{"id":1519,"date":"2015-01-21T23:25:33","date_gmt":"2015-01-21T23:25:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gooddaysbaddays\/?p=1519"},"modified":"2015-01-21T23:25:33","modified_gmt":"2015-01-21T23:25:33","slug":"chronic-illness-a-disability-doesnt-equal-immaturity","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gooddaysbaddays\/2015\/01\/chronic-illness-a-disability-doesnt-equal-immaturity.html","title":{"rendered":"Chronic Illness: A Disability Doesn’t Equal Immaturity"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Maureen<\/a>I was on a call the other day, trying to make sense of error messages spewed forth by my computer (I eventually learned that the hard drive had died…another story entirely!). The connection was really, really bad and the person in customer service was speaking very quickly and slurring words on top of it. So, I asked her to please slow down and indicated it was hard to hear what she was saying because of the bad connection.<\/p>\n

I’d already told her that I had a disability that made it difficult for me to lug my computer down to the “nearest” authorized dealer…<\/p>\n

So, in response to my plea for slower and clearer speech, she began to “sing-song” her words and dumb down her language. As if I was hard of brain, as well as hard of hearing!<\/p>\n

I immediately clarified.<\/p>\n

“I might have a disability, but it doesn’t mean I’m feeble-minded. The problem is that the connection is bad and you’re speaking too quickly. Why don’t we hang up and start all over?”<\/p>\n

She agreed to call \u00a0me back, did so, and we had a much clearer and more appropriate conversation.<\/p>\n

You might have experienced this phenomenon, too. Whether your disability is visible or not, once you put it out there, some people might think it’s affecting your brain as well as your body. Which, well, there is lupus brain fog, and there are moments of exasperation…but…these are not permanent conditions and no reason to treat someone as if they were a child in an adult’s body.<\/p>\n

Always leaping forward into that “teachable moment,” I usually try to point these kinds of things out, as I did on this particular service call. Nicely, as much as possible, but clearly. It can be frustrating and energy-sapping to do so, but we’re all better off in the long run.<\/p>\n

If you are not disabled, but come across someone who is, please check yourself if you find yourself speaking as to a child or a pet. And if you are disabled and are on the receiving end of said, well-meaning person’s speech, take a deep breath and\u00a0then<\/em> let the person know you’re perfectly able to handle whatever situation as an adult. I’m right there with you!<\/p>\n

Blessings for the day,<\/p>\n

Maureen<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I was on a call the other day, trying to make sense of error messages spewed forth by my computer (I eventually learned that the hard drive had died…another story entirely!). The connection was really, really bad and the person in customer service was speaking very quickly and slurring words on top of it. 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She expected to be writing scripts. God had other plans. A few years after her graduation, Maureen was diagnosed with a life-threatening case of organ-involved lupus. Her life turned upside down as she grappled with the effects of the illness and other health conditions that ensued. She was no stranger to serious health challenges; even as a child, Maureen had survived numerous bouts of pneumonia, flu, and other infections. But lupus made her take a fresh look at her life goals - and took herlifelong, strong Catholic Christian faith and writing in a direction she'd never imagined. Today, Maureen writes and speaks about walking with the Lord while living with chronic pain and illness. Her most recent book is \"Don't Panic!: How to Keep Going When the Going Gets Tough (Franciscan Media). She is also the author of, \"Peace in the Storm: Meditations on Chronic Pain & Illness\" (Image Books\/Randomhouse), \"Beyond Pain: Job, Jesus, and Joy\" (Twenty-Third Publications), \"The First Year: Hypothyroidism, Second Edition\" (Perseus) and \"Taking Charge of Lupus: How to Manage the Disease and Make the Most of Your LIfe.\" She writes the syndicated column, \"Living Well,\" for Catholic News Service, and has also written for Saint Anthony Messenger Magazine, Journey for Women Magazine, The Upper Room Magazine, LupusNow, and Arthritis Today. Maureen's health continues to be a challenge, however she feels honored to be able to bring her perspective, from experience and knowledge, to others. \"Good Days...Bad Days with Maureen Pratt\" is a new way for Maureen to reach people who carry the burden of illness and pain in their lives, or who care for someone who does. Through the blog, she hopes to bring issues of health, wellness, and spirit into focus and, especially, inspire others that, no matter what health challenges, illness, or hardships they endure, each person can find a good way to realize the wonderful potential God has placed within each heart and soul.","sameAs":["http:\/\/www.maureenpratt.com"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gooddaysbaddays\/author\/mpratt"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gooddaysbaddays\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1519","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gooddaysbaddays\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gooddaysbaddays\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gooddaysbaddays\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/548"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gooddaysbaddays\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1519"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gooddaysbaddays\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1519\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1520,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gooddaysbaddays\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1519\/revisions\/1520"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gooddaysbaddays\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1519"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gooddaysbaddays\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1519"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gooddaysbaddays\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1519"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}