{"id":140,"date":"2009-02-09T16:30:00","date_gmt":"2009-02-09T16:30:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/02\/law-of-attraction-in-action-valentines-day.html"},"modified":"2009-02-09T16:30:00","modified_gmt":"2009-02-09T16:30:00","slug":"law-of-attraction-in-action-valentines-day","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/02\/law-of-attraction-in-action-valentines-day.html","title":{"rendered":"Law of Attraction in Action: Valentine\u2019s Day"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/SZ4cG6foszI\/AAAAAAAAA2E\/GycjdWLOmDg\/s1600-h\/LOA+logo2.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" style=\"margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt;float: left;cursor: pointer;width: 154px;height: 200px\" src=\"https:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/SZ4cG6foszI\/AAAAAAAAA2E\/GycjdWLOmDg\/s200\/LOA+logo2.jpg\" alt=\"\" border=\"0\" \/><\/a>This is post 26 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read <a href=\"http:\/\/www.lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat.com\/2009\/01\/law-of-attraction-in-action-series.html\">the posts in this series<\/a> to see how.<\/p>\n<p>Saturday is Valentine\u2019s Day, which I call V-Day. It\u2019s a day when MANY women wait for love to be specially expressed and romance to abound. It\u2019s also a day when many men get stressed or feel pressure to accommodate the expectations of their partners. And it\u2019s also a day when many single women feel depressed, like they\u2019re missing out on love. The expectations and longings on V-Day get blown up and create disproportionate expectations for one day of love.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Many emotions are stirred on February 14th each year! We give this one day so much importance.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>I admit that I\u2019m a hopeless romantic. I love sweet gestures and getting flowers and other surprises. But love isn\u2019t about obligation. It also isn\u2019t about forcing someone to express it with gifts. But that\u2019s what happens on this day designated for love. I laugh when I see men lined up at delis buying flowers and in drug stores buying last minute candy and stuffed animals and any other things to impress their ladies.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">This is all done as single chicks struggle to survive the day of love without a special man.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>I used to get depressed on V-Day if I didn\u2019t have someone to bring me flowers. I\u2019d often get together with a friend to commiserate a lack of love. Every time we saw someone walk by with flowers we had an ouch moment. Actually, we\u2019d torture ourselves. If I didn\u2019t see the flowers, she\u2019d point it out and vice versa. We\u2019d moan about not having a guy and share how much we both wanted to be in a relationship. I found it funny that the days before and after I was fine about being single.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">But February 14th brought out the needy in me as it does in many people.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>We\u2019re inundated with ads for romantic endeavors and gifts for a while before this targeted day for love. It can make even the strongest chick long for what we see or read about. Single men can feel the sadness too if they want to be in a relationship. I\u2019d bet that there\u2019s a lot of depression on V-Day when it\u2019s supposed to be a day to honor love. Even people in relationships feel let down from the pressure to buy the right gift or do the right thing. And the disappointment when your partner doesn\u2019t come up with the most romantic ways possible to express love.<\/p>\n<p>BUT&#8212;LOVE ISN\u2019T A ONCE A YEAR DEAL! <span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Putting so much into the love you get, or don\u2019t get, on February 14th demeans what love really is.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>When I was a DoorMat I waited in expectation for the guy I was with to make me feel loved. But the roses I got didn\u2019t change that  I still felt lousy about me; even hated myself often. The roses or dinner or one night display of affection was like a small band aid on a HUGE wound. That wound was from not loving myself. Now that I\u2019ve left DoorMatville, whether I\u2019m with a guy or not, I celebrate myself on V-Day. Then I always get the love I want the most\u2014from ME!<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">When you get depressed on Valentine\u2019s Day, you tell the Law of Attraction you have a lack love, which results in continuing to feel unloved.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Pay attention to all the love around you, whether it\u2019s romantic or a kind neighbor, family member or friend. Love comes in all kinds of packages, but it\u2019s still love and should be appreciated all year long. It may not feel the same as a romantic partner on V-Day but can still be satisfying. I once was in London on V-Day. I used to go there regularly when I had my record label and I stayed in a bed and breakfast owned by a family I became friends with.<\/p>\n<p>I was particularly friendly with Bernard, one of the brothers who owned it. He saw how down I was about having no love on V-Day. I saw people carrying flowers but none were for me. When I returned to my room later, there was a stuffed bear holding a bouquet of roses\u2014\u201cwith love from your friend Bernard.\u201d We weren\u2019t romantically involved but it made a big impact on my heart. I kept that bear for many years as a reminder of how pure and delightful a loving gesture like that can be.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">The biggest love that should be nurtured on V-Day is what you give to YOU!<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Strong self-love makes it easier to navigate the emotions on February 14th and gives it a lot less importance than what the media hypes it to be. Loving yourself is not only valid love, but it\u2019s the most critical and valuable kind. You can give it any time, any place, whether you\u2019re single or in a relationship.