{"id":4535,"date":"2012-04-16T00:01:27","date_gmt":"2012-04-16T04:01:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/dreamgates\/?p=4535"},"modified":"2012-04-08T20:30:28","modified_gmt":"2012-04-09T00:30:28","slug":"youre-dead-because-ive-spent-your-insurance-money","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/2012\/04\/youre-dead-because-ive-spent-your-insurance-money.html","title":{"rendered":"“You’re dead because I’ve spent your insurance money”"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"\"<\/a>
Marc Chagall, "Night Visitor"<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

“I’m forever meeting my husband in my dreams,” she told me. “But he died three years ago. I keep telling him, ‘You’re dead’, but he won’t listen to me.”<\/p>\n

I asked where her dead husband appeared, in these dreams. Sometime he appeared to her in the house where they lived together. Quite often she found herself traveling with him to places she had never been in regular life. “Mostly Hawaii,” she clarified. “He always wanted to go to Hawaii when he was still alive. He was always bugging me to go to Hawaii on vacation, but I wouldn’t hear about it because money was always tight. He threatened to go to Hawaii by himself if I wouldn’t come, but he never did.”<\/p>\n

She paused, thinking about a recent dream in which her dead husband had been sporting an aloha shirt, toasting her with a mai tai under the palm trees.<\/p>\n

“He doesn’t seem to know he’s dead. I told him, ‘You\u2019re dead because I spent all your insurance money.’ \u00a0He still wouldn’t give me the time of day. Do you think he’s stuck? I’m tired of telling him he’s dead.”<\/p>\n

As we explore the dream, I had no sense at all that her deceased husband was stuck. He seemed to be very much alive, and highly mobile, in the reality he now inhabited. He was getting around, seeing the sights, having a good time, catching up on things he missed when he was in this world.<\/p>\n

I noted \u00a0that the word \u201cHawaii\u201d is a contraction of \u201cHawaiiki\u201d, the Polynesian name for the happy place of the ancestors, the desirable afterlife.<\/p>\n

“Our dead are almost always alive in our dreams,” I observed. “And that’s because while their bodies are alive, their spirits are alive somewhere else. If I were your husband on the other side, and you kept telling me I am dead, I wouldn\u2019t take you seriously either. I may not have a physical body any more, but my spirit is alive and in traveling mood.\u201d<\/p>\n

After further discussion, she agreed to sit down and talk with her husband. She would make a little ceremony, using a photograph and a personal object, putting out things he liked to eat and drink. She decided what she most wanted to say to him is, \u201cI\u2019d like to go to some of the places you can go.\u201d She smiled as she picked up her things. “Wow. I guess I’d better start packing.”<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“I’m forever meeting my husband in my dreams,” she told me. “But he died three years ago. I keep telling him, ‘You’re dead’, but he won’t listen to me.” I asked where her dead husband appeared, in these dreams. Sometime he appeared to her in the house where they lived together. 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He is the creator of Active Dreaming, an original synthesis of dreamwork and shamanism. Born in Australia, he survived three near-death experiences in childhood. He leads popular seminars all over the world, including a three-year training for teachers of Active Dreaming. A former lecturer in ancient history at the Australian National University, he is a best-selling novelist, journalist and independent scholar. His nine books on dreaming, shamanism and imagination include Conscious Dreaming, Dreamways of the Iroquois, The Dreamer's Book of the Dead, The Three \"\"Only\"\" Things, The Secret History of Dreaming, Dreamgates, Active Dreaming and Dreaming the Soul Back Home: Shamanic Dreaming for Healing and Becoming Whole. His most recent book is The Boy Who Died and Came Back: Adventures of a Dream Archaeologist in the Multiverse. Over the past 20 years, he has led seminars at the Esalen Institute, Kripalu, the Omega Institute, the New York Open Center, Bastyr University, John F. Kennedy University, Meriter Hospital, and many other centers and institutions. He has taught depth workshops in Active Dreaming in the UK, Australia, Canada, Costa Rica, France, the Netherlands, Denmark, Sweden, Lithuania, Latvia, Estonia, Romania, Brazil and Austria and leads a three-year training for teachers of Active Dreaming. He hosts the \"\"Way of the Dreamer\"\" radio show at www.healthylife.net. He has appeared on many TV and radio shows, ranging from Charlie Rose and the Today show to Coast to Coast and the Diane Rehm show on NPR. His articles on dreaming have been published in media ranging from Parade to Shaman's Drum.","sameAs":["http:\/\/www.mossdreams.com"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/author\/rmoss"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4535","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/224"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4535"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4535\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4540,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4535\/revisions\/4540"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4535"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4535"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4535"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}