{"id":107,"date":"2009-06-01T13:26:00","date_gmt":"2009-06-01T13:26:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/06\/law-of-attraction-in-action-criticalmean-thoughts.html"},"modified":"2009-06-01T13:26:00","modified_gmt":"2009-06-01T13:26:00","slug":"law-of-attraction-in-action-criticalmean-thoughts","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/06\/law-of-attraction-in-action-criticalmean-thoughts.html","title":{"rendered":"Law of Attraction in Action: Critical\/Mean Thoughts"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/SaHpXrJCljI\/AAAAAAAAA2U\/pXTiy5hJCLU\/s1600-h\/*+LOA+logo2.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" style=\"margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt;float: left;cursor: pointer;width: 154px;height: 200px\" src=\"https:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/SaHpXrJCljI\/AAAAAAAAA2U\/pXTiy5hJCLU\/s200\/*+LOA+logo2.jpg\" alt=\"\" border=\"0\" \/><\/a>This is post 40 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read <a href=\"http:\/\/www.lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat.com\/2009\/01\/law-of-attraction-in-action-series.html\">the posts in this series<\/a> to see how.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m a nice person and don\u2019t want to be mean to anyone. But as I\u2019ve become more conscious of my thoughts, I realize that I have some about others that aren\u2019t nice. Did you ever see someone on the street and judge them? Maybe you wonder how she could leave her house wearing that outfit or doesn\u2019t he know that his toupee looks silly? I do. It\u2019s so easy to have critical thoughts that are silent. I used to think it didn\u2019t matter since the person couldn\u2019t hear them.<\/p>\n<p>But I hear them and so does the Universe. <span style=\"font-weight: bold\">I realized it\u2019s not nice, no matter if they\u2019re silent! Plus, it sets the wrong intentions into motion with the Law of Attraction.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>I walk a lot. Living in NYC allows me to go almost everywhere by foot. That means a lot of walking and passing a lot of people. I love to people watch and observe different behavior. As a writer, it fascinates me. But I also notice things that make me think thoughts that are critical of some of the people I pass. It used to be fun. I\u2019d wonder why she\u2019s with that goofy looking guy or why he\u2019s wearing that awful jacket.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Don\u2019t they have eyes to see how awful they look?<\/span><\/p>\n<p>I think that insecurity makes up pick on others, even if it&#8217;s silent. <span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Finding their faults subconsciously makes you feel a little less bad about your own.<\/span> Every one of us has some insecurity. No matter how good your self-esteem, there\u2019s something you\u2019d love to change if you could or a bad habit you can\u2019t break. I love myself and feel great about who I am but would love to lose more weight if the fat fairy would oblige. I\u2019m happy with my body but would still love to be more svelte. We all have things we\u2019d change if a magic wand could be waved to oblige us.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Accepting our imperfections, especially things we can\u2019t change<\/span>&#8212;such as being what you perceive as too short or the big one, not being able to get younger instead of older&#8212;<span style=\"font-weight: bold\">doesn\u2019t mean we wouldn\u2019t prefer to have what we lack.<\/span> And we can&#8217;t help feeling a little envy when seeing someone who has what we don&#8217;t. You just need to keep these normal feelings in persepective and control your response to them. I\u2019d love to be younger or thinner or have hair that doesn\u2019t frizz in humidity, etc. What would you love to change if you could?<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Criticism of others, even if just a passing thought, often reflects our own insecurity. But that doesn\u2019t make it right!<\/span><\/p>\n<p>When I finally caught myself, I became more aware that I don\u2019t like that kind of criticism directed at me. Even if I don\u2019t hear it, it\u2019s a yucky feeling. Yet I was doing it to others! I needed to stop. Consciousness became my guide. Once I noticed this bad habit, I was shocked to realize how often I have negative thoughts about people. I used to think it was harmless. But no negative is harmless!<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">The Law of Attraction returns our thoughts. I didn\u2019t want to attract negativity by being negative and had to stop!<\/span><\/p>\n<p>So I\u2019ve created a sort of self-warning system of consciousness and am still a work in progress. Breaking old habits takes time. But that\u2019s okay since it\u2019s better than not breaking them at all. And the process has been good for me! My awareness is very heightened now. When I notice someone I\u2019d normally rag on mentally, I can stop myself mid-rag now. Sometimes sooner. The important thing is making the effort to stop myself.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">When I notice something and begin a critical thought, I interrupt it by telling myself that isn\u2019t nice and I must stop. And I do. I often say &#8220;I&#8217;m sorry&#8221; too.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Each time I put the brakes on a negative feels good to me now. I used to get a kick out of making fun of someone in my head. Now I enjoy being able to stop myself. It\u2019s a great feeling of control. Each time I stop a negative thought about someone, usually a stranger, I applaud myself for breaking my habit of being silently mean. Mean is mean. I don\u2019t want to attract that into my world!