{"id":5500,"date":"2011-01-03T08:59:06","date_gmt":"2011-01-03T14:59:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.jesusneedsnewpr.net\/?p=5500"},"modified":"2011-05-03T16:56:44","modified_gmt":"2011-05-03T16:56:44","slug":"a-special-report-instructions-for-those-left-behind","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/2011\/01\/a-special-report-instructions-for-those-left-behind.html","title":{"rendered":"A SPECIAL REPORT: Instructions For Those &#8216;Left Behind&#8217;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><object classid=\"clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000\" width=\"480\" height=\"385\" codebase=\"http:\/\/download.macromedia.com\/pub\/shockwave\/cabs\/flash\/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0\"><param name=\"allowFullScreen\" value=\"true\" \/><param name=\"allowscriptaccess\" value=\"always\" \/><param name=\"src\" value=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/qvxzCpL7XW4?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US\" \/><param name=\"allowfullscreen\" value=\"true\" \/><embed type=\"application\/x-shockwave-flash\" width=\"480\" height=\"385\" src=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/qvxzCpL7XW4?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US\" allowscriptaccess=\"always\" allowfullscreen=\"true\"><\/embed><\/object><\/p>\n<p>Basically.<\/p>\n<p>Eat dirt.<\/p>\n<p>And basically&#8230; eat paper!<\/p>\n<p>That&#8217;s it&#8230; basically.<\/p>\n<p>Oh basically, there&#8217;s one thing&#8230; basically run for your life because you&#8217;re S.O.L&#8230;.<\/p>\n<p>have fun basically.<\/p>\n<p>Thank you <strong><a id=\"watch-username\" href=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/user\/kccomputerdoctor\"><strong>kccomputerdoctor<\/strong><\/a>&#8230; <\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong><\/strong><a href=\"http:\/\/christiannightmares.tumblr.com\/\">Found at Christian Nightmares<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Basically. Eat dirt. And basically&#8230; eat paper! That&#8217;s it&#8230; basically. Oh basically, there&#8217;s one thing&#8230; basically run for your life because you&#8217;re S.O.L&#8230;. have fun basically. Thank you kccomputerdoctor&#8230; Found at Christian Nightmares<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":412,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5500","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>A SPECIAL REPORT: Instructions For Those &#039;Left Behind&#039;  - Jesus Needs New PR<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/2011\/01\/a-special-report-instructions-for-those-left-behind.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"A SPECIAL REPORT: Instructions For Those &#039;Left Behind&#039;  - Jesus Needs New PR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Basically. Eat dirt. And basically&#8230; eat paper! That&#8217;s it&#8230; basically. Oh basically, there&#8217;s one thing&#8230; basically run for your life because you&#8217;re S.O.L&#8230;. have fun basically. Thank you kccomputerdoctor&#8230; Found at Christian Nightmares\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/2011\/01\/a-special-report-instructions-for-those-left-behind.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Jesus Needs New PR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-01-03T14:59:06+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2011-05-03T16:56:44+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Matthew Paul Turner\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"A SPECIAL REPORT: Instructions For Those 'Left Behind'  - Jesus Needs New PR","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/2011\/01\/a-special-report-instructions-for-those-left-behind.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"A SPECIAL REPORT: Instructions For Those 'Left Behind'  - Jesus Needs New PR","og_description":"Basically. Eat dirt. And basically&#8230; eat paper! That&#8217;s it&#8230; basically. Oh basically, there&#8217;s one thing&#8230; basically run for your life because you&#8217;re S.O.L&#8230;. have fun basically. Thank you kccomputerdoctor&#8230; Found at Christian Nightmares","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/2011\/01\/a-special-report-instructions-for-those-left-behind.html","og_site_name":"Jesus Needs New PR","article_published_time":"2011-01-03T14:59:06+00:00","article_modified_time":"2011-05-03T16:56:44+00:00","author":"Matthew Paul Turner","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/2011\/01\/a-special-report-instructions-for-those-left-behind.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/2011\/01\/a-special-report-instructions-for-those-left-behind.html","name":"A SPECIAL REPORT: Instructions For Those 'Left Behind' - Jesus Needs New PR","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/#website"},"datePublished":"2011-01-03T14:59:06+00:00","dateModified":"2011-05-03T16:56:44+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/#\/schema\/person\/76db64a6819f8f63a896a0e0a5a6aaf6"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/2011\/01\/a-special-report-instructions-for-those-left-behind.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/2011\/01\/a-special-report-instructions-for-those-left-behind.html"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/2011\/01\/a-special-report-instructions-for-those-left-behind.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"A SPECIAL REPORT: Instructions For Those &#8216;Left Behind&#8217;"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/","name":"Jesus Needs New PR","description":"Beliefnet Voices - Matthew Paul Turner","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/#\/schema\/person\/76db64a6819f8f63a896a0e0a5a6aaf6","name":"Matthew Paul Turner","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/8e9\/8e908220acd7221e2b6f851e31b19923x96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/8e9\/8e908220acd7221e2b6f851e31b19923x96.jpg","caption":"Matthew Paul Turner"},"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/author\/mturner"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5500","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/412"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5500"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5500\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":61370,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5500\/revisions\/61370"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5500"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5500"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/jesusneedsnewpr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5500"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}