{"id":42,"date":"2014-10-15T00:36:17","date_gmt":"2014-10-15T00:36:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gimmeabreak\/?p=42"},"modified":"2014-10-15T00:36:17","modified_gmt":"2014-10-15T00:36:17","slug":"god-bless-my-powerful-painted-big-toes-wise-jellyfish","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gimmeabreak\/2014\/10\/god-bless-my-powerful-painted-big-toes-wise-jellyfish.html","title":{"rendered":"God Bless My Powerful & Painted Big Toes…& Wise Jellyfish"},"content":{"rendered":"

This is a story of love, of a pedicure, of recovery from bad stuff and\u2014for me–the power of painting the nails on my big toes\u2026and, oh yes, jellyfish.<\/p>\n

\"Toes<\/a>
Toes Being Prepared for Painting<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

The lesson here is not that there is joy in them thar pink toenails (or in my case, dusky beige) or even that pedicures can give you superpowers. Rather, it is that after life deals you a bad hand, you can deliberately step out of your comfort zone and do something different, resulting in a speedier recovery. A little bit of shaking up goes a long way, as I discovered by first getting a pedicure at a spa, part of bonding with my daughter in the place of my late wife, and then having my big toes painted. But you only need to change a little bit: I resisted the urge, for example, to step out of my comfort zone and into a pair of peep toe pumps\u2014it\u2019s not something either of my daughters would appreciate, nor was it necessary. And pumps\u00a0play heck with a guy’s\u00a0potential for a social life.<\/p>\n

The pedicure stemmed from a promise made to my late wife, Sharon who, during the months before she lost her battle with ALS, wanted to make sure that those she loved would \u201cnot just survive but thrive\u201d after her passing. And I was to be the means by which she would enable those she loved to have a better chance at living a joy-filled life (\u201cNot my first choice,\u201d she chuckled, \u201cbut time\u2019s running out and you\u2019re all I have to work with.\u201d)<\/p>\n

\u201cThere will come a time, after I\u2019m gone, that you\u2019ll need to focus on love in your relationships, both with the girls and others,\u201d she said. \u201cBut you have to allow yourself to love again, to do something different. We\u2019re all going to be fine. So let\u2019s break you out. Go get a pedicure with your daughter. And don\u2019t focus on your embarrassment, your conviction that a guy getting his feet done is somehow not quite right. If it makes you feel better, then while they\u2019re working on your feet do something manly like burping the Star – Spangled Banner. But just going with Brittany (our daughter) to a spa, concentrating on doing it for her and me, forgetting about you–you\u2019ll see a different world.\u201d<\/p>\n

And then her go-to phrase for answering all my objections: \u201cIt\u2019s a God thing, Stuart\u2014it\u2019s a God thing. Examine the patterns of your life after me and try to break out of the ones that don\u2019t work for you\u2014and let the Spirit change you\u201d She smiled. \u201cJust imagine me looking over your shoulder, whispering in your ear \u2018Get a pedicure, get your toes painted.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n

And so I\u2019m sitting in a resort spa, my daughter in the other room getting a massage, and a voice whispers in my ear just as the pedicurist finishes wrapping a hot towel around my feet. \u2018You\u2019re not done. Get out of your comfort zone\u2014get at least one toe painted.\u201d I looked at the pedicurist and relayed the message, but went bold: \u00a0\u201cWhen you\u2019re done, paint my big toes\u2014both of\u2019em.\u201d<\/p>\n

She looked at me, her brow furrowed. \u201cIs this a bet?\u201d she asked. \u201cWhat team?\u201d<\/p>\n

I smiled. \u201cIn a way\u2014I\u2019m betting on a future. And those painted big toes are the first step.\u201d<\/p>\n

The pedicurist looked at me\u2026and rolled her eyes.<\/p>\n

And the next morning, when my daughter and I walked barefoot through the ocean at the edge of the beach, we talked\u2026and talked and talked and talked, about life and happiness and what it takes to recover from bad \u2018stuff.\u2019 In my head, the jellyfish were crowding around, laughing at my big toes. But in real life, they were completely indifferent; in fact, being both male and female at the same time, they had seen it all\u2014and my painted big toes were of no interest.<\/p>\n

\u201cYour biggest obstacle after I\u2019m gone will be what\u2019s going on in your mind,\u201d Sharon had said. \u201cFocus on love, focus on God, on doing life\u00a0differently.\u201d And now the jellyfish were agreeing: Whether male or female and all points between, doing something out of the ordinary can bring healing and peace after walking through the valley.<\/p>\n

\u201cWalking through the valley,\u201d should you not recognize the phrase, is the way the Bible refers to the low points of your life, those moments when your\u00a0mind is numb, your body weary, and you wonder how you can keep going. But a healthy dose of faith, a willingness to step out of your routine and into the world, and\u2014for me–the power that flows from those painted big toenails has been\u2026well, positively spiritual.<\/p>\n

Now, hand me that nail polish remover.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This is a story of love, of a pedicure, of recovery from bad stuff and\u2014for me–the power of painting the nails on my big toes\u2026and, oh yes, jellyfish. The lesson here is not that there is joy in them thar pink toenails (or in my case, dusky beige) or even that pedicures can give you…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":581,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-42","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nGod Bless My Powerful & Painted Big Toes...& Wise Jellyfish - Aw C'Mon God Gimme a Break<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/gimmeabreak\/2014\/10\/god-bless-my-powerful-painted-big-toes-wise-jellyfish.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"God Bless My Powerful & Painted Big Toes...& Wise Jellyfish - Aw C'Mon God Gimme a Break\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This is a story of love, of a pedicure, of recovery from bad stuff and\u2014for me–the power of painting the nails on my big toes\u2026and, oh yes, jellyfish. 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