{"id":2307,"date":"2011-12-16T12:01:11","date_gmt":"2011-12-16T17:01:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/?p=2307"},"modified":"2011-12-04T21:33:14","modified_gmt":"2011-12-05T02:33:14","slug":"why-life-can-be-like-fruit-cake","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2011\/12\/why-life-can-be-like-fruit-cake.html","title":{"rendered":"Why Life Can Be Like Fruitcake"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>Life doesn\u2019t always go smoothly, despite your best efforts. While I often recommend that you try to set boundaries on things you don\u2019t want to do, there are times when doing something unpleasant is the right things to do, even if it\u2019s uncomfortable. For example, if someone you care about is in the hospital, and you can\u2019t stand going to hospitals, you might have to accept the discomfort to support the person.<\/p>\n

Sometimes there are negative situations you must get through. A new boss may do things very differently than you\u2019re used to. The weather may be rainy for your vacation in the sun. Your last choice for the holidays is to spend it with your spouse\u2019s parents but it\u2019s only fair to alternate with your family. You get my drift. You do what you don\u2019t like because it\u2019s the right thing to do. For many people, it\u2019s the same attitude with fruitcake. Fruitcake is the brunt of a lot of jokes, especially this time of year.<\/p>\n

\u2022\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0\u201cWho on earth eats it?\u201d
\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0\u201cWhy do so many people buy it for the holidays?\u201d
\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0\u201cIt can be used as a weapon or a paperweight it\u2019s so heavy.\u201d
\n\u2022\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0\u201cIt doesn\u2019t even taste like cake!\u201d<\/p>\n

Yet if you look in stores both on and off line, fruitcakes are advertised for sale in large numbers. It seems to be associated with the holidays. They\u2019re usually packaged nicely so people think they make nice gifts when invited to someone\u2019s home. I know several people who re-gift them. Yet most people are gracious and thank the giver of the fruitcake. And people will politely eat a small piece after a dinner party.<\/p>\n

Like I said, there are many things you may not like but must tolerate. For many people fruitcake is one of them. It comes in a festive package, represents the holidays to many people, yet those same people may not actually want to eat it.<\/p>\n

Just like you can actually develop a taste for fruitcake with small bites, you can get used to your new boss and the new ideas and systems by taking it bite by bite and may even find yourself in a better place. The joy from your friend in the hospital can temper the discomfort of being there. Knowing you\u2019ve pleased your spouse by going to his\/her family for the holidays can help you deal with the family things you don\u2019t like. While it depends on who made the fruitcake, I actually enjoy it now.<\/p>\n

Taste things you don\u2019t like and find the good parts of them, especially during the holiday season when emotions can run high. Why not taste all the joy you can instead of bringing yourself down from things you find distasteful. Remember, life is what you make of it so make it wonderful!
\n*********************<\/p>\n

Take the 31 Days of Self-Love Challenge<\/strong><\/a> –a pledge to start your year by doing something kind for yourself for the first 31 days of January–and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways<\/a><\/strong> for free at http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com<\/a><\/strong>. And you can post your loving acts HERE<\/a><\/strong> to reinforce your intention to love yourself. Read my 31 Days of Self-Love Posts HERE<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Please leave comments under my posts so we can stay connected.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Life doesn\u2019t always go smoothly, despite your best efforts. While I often recommend that you try to set boundaries on things you don\u2019t want to do, there are times when doing something unpleasant is the right things to do, even if it\u2019s uncomfortable. 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Let Me Count the Ways, a She's appeared on hundreds of TV and radio shows, including Oprah, Howard Stern, and Good Morning America and has been quoted in dozens of publications, including the New York Times, Chicago Sun-Times, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Marie Claire, and Men\u00b9s Health. After being a consummate People Pleaser who felt unworthy of getting her own needs met for many years, Daylle found a path of self-love that enabled her to build her self-esteem and reinvent herself into a dual career. She learned to get taken seriously without being overtly assertive when she became one of the first women to start an independent record label (on a dare!) and learned to play ball nicely and successfully in an industry dominated by men. To help independent musicians empower themselves, Daylle writes music business books for Billboard\/Random House, including the very popular Start & Run Your Own Record Labe and I Don't Need a Record Deal! Daylle's books have been translated into over 10 languages and are popular around the world. She speaks for colleges, organizations and corporations. Through her company, Project Self-Empowerment, Daylle creates programs and materials to help people empower themselves. One goal is to raise the money to self-publish her book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways and give it away for free in colleges and through organizations, to give thanks for all her blessings. Daylle uses her writing and speaking to help others find the kind of contentment and empowerment that she has.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/author\/dschwartz"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2307","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/83"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2307"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2307\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2419,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2307\/revisions\/2419"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2307"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2307"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2307"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}