You\u2019re dying to stand up for yourself or ask for what you know you deserve. You work harder than anyone else yet haven\u2019t asked a raise. Your romantic partner does unacceptable things but you haven\u2019t had the nerve to address it. You\u2019re dying to buy your friend\u2019s car and he\u2019s taking advantage of knowing that by asking for more than it’s worth. Your oldest friend has been taking advantage of you to the point where you\u2019re about to burst, yet you keep your mouth shut.<\/p>\n
Many people don\u2019t take a stand on what they want, or don\u2019t want, because they\u2019re scared of the outcome.<\/strong><\/p>\n It makes sense. You don\u2019t ask for the raise if you\u2019re scared of losing your job. Even though your romantic partner drives you crazy, you love him\/her and want to keep the relationship going. You want the car so badly you may just pay the inflated price. And so on. So we tiptoe around important situations instead of taking a real stand.<\/strong> I used to do that too, even when I left DoorMatville, until I recognized a valuable truth:<\/p>\n In most situations where there\u2019s a conflict, the person willing to walk away has the most power<\/strong>.<\/p>\n When your boss sees you\u2019re willing to get another job that pays you what you\u2019re worth, she might relent and give you more money. If your romantic partner believes that if he\/she doesn\u2019t stop criticizing or lying, you\u2019re prepared to end the relationship, he\/she might try to treat you better. If your friend understands that you\u2019re ready to find another car at a better price, he might just lower what he asked for. Even if you strongly want to keep your job or partner or buy the car or seal the deal with a client, if you\u2019re prepared to walk away, you have a better chance of getting what you want.<\/p>\n Brian Tracy said, “Be prepared to walk away from any situation that is unacceptable to you. This is the ultimate negotiating tool.<\/strong>”<\/p>\n Negotiating. Many of us are uncomfortable doing that. But you can get better at it with practice. Think about your alternatives.<\/p>\n \u2022\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 If you won\u2019t leave your romantic partner, you\u2019re guaranteed to continue to get the behavior you don\u2019t like<\/strong>. Walking might hurt for a while but then you can find someone who treats you well. Or your partner might come around. You have the best chance of getting good results if you seem serious about leaving and the person really loves you. If the love isn\u2019t strong, better to leave!<\/p>\n \u2022\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 If your client says my way or the highway, you can seal a bad deal and lose money.<\/strong> You\u2019ll also set yourself up to be low-balled in the future. Or you can be okay with not sealing the deal and give yourself the best chance to get what you want. If the client really wants to deal with you, you\u2019ll get the business.<\/p>\n \u2022\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 If you bid on your dream house and the owner believes you have to have it, the price won\u2019t budge<\/strong>. If the owner sees you\u2019re serious about not buying the house unless the price goes down, you might get it for less than what was originally asked. If the person is anxious to sell, the price will go down.<\/p>\n Remember, the one most willing to walk on a deal, whether in business or pleasure, has the most power.<\/strong> Nothing is so important that you should be totally compromised to keep it. There\u2019s always another house or romantic partner or client. The more you stand up to people, the more your confidence will soar and the more people will give you your way. When you accept that nothing is more important than your good health, family and\u00a0 basic needs, and everything else is optional, you\u2019ll be more able to walk away from unhealthy situations and lowball offers. <\/strong>That\u2019s empowerment! Take the self-love challenge<\/strong><\/a> and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways<\/a><\/strong> for free at http:\/\/howdoiloveme.com<\/a>. And you can post your loving acts HERE<\/a><\/strong> to reinforce your intention to love yourself. Read my 31 Days of Self-Love Posts HERE<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n Please leave comments under my posts so we can stay connected.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" You\u2019re dying to stand up for yourself or ask for what you know you deserve. You work harder than anyone else yet haven\u2019t asked a raise. Your romantic partner does unacceptable things but you haven\u2019t had the nerve to address it. You\u2019re dying to buy your friend\u2019s car and he\u2019s taking advantage of knowing that…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":83,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1,14,2,15],"tags":[96,88],"class_list":["post-1818","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nice-people-can-finish-first","category-positive-mental-attitude","category-self-empowerment-confidence","category-self-love-acceptance","tag-negotiating","tag-self-empowerment"],"yoast_head":"\n
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