{"id":3850,"date":"2013-08-08T09:51:59","date_gmt":"2013-08-08T13:51:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/dreamgates\/?p=3850"},"modified":"2013-08-08T09:57:17","modified_gmt":"2013-08-08T13:57:17","slug":"the-first-things-to-know-about-helping-kids-with-their-dreams","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/2013\/08\/the-first-things-to-know-about-helping-kids-with-their-dreams.html","title":{"rendered":"The first things to know about helping kids with dreams"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"\"<\/a>
“Why We Dream”, drawing by RM<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

The first thing to know about helping \u00a0children with their dreams is that adults need to listen up<\/em>. \u00a0This means making a space, a space where you\u2019re not interrupted where you\u2019re not distracted by the phone or other obligations.\u00a0 For a sufficient time it might just be five or ten minutes to hear the kid\u2019s dream and to be attentive to them and to provide a protected space for them to talk.\u00a0 That is the first thing: listen. And in listening remember that the child is the expert on the dream, not you.\u00a0 Children actually know more about dreaming than most adults because they\u2019re closer to the source of dreaming.<\/p>\n

The second thing to know about helping kids with their dreams is that \u00a0if they\u2019ve got scary stuff from the night, we need to help them to move it out right away.\u00a0 Help them shift that energy.\u00a0 If it\u2019s something yucky in the dream, take them outside and get them to spit on the ground, or get them to make an image of what scared them and tear it up.\u00a0 Sometimes what is going on in the night that scares kids is not really a dream but a disturbance in the psychic atmosphere. Family problems might be spilling over into the emotional atmosphere of the child\u2019s bedroom and sometimes they\u2019re picking that up, and they\u2019re responding to rather formless things that don\u2019t have the shape and content of dreams but constitute an unpleasant energy that needs to be moved out right away.<\/p>\n

When kids have scary dreams that have content and stories, they\u2019re being chased by a monster or something like that, the first thing they need from you is support and the assurance they have an ally.\u00a0 The first ally they\u2019re going to hope to find is you<\/em>. \u00a0You are their ally.\u00a0 They\u2019re facing something scary; be their ally<\/em>. A practical way you can help to prepare them to face scary things in the night is to give them something that can be a further ally. \u00a0Young children want something tangible; \u00a0a stuffed toy representing a fierce but friendly animal can be a terrific ally.\u00a0 I\u2019ve seen situations change in a household when the kid is encouraged to make the teddy bear, or the tiger, or the dog toy, the ally, the protector during the night.<\/p>\n

These are the first things, to listen and to help with scary stuff by shifting the energy and providing the ally. The third thing you want to do with children\u2019s dreams is to give them a creative way to celebrate their dreams and to play with them. \u00a0Help them to draw from the dream or develop the story, or turn it into theater. \u00a0Children are naturals for dream theater.\u00a0 They absolutely love play-acting the role of adults who appear in their dreams, all the actions of monsters. \u00a0I did a dream theater with a large group of kids between four and fourteen. There was a dinosaur and a T-rex in the dream and they had such fun play-acting them and the eggs the T-rex hatched, and the terrified mom who didn\u2019t understand that T-rex could be your very best friend.\u00a0 Absolutely hilarious, you\u2019ve got energy going; you\u2019ve got creativity coming alive.<\/p>\n

For the longer haul, as early as kids telling dreams, \u00a0you can encourage them to start keeping what will become a dream journal, their special place to keep their drawings and their private adventure stories.\u00a0 You might need to help them to write when they are very young, \u00a0their writing skills will grow, and this will help those skills to grow fast. \u00a0A \u00a0journal of this kind is going to be such a treasure box in that child\u2019s life and in the life of the whole family, and you\u2019ll go back to that with delight later on.<\/p>\n

~<\/p>\n

For more on helping kids with their dreams, please read Active Dreaming<\/a><\/em> by Robert Moss. Published by New World Library.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The first thing to know about helping \u00a0children with their dreams is that adults need to listen up. \u00a0This means making a space, a space where you\u2019re not interrupted where you\u2019re not distracted by the phone or other obligations.\u00a0 For a sufficient time it might just be five or ten minutes to hear the kid\u2019s…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":224,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15,39,1,10,5,2,14,44,21,11],"tags":[778,866,112,868,867,1248,1825],"class_list":["post-3850","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-active-dreaming","category-animal-dreams","category-childrens-dreams","category-conscious-dreaming","category-dreams","category-dreamwork","category-journaling","category-power-animals","category-psychic-health","category-psychic-kids","tag-creative-dreaming","tag-dream-ally","tag-dream-theater","tag-dreaming-in-families","tag-dreaming-with-children","tag-night-terrors","tag-nightmares"],"yoast_head":"\nThe first things to know about helping kids with dreams - 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He is the creator of Active Dreaming, an original synthesis of dreamwork and shamanism. Born in Australia, he survived three near-death experiences in childhood. He leads popular seminars all over the world, including a three-year training for teachers of Active Dreaming. A former lecturer in ancient history at the Australian National University, he is a best-selling novelist, journalist and independent scholar. His nine books on dreaming, shamanism and imagination include Conscious Dreaming, Dreamways of the Iroquois, The Dreamer's Book of the Dead, The Three \"\"Only\"\" Things, The Secret History of Dreaming, Dreamgates, Active Dreaming and Dreaming the Soul Back Home: Shamanic Dreaming for Healing and Becoming Whole. His most recent book is The Boy Who Died and Came Back: Adventures of a Dream Archaeologist in the Multiverse. Over the past 20 years, he has led seminars at the Esalen Institute, Kripalu, the Omega Institute, the New York Open Center, Bastyr University, John F. Kennedy University, Meriter Hospital, and many other centers and institutions. He has taught depth workshops in Active Dreaming in the UK, Australia, Canada, Costa Rica, France, the Netherlands, Denmark, Sweden, Lithuania, Latvia, Estonia, Romania, Brazil and Austria and leads a three-year training for teachers of Active Dreaming. He hosts the \"\"Way of the Dreamer\"\" radio show at www.healthylife.net. He has appeared on many TV and radio shows, ranging from Charlie Rose and the Today show to Coast to Coast and the Diane Rehm show on NPR. His articles on dreaming have been published in media ranging from Parade to Shaman's Drum.","sameAs":["http:\/\/www.mossdreams.com"],"url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/author\/rmoss"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3850","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/224"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3850"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3850\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5691,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3850\/revisions\/5691"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3850"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3850"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/dreamgates\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3850"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}