{"id":299,"date":"2007-11-19T18:39:00","date_gmt":"2007-11-19T18:39:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html"},"modified":"2007-11-19T18:39:00","modified_gmt":"2007-11-19T18:39:00","slug":"can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html","title":{"rendered":"Can You Really Live by the Grace of Passion?"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/a>Can You Really Live by the Grace of Passion?<\/span><\/p>\n

Absolutely YES! I read a post last week at Tom Volkar<\/span>\u2019s blog, Delightful Work<\/a><\/span>, called Work as Play?<\/a><\/span> It opened with the question, \u201cHave you yet found work that is so delightful that you\u2019d do it for free?\u201d Like me, Tom is his own boss. Also like me, he loves and values the total freedom of self-determination. Then he confessed that there\u2019s nothing he currently does that he\u2019d do for free. But being your own boss is definitely a blessing in itself. It can allow for passions in other areas. <\/p>\n

I commented that I\u2019m someone who found her passion and only do what I love<\/span>. <\/p>\n

I rarely meet people who feel the way about their work as I do about mine and know how hard it is to be in this place of satisfaction. A majority of people just work for the money.<\/span> I heard two guys chatting while we all waited on line in the bank. When asked how he was, the first said, \u201cyou know, eating, sleeping and working\u2014the great American dream\u2014hal ha!\u201d The other nodded in agreement. <\/p>\n

And here I thought the great American dream was to have opportunities. I\u2019m taking advantage of my version! After being a DoorMat with no self-determination, I\u2019m determined to hold onto my power\u2014because I CAN! <\/span><\/p>\n

These guys discussed how anxiously they looked forward to being able to take retirement. They weren\u2019t much over 40 years old and they were looking forward to retiring so they wouldn\u2019t have to work anymore! Ah\u2026 that was the pinnacle of joy in their eyes. I felt sad for them that they didn\u2019t seem to have things to look forward to tomorrow. So many people are in routines that they call life. But that isn\u2019t living\u2014it\u2019s passing time. <\/span><\/p>\n

Even if someone left me a huge trust fund, I\u2019d never stop writing. Never! I can\u2019t imagine not writing.<\/span><\/p>\n

When I was a Doormat, I did everything that was expected of me. It felt more like being in a comatose state than like living\u2014getting through today so I could get to tomorrow. Yet tomorrow I\u2019d do the same thing. I became a teacher because I was told that\u2019s what I should do. It developed into another routine as I stifled my need for passionate outlets. After leaving my husband, I continued teaching for a while, as I was prepared for nothing else. It was a time of soul searching. <\/p>\n

Then I discovered the power of having faith. As someone who was always a non-believer, feeling a strong spiritual support<\/span> blew me away. And impelled me to follow my heart<\/span>.<\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t want to spend the rest of my life in pursuit of ways to avoid living. When I finally decided to wake up, I was beyond the point of being scared. Still, I didn\u2019t just glide from point A\u2014unhappily teaching\u2014to points B-Z and beyond\u2014having a career that feels like a blessing each day. As Tom said, creating a life of self-determination isn\u2019t easy. I didn\u2019t just become a successful author. I built up to it. <\/p>\n

Preparation and desire can help you find a path to satisfaction from how you make a living.<\/span> Many authors have day jobs, so leaving mine was sort of scary. I say sort of, since I took steps before I cut off my other sources of income. I didn\u2019t quit a job since I\u2019ve actually never had a permanent one. For years I\u2019ve been commitment phobic about my time. I have no problem committing with the right guy. <\/p>\n

But my time\u2014that\u2019s the most valuable commodity<\/span> in my eyes.<\/p>\n

After many years of living in DoorMatville, my time became precious. I was tired of feeling committed to doing whatever others wanted. It was time to live and breathe on my own terms, so I didn\u2019t want obligations\u2014unless they were ones I truly desired\u2014to limit what I could do. I was teaching, but as a substitute once I got divorced. While I earned less in money and benefits, I gained more in freedom<\/span>. When the opportunity arose to travel, I could just say I wasn\u2019t available to work for two weeks, and off I\u2019d go. I love being free to do what I want, when I want, how I want. <\/p>\n

Subbing was easy. I could have worked every day if I chose to. But one day, after thinking about how much I didn\u2019t want to continue to do it, I realized I was ready to make the leap. At the end of the school year, I\u2019d get a renewal form to fill out to teach the following year. It was a simple page that I just had to sign, put it in the envelope they sent, and mail. So easy. And, so easy to continue in my rut. <\/p>\n

I decided I was ready to be happy! To rock and roll with life! So I burned the renewal and never looked back.<\/span><\/p>\n

Working for yourself can be tough, and I admire that Tom has been able to do that. I\u2019d never written anything for money and was just beginning to teach some workshops on the music industry and self-empowerment. There was no clear vision of how I\u2019d earn a living. But by that time, my faith was VERY strong and I was living according to the law of attraction. I knew I had to make room in my life. I could have renewed the license, put it in a draw and just not teach. But, that showed doubt, and I don\u2019t doubt God\u2019s support! I knew when I showed I\u2019m ready for it, the guide would come. My circumstance just worked out after that. <\/p>\n

