{"id":6459,"date":"2020-05-05T14:54:57","date_gmt":"2020-05-05T18:54:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/?p=6459"},"modified":"2020-05-12T14:55:22","modified_gmt":"2020-05-12T18:55:22","slug":"experiencing-grief-doesnt-mean-youve-lost-your-faith","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/2020\/05\/experiencing-grief-doesnt-mean-youve-lost-your-faith.html","title":{"rendered":"Experiencing Grief Doesn\u2019t Mean You\u2019ve Lost Your Faith"},"content":{"rendered":"

Some believers are dismayed when well-intentioned fellow believers tell them that they shouldn\u2019t need to grieve if they believe. However, this is a shortsighted view of faith. Genuine faith is honest faith and suppressing your feelings of despair, anger and pain is not healthy.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Faith can offer comfort but grief can bring about a faith crisis<\/b><\/p>\n

Faith may offer a great sense of comfort when someone has lost a loved one. For many, their faith in God is what pulls them through times of tragedy, crisis and death. However, a loss can also cause believers to question their faith.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Believers may wonder why they are still experiencing such a deep sense of grief when someone they love is with God. It can bring about the worst <\/span>faith crisis<\/span><\/a> in their lives. This can happen to anyone and the journey through such a crisis can be long and hard.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Grief can release a torrent of emotions<\/b><\/p>\n

When you lose someone you love, you go through a whole array of emotions \u2013 pain, fear, sadness, guilt and much more. You may truly believe that your loved one is in a better place but this does not take away the feelings of emptiness and loneliness that you may experience. Simple actions, like choosing a headstone that truly reflects the personality of your loved one at <\/span>Memorials.com<\/span><\/a> can bring a sense of comfort.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Watching someone suffer from a prolonged illness before death or facing the death of a loved one in a tragic car accident may cause feelings of anger towards God. In some situations, like the loss of a child, people may feel the faith they\u2019ve always leaned on to fail them.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

The five stages of grief<\/b><\/p>\n

Elizabeth K\u00fcbler-Ross is well-known for writing about five stages of grief \u2013 denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. These stages are not experienced in a linear way \u2013 grief is messy and it\u2019s hard to predict how you will feel from one day to the next.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

However, experiencing all the different emotions and working through them helps you to reach acceptance. Everyone works through grief differently. Some may experience anger, more than any other emotions. Others may take longer to work through feelings of guilt.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Grief and faith aren\u2019t incompatible<\/b><\/p>\n

It is natural for human beings to feel grief. It doesn\u2019t mean you\u2019re being selfish or that you\u2019ve lost your faith. It is still possible to believe in God and His greater plan and grieve the absence of someone you love.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Filter what others say<\/b><\/p>\n

Other believers who feel that grief and faith are incompatible may judge and criticize you for feeling grief. Their comments can wound you deeply and make you feel that you\u2019re failing.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Try to hear their concern if it\u2019s genuine but ignore attempts to control <\/span>the grief journey<\/span><\/a> you\u2019re on. Don\u2019t let anyone else make you feel that your grief and your faith are incompatible.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

The healing process can take time<\/b><\/p>\n

Some people recover quicker than others but recovery takes its own time. You need to surround yourself with those who will give you the time you need to process your grief.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

In some cultures, people are officially in mourning for a year, during which time they wear black and no-one asks them why they are sad. In other cultures, mourners are expected to turn the corner, get over it and return to being the person they used to be as quickly as possible.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

You can\u2019t hurry your grieving, and you can\u2019t hurry through a faith crisis either. You need to take a deep breath and give yourself the time you need to heal.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Some believers are dismayed when well-intentioned fellow believers tell them that they shouldn\u2019t need to grieve if they believe. However, this is a shortsighted view of faith. Genuine faith is honest faith and suppressing your feelings of despair, anger and pain is not healthy.\u00a0 Faith can offer comfort but grief can bring about a faith…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":224,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6459","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-childrens-dreams"],"yoast_head":"\nExperiencing Grief Doesn\u2019t Mean You\u2019ve Lost Your Faith - Dream Gates<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/2020\/05\/experiencing-grief-doesnt-mean-youve-lost-your-faith.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Experiencing Grief Doesn\u2019t Mean You\u2019ve Lost Your Faith - Dream Gates\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Some believers are dismayed when well-intentioned fellow believers tell them that they shouldn\u2019t need to grieve if they believe. 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Genuine faith is honest faith and suppressing your feelings of despair, anger and pain is not healthy.\u00a0 Faith can offer comfort but grief can bring about a faith…\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/2020\/05\/experiencing-grief-doesnt-mean-youve-lost-your-faith.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Dream Gates\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2020-05-05T18:54:57+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2020-05-12T18:55:22+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Robert Moss\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Experiencing Grief Doesn\u2019t Mean You\u2019ve Lost Your Faith - Dream Gates","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/2020\/05\/experiencing-grief-doesnt-mean-youve-lost-your-faith.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Experiencing Grief Doesn\u2019t Mean You\u2019ve Lost Your Faith - Dream Gates","og_description":"Some believers are dismayed when well-intentioned fellow believers tell them that they shouldn\u2019t need to grieve if they believe. 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He is the creator of Active Dreaming, an original synthesis of dreamwork and shamanism. Born in Australia, he survived three near-death experiences in childhood. He leads popular seminars all over the world, including a three-year training for teachers of Active Dreaming. A former lecturer in ancient history at the Australian National University, he is a best-selling novelist, journalist and independent scholar. His nine books on dreaming, shamanism and imagination include Conscious Dreaming, Dreamways of the Iroquois, The Dreamer's Book of the Dead, The Three \"\"Only\"\" Things, The Secret History of Dreaming, Dreamgates, Active Dreaming and Dreaming the Soul Back Home: Shamanic Dreaming for Healing and Becoming Whole. His most recent book is The Boy Who Died and Came Back: Adventures of a Dream Archaeologist in the Multiverse. Over the past 20 years, he has led seminars at the Esalen Institute, Kripalu, the Omega Institute, the New York Open Center, Bastyr University, John F. Kennedy University, Meriter Hospital, and many other centers and institutions. He has taught depth workshops in Active Dreaming in the UK, Australia, Canada, Costa Rica, France, the Netherlands, Denmark, Sweden, Lithuania, Latvia, Estonia, Romania, Brazil and Austria and leads a three-year training for teachers of Active Dreaming. He hosts the \"\"Way of the Dreamer\"\" radio show at www.healthylife.net. He has appeared on many TV and radio shows, ranging from Charlie Rose and the Today show to Coast to Coast and the Diane Rehm show on NPR. His articles on dreaming have been published in media ranging from Parade to Shaman's Drum.","sameAs":["http:\/\/www.mossdreams.com"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/author\/rmoss"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6459","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/224"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6459"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6459\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6462,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6459\/revisions\/6462"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6459"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6459"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6459"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}