{"id":244,"date":"2010-06-28T12:58:40","date_gmt":"2010-06-28T12:58:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html"},"modified":"2010-06-28T12:58:40","modified_gmt":"2010-06-28T12:58:40","slug":"barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html","title":{"rendered":"Barry Petersen Shares Story of Love Lost to Alzheimer’s"},"content":{"rendered":"

I attended the most
\nextraordinary book party on June 15, for the award-winning CBS News
\nCorrespondent Barry Petersen, held at the Regency Hotel. <\/p>\n

<\/span><\/span>\"jans-story-cvr.png\"<\/a><\/span>It was to honor his
\ninspiring and heartbreaking book about his wife Jan’s sudden early onset
\nAlzheimer’s and his battle in caring for her and coping as her condition
\ndeclined. <\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>He opened the event with a video of his beloved wife and gave an
\ninspiring, tear-filled talk about losing his wife to this disease–and their experience today.<\/span> Here are some of the things he shared and information provided in a press release for the book:<\/p>\n

Barry and Jan Petersen had a fascinating
\nlife as foreign correspondents, and the kind of relationship that everyone
\ndreams about.  They were best friends, confidants, and even after 20 years, 
\npassionate lovers.  Jan’s vivacious personality could fill a room with warmth
\nand charm.  <\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span><\/p>\n

With no warning, Jan had her first episode
\n– a terrifying three days during which she heard voices in the local market,
\ncouldn’t make coherent sentences, and would turn the stove to high and walk
\naway. 
<\/span><\/p>\n

A frightened Barry called a California neurologist at 4 a.m. from their
\nTokyo home. Without even needing to see her, the doctor made the diagnosis – it
\nwas Early Onset Alzheimer’s Disease.<\/span><\/p>\n

“Perhaps it is good to have a name for a
\ndisease that will rob and cheat and steal and slowly suck the person you love
\naway from you,” Barry recalls in Jan’s Story: Love Lost to the Long
\nGoodbye of Alzheimer’s<\/strong><\/b><\/a>. Jan was only 55, and they had no idea that the
\nlife they had worked so hard to create…was over.<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span><\/p>\n

“On a Monday we are ordinary people doing
\nour jobs, raising our families, and fretting over mortgages or kids.  Then on
\nTuesday, with no more warning than a doctor’s diagnosis, we are recruited
\nwithout asking, into a job for which we have no preparation and facing sudden
\ndownward changes in our lives that we cannot predict,” writes Petersen of the
\nmillions of caregivers faced with a loved one’s diagnosis.<\/span><\/p>\n

In the world of Alzheimer’s caregivers, it
\nis called…as one social worker puts it…”the dirty secret of the disease.”  A
\nsecret about love lost and then facing the question of moving on. 
<\/span><\/p>\n

This secret
\nis explored openly and frankly in Jans’ Story<\/a>.<\/b>  Petersen, an Emmy
\naward-winning CBS News Correspondent, tells not only of losing the woman he
\nloved intensely for 25 years, but also of the guilt and doubt over finding a new
\nrelationship as Jan slipped ever deeper into the mist of Alzheimer’s. Still
\nmarried and caring for Jan, what woman would want a relationship with him?  In
\nthe end, Barry found Mary Nell, who reached into the depths of her own
\ncompassion to become a friend and co-caregiver helping to oversee Jan in an
\nassisted living facility.  <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>Barry, Mary Nell and Jan are part of a rapidly escalating
\ntrend, says the press release: the New American Family where one person is alive, but mentally gone.  The
\nAlzheimer’s Association warns that as America’s Baby Boomers age, this type of
\nfamily will number into the millions.   And each and every one will have to
\nanswer one question as Barry did:  Is finding a new person in my life right…or
\nwrong<\/span>?<\/p>\n

Barry said he was guided during this process by what Jan had taught him. “You must do your best to
\nlove what you have, in that moment, at that time. You must choose love. You must
\nchoose life.”
<\/span><\/p>\n

With a grieving and guilty heart, Barry tentatively opened himself
\nup to love once again. Jan’s care would always be his first priority, but he
\nneeded to move on. He needed to choose life.<\/span><\/p>\n

We met Mary Nell at the book party and she was lovely and sincere. There
\nwere many “Alzheimer’s widows” there who shared their stories about
\nlosing the loves of their lives to this disease. It was very touching and, even though the room was filled with CBS news stars, it was a down to earth event focused on love, loss and renewal.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I attended the most extraordinary book party on June 15, for the award-winning CBS News Correspondent Barry Petersen, held at the Regency Hotel. It was to honor his inspiring and heartbreaking book about his wife Jan’s sudden early onset Alzheimer’s and his battle in caring for her and coping as her condition declined.  He opened the event…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":73,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"fbia_status":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-244","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-kid-stuff"],"yoast_head":"\nBarry Petersen Shares Story of Love Lost to Alzheimer's<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Barry Petersen Shares Story of Love Lost to Alzheimer's\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I attended the most extraordinary book party on June 15, for the award-winning CBS News Correspondent Barry Petersen, held at the Regency Hotel. It was to honor his inspiring and heartbreaking book about his wife Jan’s sudden early onset Alzheimer’s and his battle in caring for her and coping as her condition declined.  He opened the event…\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Inspiration Report\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2010-06-28T12:58:40+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/inspirationreport\/files\/import\/assets_c\/2010\/06\/jans-story-cvr-thumb-230x327-15846.png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"lbrockway\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Barry Petersen Shares Story of Love Lost to Alzheimer's","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Barry Petersen Shares Story of Love Lost to Alzheimer's","og_description":"I attended the most extraordinary book party on June 15, for the award-winning CBS News Correspondent Barry Petersen, held at the Regency Hotel. It was to honor his inspiring and heartbreaking book about his wife Jan’s sudden early onset Alzheimer’s and his battle in caring for her and coping as her condition declined.  He opened the event…","og_url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html","og_site_name":"Inspiration Report","article_published_time":"2010-06-28T12:58:40+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/inspirationreport\/files\/import\/assets_c\/2010\/06\/jans-story-cvr-thumb-230x327-15846.png"}],"author":"lbrockway","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html","name":"Barry Petersen Shares Story of Love Lost to Alzheimer's","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/inspirationreport\/files\/import\/assets_c\/2010\/06\/jans-story-cvr-thumb-230x327-15846.png","datePublished":"2010-06-28T12:58:40+00:00","dateModified":"2010-06-28T12:58:40+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/#\/schema\/person\/519b1905b7de7569c8bf616a16ceb439"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html#primaryimage","url":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/inspirationreport\/files\/import\/assets_c\/2010\/06\/jans-story-cvr-thumb-230x327-15846.png","contentUrl":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/inspirationreport\/files\/import\/assets_c\/2010\/06\/jans-story-cvr-thumb-230x327-15846.png"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/2010\/06\/barry-petersen-shares-story-of-love-lost-to-alzheimers.html#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Barry Petersen Shares Story of Love Lost to Alzheimer’s"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/","name":"Inspiration Report","description":"Inspiration News, Life Advice and Emotional Wellness","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/#\/schema\/person\/519b1905b7de7569c8bf616a16ceb439","name":"lbrockway","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/ddd\/ddd44dc46baca8dcaf94c941287c37c0x96.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/wp-content\/wphb-cache\/gravatar\/ddd\/ddd44dc46baca8dcaf94c941287c37c0x96.jpg","caption":"lbrockway"},"description":"Laurie Sue Brockway is the Inspiration Editor of Beliefnet.","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/author\/lbrockway"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/244","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/73"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=244"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/244\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=244"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=244"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/inspirationreport\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=244"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}