{"id":7476,"date":"2013-09-12T00:00:35","date_gmt":"2013-09-12T04:00:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/haveamagnificentday\/?p=7476"},"modified":"2013-09-12T00:24:30","modified_gmt":"2013-09-12T04:24:30","slug":"transform-any-negative-pattern","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/haveamagnificentday\/2013\/09\/transform-any-negative-pattern.html","title":{"rendered":"Transform Any Negative Pattern"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Decision<\/a><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

To have wonderful relationships you must be good to yourself and you will then be good to others.\u00a0 You treat others only as well as you treat yourself.<\/span><\/p>\n

We are all human, most of us have negative patterns that can dominate the moment and a situation and create hurtful and destructive outcomes.<\/span><\/p>\n

How do you to transform a negative pattern so it no longer dominates your life and relationships?\u00a0 This is often an area that most people do not want to look at, deal with or acknowledge.\u00a0 This is what people like to hide or pretend doesn\u2019t happen.\u00a0 These negative patterns are also the most destructive forces that hurt your well being, health, success, family and relationships both personal and professional.<\/span><\/p>\n

It takes courage, faith, determination and vigilance to deal with your \u201cdark side.\u201d\u00a0 The good news is that any negative behavior or pattern can be \u201cunwired\u201d or transformed when it is important enough to you.\u00a0 First, you have to tell the truth and acknowledge what is happening when it happens.\u00a0 You don\u2019t have to like it but the first step is to be willing to see it for what it is and just observe – remember, <\/span>what you resist persists.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

When you transform, you no longer are the same person or do the same things you used to do in the same way.\u00a0 It is like when water turns to ice.\u00a0 It is no longer water, it is a completely different substance.\u00a0 For me, my relationships started to drastically transform when I did.
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

Here is some great information from Ariel & Shya Kanes\u2019 new book “A Match Made in Heaven<\/span><\/a>.<\/em>“<\/strong><\/span>\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cKindness begins with you \u2013 DON\u2019T JUDGE YOURSELF FOR JUDGING YOURSELF.\u00a0 In order to be kinder to yourself and others, you first have to pay attention to the way you currently behave.\u00a0 It starts by noticing when you\u2019re harsh and when you use derogatory terms or an abrasive tone.\u00a0 When you notice this behavior and don\u2019t judge yourself for doing it, then the behavior will dwindle away on its own (Third Principle).\u00a0 If however, you criticize yourself for what you see, then you\u2019re resisting your behavior.\u00a0 That will only mean that despite your best intentions, you won\u2019t be able to stop.\u00a0 You\u2019ll be trapped in a cycle of behaving \u201cbadly,\u201d then feeling \u201cbadly\u201d and then behaving \u201cbadly\u201d all over again.\u00a0 This is the First Principle of Instantaneous Transformation.<\/span><\/p>\n

When you are harsh with yourself for being harsh, it simply reinforces the behavior.\u00a0 In other words, what you resist persists, grows stronger and dominates your life. <\/span><\/p>\n

NOTICING WHEN YOU\u2019RE ALREADY UPSET: You may think that certain circumstances are inherently upsetting or frustrating, that they make you upset and cause you to respond in an abrasive manner.\u00a0 But if you take a look, you\u2019ll notice that when you react strongly to something, oftentimes you were already upse<\/em>t.<\/span><\/p>\n

DON\u2019T BLAME THE TRIGGER: Upsets can range from a low-level grumble to an explosion.\u00a0 It\u2019s easy to blame your partner, friend or circumstance or even yourself for doing something \u201cwrong\u201d when in fact you are simply pre-charged.\u00a0 For example, if you had a \u201cbad day\u201d at work or a frustrating day with your kids, when you get together with your spouse, it\u2019s far easier to snap at him or her as if your partner is the cause of your upset. Blaming something outside of yourself perpetuates recurring upsets.\u00a0 If you simply bring awareness to how it is that you function, without judging yourself for what you see, or blaming something or someone for causing them, these recurring upsets will lose their hold over you and with practice, you well be free of them.<\/span><\/p>\n

This wonderful book is full of valuable information that will transform your life.\u00a0 Take the appropriate action as often as is needed and go the distance.\u00a0 Remember, anything is possible!
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

Have a miraculous day!<\/span><\/p>\n

smiles,
\n\ud83d\ude42 Lee
\nThe MEGA Coach<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

\"transform<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

To have wonderful relationships you must be good to yourself and you will then be good to others.\u00a0 You treat others only as well as you treat yourself. We are all human, most of us have negative patterns that can dominate the moment and a situation and create hurtful and destructive outcomes. How do you…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":229,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,6,10,1,2,7,3,11,4],"tags":[12,29,13,14,18,15,21,9,17,19],"class_list":["post-7476","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-acknowledgement","category-communication","category-empowerment","category-personal-growth","category-professional-development","category-relationships","category-success","category-transformation","category-wealth","tag-challenge","tag-faith","tag-fascination","tag-fear","tag-following-your-path","tag-growth","tag-health","tag-inspiration","tag-opportunity","tag-path-to-success"],"yoast_head":"\nTransform Any Negative Pattern - Have a Magnificent Day!<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/haveamagnificentday\/2013\/09\/transform-any-negative-pattern.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Transform Any Negative Pattern - Have a Magnificent Day!\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"To have wonderful relationships you must be good to yourself and you will then be good to others.\u00a0 You treat others only as well as you treat yourself. 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For 30 years he has studied what motivates human\/spiritual beings. His life passion focuses on inspiring people to grow, awaken and actualize their divine potential. As co-founder of the Power of Acknowledgement organization in the eighties, Lee and his mentor, Michael Wyman shared a powerful technology to uplift people to achieve their dreams. In 1985, Lee and Michael served as motivational coaches for the New York Rangers working directly with Craig Patrick, who was assistant coach on the legendary 1980 US Olympic Hockey team. Lee also founded Insights to Excellence, Inc., a sales and management consulting and training organization. He developed and presented seminars designed to empower people to actualize their full potential, both personally and professionally. Lee's has two passions. As The MEGA Coach, his focus is to inspire people to live the divine plan of their lives. In addition, Lee is a Wealth Advisor in financial services and retirement planning. He provides effective financial solutions that guarantee protection, security and financial freedom. Lee graduated with a B.A. in Economics from the University of Rochester and an MBA in Finance and Human Resource Management from the University of San Diego. Lee uplifts people to make each day a masterpiece. 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