Once my safety net was cut, opportunities opened.<\/span> Even in quiet financial times, I keep the faith. I\u2019m on a happy path and don\u2019t ever want to get off it. If you choose to make changes, do it slowly. Take the time to explore your options. Decide what\u2019s most important to you. Next week I\u2019ll post some specific tips for getting out of a work rut. For now, think about how happy you are\u2014or aren\u2019t. Then decide what it\u2019s worth to look forward to work instead of looking forward to it being over.<\/span><\/p>\n

In his blog Tom<\/a><\/span> also asked, \u201cCould the most delightful work possibly be the freedom to not work at all?<\/span>\u201d<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t think that would work for most people. There are many stories about people who win the lottery, quit work, and blow the money because it doesn\u2019t make them happy. It\u2019s important to have fulfilling work to live in order to live with satisfaction and contentment. My plan for when I win the lottery ? is to invest some for a guaranteed income to pay my bills and use the rest to help others. I\u2019d continue to write, speak, and counsel people, without having to get paid. Even if I became a gazillionaire, there\u2019s no way I\u2019d stop doing what I do now!<\/span> <\/p>\n

I know I\u2019m a very blessed chick! My passion for writing is so strong that I couldn\u2019t live without it.<\/span>

\"AddThis<\/a> var addthis_pub = ‘wryter’;
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Can You Really Live by the Grace of Passion? Absolutely YES! I read a post last week at Tom Volkar\u2019s blog, Delightful Work, called Work as Play? It opened with the question, \u201cHave you yet found work that is so delightful that you\u2019d do it for free?\u201d Like me, Tom is his own boss. Also…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":83,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-299","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nice-people-can-finish-first"],"yoast_head":"\nCan You Really Live by the Grace of Passion? - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Can You Really Live by the Grace of Passion? - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Can You Really Live by the Grace of Passion? Absolutely YES! I read a post last week at Tom Volkar\u2019s blog, Delightful Work, called Work as Play? It opened with the question, \u201cHave you yet found work that is so delightful that you\u2019d do it for free?\u201d Like me, Tom is his own boss. Also…\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2007-11-19T18:39:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/R0Ii4ox5N5I\/AAAAAAAAAGc\/BfLWmvn4pYU\/s200\/writing+in+Idaho.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Daylle Deanna Schwartz\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Can You Really Live by the Grace of Passion? - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Can You Really Live by the Grace of Passion? - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","og_description":"Can You Really Live by the Grace of Passion? Absolutely YES! I read a post last week at Tom Volkar\u2019s blog, Delightful Work, called Work as Play? It opened with the question, \u201cHave you yet found work that is so delightful that you\u2019d do it for free?\u201d Like me, Tom is his own boss. Also…","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html","og_site_name":"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","article_published_time":"2007-11-19T18:39:00+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/R0Ii4ox5N5I\/AAAAAAAAAGc\/BfLWmvn4pYU\/s200\/writing+in+Idaho.jpg"}],"author":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html","name":"Can You Really Live by the Grace of Passion? - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/R0Ii4ox5N5I\/AAAAAAAAAGc\/BfLWmvn4pYU\/s200\/writing+in+Idaho.jpg","datePublished":"2007-11-19T18:39:00+00:00","dateModified":"2007-11-19T18:39:00+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/4250884f68a588907744baa491f9df35"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html#primaryimage","url":"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/R0Ii4ox5N5I\/AAAAAAAAAGc\/BfLWmvn4pYU\/s200\/writing+in+Idaho.jpg","contentUrl":"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/R0Ii4ox5N5I\/AAAAAAAAAGc\/BfLWmvn4pYU\/s200\/writing+in+Idaho.jpg"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2007\/11\/can-you-really-live-by-the-grace-of-passion.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Can You Really Live by the Grace of Passion?"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/","name":"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","description":"Beliefnet Voices - Daylle Deanna Schwartz","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/4250884f68a588907744baa491f9df35","name":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/83b\/83ba6e1423377712fe408a5fab971bfax96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/83b\/83ba6e1423377712fe408a5fab971bfax96.jpg","caption":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz"},"description":"Daylle Deanna Schwartz is a speaker, self-empowerment counselor, best-selling author of 15 books, including Nice Girls Can Finish First (McGraw-Hill), All Men Are Jerks Until Proven Otherwise and founder of The Self-Love Movement\u2122 where she's giving away her 13th book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways, a She's appeared on hundreds of TV and radio shows, including Oprah, Howard Stern, and Good Morning America and has been quoted in dozens of publications, including the New York Times, Chicago Sun-Times, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Marie Claire, and Men\u00b9s Health. After being a consummate People Pleaser who felt unworthy of getting her own needs met for many years, Daylle found a path of self-love that enabled her to build her self-esteem and reinvent herself into a dual career. She learned to get taken seriously without being overtly assertive when she became one of the first women to start an independent record label (on a dare!) and learned to play ball nicely and successfully in an industry dominated by men. To help independent musicians empower themselves, Daylle writes music business books for Billboard\/Random House, including the very popular Start & Run Your Own Record Labe and I Don't Need a Record Deal! Daylle's books have been translated into over 10 languages and are popular around the world. She speaks for colleges, organizations and corporations. Through her company, Project Self-Empowerment, Daylle creates programs and materials to help people empower themselves. One goal is to raise the money to self-publish her book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways and give it away for free in colleges and through organizations, to give thanks for all her blessings. Daylle uses her writing and speaking to help others find the kind of contentment and empowerment that she has.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/author\/dschwartz"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/299","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/83"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=299"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/299\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=299"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=299"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=299"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}