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Being loving to yourself sends the message that you deserve love, and therefore you\u2019ll attract more of it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>I learned this a few years ago when I broke up with someone just before the \u201cbig\u201d day. He was very romantic and I\u2019d looked forward to receiving roses and other goodies. But, he\u2019d done something that I knew couldn\u2019t be excused just for this reason. I began to get depressed when I went out and saw what seemed to be everyone carrying roses but me. My initial response was to feel unloved. But as I began to indulge in self-pity, I remembered:<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">The greatest gift to yourself is to love yourself. I made a vow that V-Day to honor that love! <\/span><\/p>\n<p>I imagined the most perfect rose in my head. It was yellow, with rusty orange edges and I went on a mission to find it. I just wanted on perfect rose. I finally found it in a florist shop for 10 bucks. That\u2019s right! I spend 10 bucks on ONE rose! I\u2019m worth it! It gave me such pleasure to be able to make myself feel so good from buying that rose. I\u2019ve been buying myself a bouquet of flowers every week for years, but this was the first time I\u2019d bought a rose. Now I do it occasionally just because, even when it\u2019s not V-Day!<\/p>\n<p>The heck with waiting for a guy to do it! I love me and if I have a boyfriend, I\u2019m loved even more, since I\u2019m already loved without one. <span style=\"font-weight: bold\">V-Day is now Self-Love Day to me!<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Honor yourself on Saturday, whether you\u2019re in a relationship or not. Do something special for you. Be loving and kind. <span style=\"font-weight: bold\">There\u2019s nothing like self-love for being consistent and always available.<\/span> It\u2019s not a substitute for the love of someone else. Even when I\u2019m in love with a guy, I\u2019m in love with myself too. Guys may come and go but I\u2019m here to stay! This Saturday I\u2019m planning a healthy day, since keeping myself fit and healthy is a super gift of self-love.<\/p>\n<p>The more you show yourself love, the more the Law of Attraction responds with more love. Corny as it sounds, LOVE does make my world joyous. Money is nice. Possessions are nice. Flowers are nice. But LOVE is priceless! <span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Indulge in self-love and allow the Law of Attraction to return it with more joy.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>HAPPY SELF-LOVE DAY TO ALL OF YOU! ?<\/p>\n<p>See all the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat.com\/2009\/01\/law-of-attraction-in-action-series.html\"><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Law of Attraction in Action Series.<\/span><\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>If you enjoyed my post, please leave a comment and\/or cli<br \/>\nck on the bookmark and write a short review at some of the sites, especially Stumbleupon and Digg. Thanks!<br \/><!-- AddThis Bookmark Button BEGIN --><br \/><a href=\"http:\/\/www.addthis.com\/bookmark.php\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/s9.addthis.com\/button1-bm.gif\" alt=\"AddThis Social Bookmark Button\" border=\"0\" height=\"16\" width=\"125\" \/><\/a> var addthis_pub = &#8216;wryter&#8217;;<br \/><!-- AddThis Bookmark Button END --><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This is post 26 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read the posts in this series to see how. Saturday is Valentine\u2019s Day, which I call V-Day. It\u2019s a day when MANY women wait for&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":83,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-140","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nice-people-can-finish-first"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Law of Attraction in Action: Valentine\u2019s Day - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/02\/law-of-attraction-in-action-valentines-day.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Law of Attraction in Action: Valentine\u2019s Day - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This is post 26 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read the posts in this series to see how. Saturday is Valentine\u2019s Day, which I call V-Day. It\u2019s a day when MANY women wait for&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/02\/law-of-attraction-in-action-valentines-day.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2009-02-09T16:30:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/SZ4cG6foszI\/AAAAAAAAA2E\/GycjdWLOmDg\/s200\/LOA+logo2.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Daylle Deanna Schwartz\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Law of Attraction in Action: Valentine\u2019s Day - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/02\/law-of-attraction-in-action-valentines-day.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Law of Attraction in Action: Valentine\u2019s Day - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","og_description":"This is post 26 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. 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Let Me Count the Ways, a She's appeared on hundreds of TV and radio shows, including Oprah, Howard Stern, and Good Morning America and has been quoted in dozens of publications, including the New York Times, Chicago Sun-Times, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Marie Claire, and Men\u00b9s Health. After being a consummate People Pleaser who felt unworthy of getting her own needs met for many years, Daylle found a path of self-love that enabled her to build her self-esteem and reinvent herself into a dual career. She learned to get taken seriously without being overtly assertive when she became one of the first women to start an independent record label (on a dare!) and learned to play ball nicely and successfully in an industry dominated by men. To help independent musicians empower themselves, Daylle writes music business books for Billboard\/Random House, including the very popular Start &amp; Run Your Own Record Labe and I Don't Need a Record Deal! Daylle's books have been translated into over 10 languages and are popular around the world. She speaks for colleges, organizations and corporations. Through her company, Project Self-Empowerment, Daylle creates programs and materials to help people empower themselves. One goal is to raise the money to self-publish her book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways and give it away for free in colleges and through organizations, to give thanks for all her blessings. Daylle uses her writing and speaking to help others find the kind of contentment and empowerment that she has.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/author\/dschwartz"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/140","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/83"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=140"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/140\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=140"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=140"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=140"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}