{"id":2514,"date":"2014-03-30T08:24:11","date_gmt":"2014-03-30T12:24:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayspirituality\/?p=2514"},"modified":"2016-10-19T09:10:02","modified_gmt":"2016-10-19T13:10:02","slug":"compromising-with-a-list","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayspirituality\/2014\/03\/compromising-with-a-list.html","title":{"rendered":"Compromising with a list"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>After getting married, although I worked away from the home, I still was in charge of home care and cooking. After having children it was obvious my husband needed to negotiate because the house work was becoming a burden.<\/p>\n<p>I began teaching my husband how to clean the house and do laundry. His cleaning abilities were minimal to say the least and I had to practice patience while teaching and re-teaching him how to clean.<\/p>\n<p>It occurred to me that my husband\u2019s perception of cleaning was different from my own. His goal was less \u201cto clean\u201d and more to \u201cget a job done.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Enter: THE LIST<\/p>\n<p>When I see scum and dirt, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayspirituality\/2012\/02\/gotta-laugh.html\">instead of getting angry<\/a> that my husband can\u2019t see it and clean it, I simply write a list of jobs on a piece of paper. He sees the task on the list that needs to get done and cleans and crosses off the item.<\/p>\n<p>From <em>21st Century Science and Health, &#8220;<\/em>Mutual compromises or a prenuptial agreement will often preserve an arrangement which might otherwise become unbearable. Agree on a realistic intent of the marriage and share the responsibilities to meet that intent. As you both fulfill the different demands of your <a href=\"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayspirituality\/2012\/11\/prayer-v.html\">united spheres, <\/a>you will feel supported, confident, and thus sanctify the union of wellbeing in which the heart finds peace and home.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>After getting married, although I worked away from the home, I still was in charge of home care and cooking. After having children it was obvious my husband needed to negotiate because the house work was becoming a burden. I began teaching my husband how to clean the house and do laundry. His cleaning abilities&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":429,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,7,4],"tags":[1330,1331,1329],"class_list":["post-2514","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-home-life","category-at-work","category-relationships","tag-cleaning","tag-house-cleaning","tag-keep-marriage-strong"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Compromising with a list - Everyday Spirituality<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayspirituality\/2014\/03\/compromising-with-a-list.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Compromising with a list - Everyday Spirituality\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"After getting married, although I worked away from the home, I still was in charge of home care and cooking. After having children it was obvious my husband needed to negotiate because the house work was becoming a burden. I began teaching my husband how to clean the house and do laundry. 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After having children it was obvious my husband needed to negotiate because the house work was becoming a burden. I began teaching my husband how to clean the house and do laundry. 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