{"id":188,"date":"2009-09-26T09:48:27","date_gmt":"2009-09-26T09:48:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/everydayethics\/2009\/09\/fighting-in-front-of-the-kids-never-sometimes-or-theyll-get-over-it.html"},"modified":"2009-09-26T09:48:27","modified_gmt":"2009-09-26T09:48:27","slug":"fighting-in-front-of-the-kids-never-sometimes-or-theyll-get-over-it","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayethics\/2009\/09\/fighting-in-front-of-the-kids-never-sometimes-or-theyll-get-over-it.html","title":{"rendered":"Fighting In Front Of The Kids: Never, Sometimes, Or… They’ll Get Over It?"},"content":{"rendered":"

I’d like to pose a question for all the parents out there — and for all those who lived through tough family situations as they were growing up. <\/p>\n

<\/div>\n
Is it OK for parents to fight in front of their kids?<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
I’m no parenting expert, and that’s not really the focus of this blog, but an event happened in my immediate sphere last evening that brought the topic to mind. There were angry parents and a tearful ten-year-old involved. No one meant for anyone to get upset; it just happened, and the child was a witness to an argument between his parents that freaked him out a bit. No lasting harm, I don’t think — his parents explained the reason for their fight later, explained things weren’t going down the tubes between them or anything — they’d just had a spat. He calmed down, wiped his tears, went back to playing his video games.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Still, I couldn’t help wondering… should they not have practiced more restraint?<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n

<\/p>\n

In my own childhood — and I say this with as much honesty and love as possible — there was no great level of restraint practiced. Loud voices, hurt feelings, ill-chosen words flew with no very great thought to consequences. And sure, I survived. But it’s nothing I’d want to inflict on the next generation. Still, I’m not a parent, and I’ve never experienced the pressures attendant with that great responsibility. So I don’t know if I’d be able to hold it together and bite my tongue, never say a sharp word to my spouse or another adult in front of my child.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
That’s why I’m turning it over to you all. What’s your take on this topic… “Take it outside”, or “They’ll take it in stride”?<\/i><\/b><\/div>\n

<\/i><\/b><\/div>\n
Subscribe to receive updates from Everyday Ethics or follow us on Twitter<\/a>!<\/strong> <\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I’d like to pose a question for all the parents out there — and for all those who lived through tough family situations as they were growing up.  Is it OK for parents to fight in front of their kids? I’m no parenting expert, and that’s not really the focus of this blog, but an…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":197,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,23,15],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-188","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-by-hillary-fields","category-parenting-responsibility","category-relationships"],"yoast_head":"\nFighting In Front Of The Kids: Never, Sometimes, Or... 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She attended St. John's College in Santa Fe, New Mexico, where she studied classics and philosophy, and then respectfully declined to spend the rest of her life in an ivory tower. Instead, she turned to the life of a writer and editor, penning three romance novels published by St. Martin's Press and contributing features to such periodicals as Cosmopolitan magazine. Her fascination with the moral dilemmas that crop up in everyday life--and the many intriguing ways people handle them--has always colored her writings. Now, that interest is leading her to take the discussion online; where, hopefully, the addition of reader feedback will bring these quotidian quandaries--and their potential solutions--vibrantly to life. When she's not plumbing the ethical mysteries of humanity, her passions include cooking (especially baking), origami, kittens, reading, watching really bad television and playing online scrabble. (And no, she doesn't cheat... much.)","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayethics\/author\/hfields"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayethics\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/188","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayethics\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayethics\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayethics\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/197"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayethics\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=188"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayethics\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/188\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayethics\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=188"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayethics\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=188"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/everydayethics\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=188"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}