<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">While the person I\u2019m making fun of in my head doesn\u2019t know I\u2019m doing it, I know, and so does the Law of Attraction.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>I feel more in control since I\u2019ve been working on stopping my habit. But I intend to break it entirely with practice. All habits can be broken with time and consciousness! Pay attention to your thoughts. Do you judge people in a harsh light in your head? Do you really want to do that? It seemed like a funny thing to me until I began studying the LOA. Now I know that it\u2019s not right, and can attract what I don\u2019t want. Thinking kinder thoughts about others attracts much better stuff. <span style=\"font-weight: bold\">When you do think kinder thoughts, you attract more kindness and compliments.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>See all the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat.com\/2009\/01\/law-of-attraction-in-action-series.html\"><span style=\"font-weight: bold\">Law of Attraction in Action Series.<\/span><\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>If you enjoyed my post, please leave a comment and\/or click on the bookmark and write a short review at some of the sites, especially Stumbleupon and Digg. Thanks!<br \/><!-- AddThis Bookmark Button BEGIN --><br \/><a href=\"http:\/\/www.addthis.com\/bookmark.php\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/s9.addthis.com\/button1-bm.gif\" alt=\"AddThis Social Bookmark Button\" border=\"0\" height=\"16\" width=\"125\" \/><\/a> var addthis_pub = &#8216;wryter&#8217;;<br \/><!-- AddThis Bookmark Button END --><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This is post 40 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read the posts in this series to see how. I\u2019m a nice person and don\u2019t want to be mean to anyone. But as I\u2019ve become&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":83,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-107","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nice-people-can-finish-first"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Law of Attraction in Action: Critical\/Mean Thoughts - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/06\/law-of-attraction-in-action-criticalmean-thoughts.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Law of Attraction in Action: Critical\/Mean Thoughts - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This is post 40 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read the posts in this series to see how. I\u2019m a nice person and don\u2019t want to be mean to anyone. But as I\u2019ve become&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/06\/law-of-attraction-in-action-criticalmean-thoughts.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Lessons from a Recovering Doormat\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2009-06-01T13:26:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/_W3h59OgJIAA\/SaHpXrJCljI\/AAAAAAAAA2U\/pXTiy5hJCLU\/s200\/*+LOA+logo2.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Daylle Deanna Schwartz\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Law of Attraction in Action: Critical\/Mean Thoughts - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/2009\/06\/law-of-attraction-in-action-criticalmean-thoughts.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Law of Attraction in Action: Critical\/Mean Thoughts - Lessons from a Recovering Doormat","og_description":"This is post 40 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read the posts in this series to see how. I\u2019m a nice person and don\u2019t want to be mean to anyone. 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Let Me Count the Ways, a She's appeared on hundreds of TV and radio shows, including Oprah, Howard Stern, and Good Morning America and has been quoted in dozens of publications, including the New York Times, Chicago Sun-Times, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Marie Claire, and Men\u00b9s Health. After being a consummate People Pleaser who felt unworthy of getting her own needs met for many years, Daylle found a path of self-love that enabled her to build her self-esteem and reinvent herself into a dual career. She learned to get taken seriously without being overtly assertive when she became one of the first women to start an independent record label (on a dare!) and learned to play ball nicely and successfully in an industry dominated by men. To help independent musicians empower themselves, Daylle writes music business books for Billboard\/Random House, including the very popular Start &amp; Run Your Own Record Labe and I Don't Need a Record Deal! Daylle's books have been translated into over 10 languages and are popular around the world. She speaks for colleges, organizations and corporations. Through her company, Project Self-Empowerment, Daylle creates programs and materials to help people empower themselves. One goal is to raise the money to self-publish her book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways and give it away for free in colleges and through organizations, to give thanks for all her blessings. Daylle uses her writing and speaking to help others find the kind of contentment and empowerment that she has.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/author\/dschwartz"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/107","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/83"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=107"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/107\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=107"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=107"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/lessonsfromarecoveringdoormat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=107"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}