Tapping. The hundreds of FREE videos<\/strong> <\/a>he puts out cover almost every issue you could possibly need help with. Doing Tapping has significantly changed my life and Brad’s videos are my favorites! He also offers all sorts of wonderful programs for making positive progress in many areas of your life.<\/p>\n

Just Who Do You Think You Are?<\/strong>
\nBy\u00a0Brad Yates<\/strong><\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

Perhaps, at some point in your life, you\u2019ve expressed a desire for something more than what you already had, and were met with the harshly intoned question: \u201cJust who do you think you are\u2026?!?\u201d The underlying message was likely that you must be mistaking yourself for something better than you were.\u00a0While it is unfortunate that they felt compelled to do this, one thing is certain\u2026 they were the ones who were mistaken about you.<\/p>\n

As a matter of fact, chances are pretty good that, like so many folks, your esteem of yourself was actually less than what you are truly worthy of.\u00a0And may still be so. Maybe it\u2019s time to change your mind about yourself.<\/p>\n

\u201cI am\u201d are two of the most powerful words there are \u2013 be very careful about what you attach to them.<\/p>\n

Unfortunately, too many of us define who we are by what we do and what we have.\u00a0But your circumstances and actions don’t accurately define you. Rather, your circumstances and actions are the result of how you’ve been identifying yourself. A bird doesn\u2019t wait until it can fly to know that it is a bird\u2026 it learns to fly because it knows it is a bird. Okay\u2026 so\u2026 birds probably don\u2019t have that kind of conscious self-awareness. \u201cBird-brain\u201d isn\u2019t exactly a term that denotes intelligence, but I think you get what I mean. But, even though the innate ability to fly is in there, a bird isn\u2019t likely to fly if it thinks it is a fish.<\/p>\n

Then you get the auk, which flies AND swims\u2026 but let me get back to the point. Being leads to doing which leads to having\u2014not the other way around. Most of us can think of things we\u2019d like to see change in our lives, improvements we\u2019d like to make.\u00a0 But in order to get different results, we need to do different things, or, in some cases, do things differently.<\/p>\n

As they say, \u201cIf you always do what you\u2019ve always done, you\u2019ll always get what you\u2019ve always gotten.\u201d<\/p>\n

But let’s face it. Trying to change what you do without changing how you see yourself is difficult, if not impossible. 80-90% of our behavior is unconscious. If you are not seeing yourself as successful, you will not naturally take successful action. You can try to consciously compel yourself to do something not congruent with your self-identity… but only 10-20% of the time. Then you’ll go back to your old ways of thinking and feeling, which lead to your old actions, which lead to the same old results. Perhaps you know what I’m talking about…?<\/p>\n

Whether it’s exercising, making sales calls, managing your finances… if it doesn’t fit who you think you are, if it is something you hate doing but feel you have to, it will always be a chore\u2014if it gets done at all. You will never outperform your self-image. So… maybe it’s time to see yourself as someone who can be\u2014and thus do and have\u2014what you really want!<\/p>\n

When you authentically see yourself as capable of and deserving of success, successful actions feel like “want to’s” rather than “have to’s.” And you will find yourself naturally taking them! What you currently have is indicative of how you are currently seeing yourself. If the gap between what you have and what you want is uncomfortable, you basically have three choices:<\/p>\n

One: Keep suffering. This is the option too many people chose, albeit usually unconsciously.<\/p>\n

Two: Change your desires to match what you are already experiencing. While I can appreciate the wisdom of the statement, \u201cIt\u2019s not about having what you want, but about wanting what you have,\u201d there\u2019s the danger that this can be used to justify not only having less than you could have but also being less than you could be, and thus giving the world less than you have to offer.<\/p>\n

OR<\/p>\n

Three: You can decide you can be, do and have more. You can transform what you see showing up in your life – personally and professionally – by transforming what you see in yourself.<\/p>\n

Too many people resign themselves to the notion that it isn\u2019t their decision, stating, “That’s just the way I am.” Nonsense! I can\u2019t argue that all opportunities are as readily available to all people.\u00a0 Some folks start out with some definite advantages. But I\u2019m convinced that the resources to live your best life possible are inside you \u2013 no matter where you came from.<\/p>\n

And there are plenty of folks who have succeeded in spite of seemingly overwhelming obstacles. The truth is, you have a natural tendency towards success. It’s in there. As Mufasta tells Simba in the Lion King: “You are more than what you have become.” But you can\u2019t wait until you see it before believing it.\u00a0 You will see it when you believe it.\u00a0 And you can learn to believe it (just as you\u2019ve learned to doubt it).<\/p>\n

Part of you may be saying at this point, “I can’t see myself as successful. There’s too much evidence to the contrary!”<\/p>\n

Evidence-schmevidence! I\u2019ll say it again: Whether you are looking at the numbers in your bank account, or the numbers on your bathroom scale, your circumstances don’t define you – your circumstances have been created by how you’ve been (often mistakenly) defining yourself. I think it\u2019s time for you to start thinking more highly of yourself. \u00a0But admittedly that\u2019s somewhat selfish on my part.\u00a0 I\u2019m confident that you defining yourself more favorably will not only benefit you, but rest of us as well.<\/p>\n

So, start doing what you can to cultivate a very positive self identity, so that when someone asks, \u201cJust who do you think you are?\u201d you smile confidently to yourself, and then go out and make wonderful things happen. In the immortal words of John Lennon:<\/p>\n

\u201cWho on earth d’you think you are?
\nA superstar? Well right you are!\u201d<\/p>\n

***************<\/p>\n

Check out\u00a0Brad Yates<\/strong><\/a> and all the resources he offers. You can sign up for him free newsletter on his site<\/strong><\/a>.
\n***************<\/p>\n

Take the 31 Days of Self-Love Challenge<\/strong><\/a>–a pledge to do something loving for yourself for the next 31 days–and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways<\/a><\/strong> for free at http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com<\/a><\/strong>. Read my 31 Days of Self-Love Posts from 2012 HERE<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Please leave comments under my posts so we can stay connected.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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Daylle's books have been translated into over 10 languages and are popular around the world. She speaks for colleges, organizations and corporations. Through her company, Project Self-Empowerment, Daylle creates programs and materials to help people empower themselves. One goal is to raise the money to self-publish her book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways and give it away for free in colleges and through organizations, to give thanks for all her blessings. 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